Escalation with neigbbours

[Chefpig]

I have had issues with my neighbours dog barking very frequently throughout the day and into the evening, sometimes waking me up (I have a 5am start if I am in the office). This has been ongoing since August last year.

I have tried to talk to them several times. A few times to the man in the street, to which he acknowledged an issue and was meek but said training had been delayed due to health issues (even though they'd had the dog three years by this point). I also was invited round to see the dog who proceeded to bark at me for 30 minutes straight without stopping with all the excuses in the book to why the dog wasn't trained, including her saying she didn't think the dog was trainable now after three years, despite them having her since she was a pup.

As my last visit to ask them shut the dog up as I was in a very important meeting was a failure in which he was very hostile, said that he was very busy and barged past me, I gave up speaking to them from that moment onwards.

The council got involved in May when I submitted logs. They installed a sound recorder, but the neighbours found out and kept their dog quiet that week and it fell just below the threshold by a small amount.

Now as the barking is frequent and daily without fail, I end up shouting through the walls as speaking to them hasn't worked. My mental health has become so poor to the point I think of ending my life daily. I am on antidepressants and my anxiety has hit the roof. I dread being home, I dread coming home and every bark sets me on edge. I am on edge even before the barking starts waiting for it to start.

Today, after shouting through the walls, the dog has not shut up, bar a short period this afternoon, as a last-ditch effort to save my sanity, I wrote the neighbours a very polite letter and went round to post it and she opened the door. She was really angry and I was very polite and started to say that I didn't come round for an argument, that I just wanted to post the letter and she started shouting at me about how she had spoken to the man at the council, who was lovely and then she started shouting about harassment. I then started to get scared. Was I going to get in trouble for harassment? She also shouted at me about chihuahuas and didn't I know about Chihuahuas? That they bark, that's what they do and that I needed to read up on chihuahuas. She shouted more about harassment. Then talked about how she has surgery for cancer coming up and then as I proceeded to tell her that chihuahua or not, the dog was her responsibility to keep quiet, she slammed the door in my face.

Sooo, as well as the stress of all this, I am now worried I am going to get in trouble for harassment. What makes me especially furious is that for a year, her husband used to strain his neck to look into my window each and every time he walked past. Sounds comical, but not a day went by he didn't do it each time he walked past, which was usually twice a day. I eventually spoke to him about it and he more or less stopped, but the fact she mentioned the word 'harassment' to me makes me so mad. Earlier today, before all this kicked off, I did speak to the council officer as the barking was bad and we spoke about getting another sound recorder installed, I did mention me shouting through the walls and that I was worried about harassment and he said as I am reacting to their noise, it won't be harassment, but I am very worried. I work hard to be able to keep a roof over my head. I also asked him about sending a letter, but he said not to as it could aggravate the situation, but with the time it's taking for the council to do anything, and even then the outcomes don't sound promising to be honest, with my mental health being so bad I was considering harming myself and everything else has failed so far, I decided to send a letter anyway. Even though neighbour was vile tonight, they have kept the dog quiet since our discussion.

For a bit of background, I am a single woman living here. Apart from showering, bathing and watching TV, I don't think I am loud at all. I listen to music with headphones on and listen to the TV low volume.

I am worried about this harassment thing. Can I get in trouble for it?

P.S. there's a poster who seems to get fed up of me posting about my ongoing issues with neighbours. Please don't comment that you're fed up on my post. I know you are but I'm allowed to post and do because I have no RL support with this right now. Thanks.

@Chefpig If you haven’t already involved your local councillor, contact him/her. As an ex social housing worker, in my experience a councillor chasing up a severe noise/anti social behaviour issue can make it a priority.

You have my sympathies, anyone suffering ongoing neighbour nuisance & noise will understand.

Thank you for putting my mind at ease. Is that (i can't get in trouble for harrassment) true even though I shout through the wall at them when they refuse to shut their dog up? I never threaten them, just tell them to shut their dog up and shout that they're neglecting it by letting it bark and get anxious.

Oh they absolutely can keep it quiet which is really, really stressful when they choose not to. Why would they actively choose to let their dog bark like that?

I emailed my MP a while ago and he said it was a case for the environmental health team and that he couldn't help unfortunately.

They don't shout. They only did since I went round yesterday with a polite letter. I shout through the walls as it's the only thing that might make them shut the dog up. Not always, but sometimes.

I wouldn't want to get arrested but I've thought about it so much.

My god op move and save your sanity. You can break your tenancy these days with the new laws. This is not worth thinking about ending your life over ❤️

Do not do this. Making the animal suffer is not the answer here and yes you could get into very serious trouble.

