To say nothing?

[cousinquestion]

Name changed for this.

Happened to be on Facebook earlier today and cousin's husband had shared (accidentally?) a comment he'd made on a Facebook dating site. He deleted it within the hour, so I'm guessing he either realised he'd screwed up or somebody else warned him.

The comment was along the lines of 'when you look that good, who cares', it wasn't personal, I don't think he knew the person he was commenting on but regardless of that it's still a bit/lot of a red flag.

I've opted to say nothing to my cousin because I don't know how the Facebook dating site works, can you only comment if you're a dating site member or, if it happens to show up on your feed, can anyone make a comment?

Either way her husband is an idiot, but I don't want to accuse him of being on dating sites/cheating if it was just a one-off, stupid, inappropriate comment.

YABU - yes, you need to let her know
YANBU - to say nothing

Seems like some of the FB dating sites are public groups. I had a little look this morning and searched for FB dating sites, he's showing as a member of one of them.

Stupid, sleazy man.

I still won't be saying anything, they've been married a long time and she may well be aware. I'm not that close to them and definitely don't want to be the one throwing a grenade into their relationship.

In your shoes, I would be imagining that the reason it disappeared swiftly is that your cousin has also seen it (either because she came across it independently or someone else brought it to her attention) and has confronted him. Stay out of it until you're clear whether she already knows or not.
Like others on here, I would love to know who the third party is who decided that you ought to know, considering you're not particularly close to this couple.

Yes she is, but I don't know whether she saw her husband's comment, it wasn't up for long. It's quite possible that she saw it and that's why he deleted it.

I'm not going to say anything, she might already know, she might not, either way I'm not going to tell her.

It was a friend that sent it to me, cousin and husband used to live close by and we would all sometimes socialise. In the early years of FB, when lots of people would add everyone they knew as friends, good friend of mine and cousin and husband must have added each other as FB friends.

Keep your nose out. She may know and she’ll be embarrassed and never forgive you.

Why on earth are there so many deleted posts on this thread?

Probably a PBP.

Yes, this is what I'm thinking.