I agree with this sensible advice- your mental and emotional health comes first and whilst I understand you feel you shouldn't have to move, it might be the better solution for you.

The reality is from their perspective they didn’t have a problem until you moved in. The dog was there first. Not easy to quieten a chihuahua. The woman has cancer. How do you suggest they stop a dog barking? What’s your preferred outcome to achieve that between now and February? Dogs bark. Are you wanting them to get rid of the dog so you don’t hear barking for 4 months!?

Banging and shouting on the walls is signs of your frustration but also a loss of control your side. If you have headphones does that not drown out some noise? Not saying it isn’t disruptive but can see both sides. Name calling not helpful.

You have to put up with barking, them your banging and shouting. Ok…

You will definitely not get into trouble.

I have a neighbour who actually is harassing me and they initially tried to make counter claims of harassment which went nowhere.

It is quite a high bar and you simply responding to their actions in the way you describe does not even approach that level.

Does your district council have a community safety manager or parish council community safety officers?

They could be helpful to you.

You should keep a diary of every interaction and could consider a police report for any harassing or anti social behaviour from them.

Although environmental health deal with noise that does not preclude police involvement from associated escalation of conflict.

If this were me I would quietly accept that the owners are never going to change so I would buy decent noise cancelling headphones, practise meditation (this will calm you down), and make plans to move.

You will feel a lot less stressed if you feel you’re taking control.

Councillors are different to MPs, they have a much more localised remit. Some will have responsibility for housing, some for environmental health etc. They often hold surgeries where you can speak to them in person.

Agree with this. We've moved because of awful neighbours, so I do know a little about what you are going through, Op. Good luck.

Yes contact your local councillor.

Also move asap. Does your landlord have any other properties?

Are you serious? The situation for the OP is appalling, but poisoning a dog is not the solution. It's not the dog's fault it hasn't been trained, and death by poisoning would be agonising for the animal (not to mention a crime). No doubt you'll say it's "just a joke", but it's inappropriate and not funny.

You are shouting at the dog which sometimes works and causes the dog to stop barking. You are doing this to try to abate the noise nuisance and your neighbours should be doing this themselves. That is not harassment.

Tell them that you are moving out because of the noise and that you hope the next person who moves in is equally as noisy as your dogs. They may not like that thought very much.

Thank you for your message. I've been looking at other properties in my desperation for peace and quiet and reasonable neighbours. Anything is better than this. It has literally made me insane to the point I do shout through the walls for desperation of respite from it. Yesterday I was feeling so very depressed that I shouted about how I should start making noise and having parties, that they're neglecting their dog and that they've affected my health so much. That was before I attempted to post the letter in a desperate attempt to salvage my sanity back and have peace. I am miserable and also now detest my job because I can't concentrate on it because of the noise and stress. It's a job I used to love so much. Since I did take the letter round and got abuse from her, they've kept the dog very quiet and when it has barked, silenced it straight away. I hope it stays like this today but hold little hope from experience.

They refuse to talk to me civil and shut the door in my face or shout if I try speaking to them politely or otherwise, but I have shouted that through the wall a few times. Its a three bed property so I hope with all my might a noisy family with noisy toddlers or teenagers who play loud music move in and cause havoc.

Thing is, neighbour plays the health card when I have tried to speak to her on previous occasions and last night. She has cancer. It has nothing to do with me, so don't know why she tells me this.

I know exactly how you feel, OP. It's like your home and your peace of mind has been violated. Even when they're being quiet, you're on high alert just waiting for the noise to all kick off again. I lived next to vile scum like your neighbours too.

In the end I moved and it was bliss. Unfortunately I think you're going to have to move, too.

Thank you. Even the environmental complaints officer said yesterday when I phoned him in tears and desperation that it wasn't harrassment as I put the complaint through the council (I.e. the official way) and that if shouting through the wall works sometimes, then why not?

This harassment claim is coming from the woman whose husband stared in my window and strained his neck whilst walking past every single day to look into my property. I tried comedy waving but he just continued. One day I had enough and went out to him and although tried to deny it at first, then apologised for doing it. It happens much less now.

These are the people who argued nightly at 11pm at the top of their voices and the ones who screamed at their poor dog.

Sorry haven’t read the full thread but sending support. I loathe constant barking too and understand why you’re feeling anxious and on edge. The good news seems to be that you’re only renting so it’s not the end of the world to move presumably? Have you told your landlord the problem? Apologies if this has alrewdy been covered. Just wanted to give solidarity!