in being annoyed that the School Cook tried to intervene in a heated debate I was having this morning with my 8yr old

[moomoo1967]

My daughter and I were having a heated debate at 0800am this morning, in the school car park on my way to drop her off at the Breakfast club. This resulted in my dd hitting me on the arm, I didn't react I just told her that she wouldn't be able to watch her TV this evening.
I could see the cook watching us out of the corner of my eye, and as my dd went past she shouted after her " I shall be having a word with Mrs xx "
She looked at me and said did I want her to mention the incident to my dd's pastoral worker. I said no thanks that I was sorting it, but the look on her face judging me made me feel very uncomfortable. I feel that she should not have poked her nose in, so do I say anything to the school or do I just let it go ?

if my ds behaved like that towards me on school grounds and it was witnessed by a member of staff I think they would have something to say tbh. And I don't think i would have issue with that. While on school grounds one abides by school rules and those include not hitting people.

A child in ds' class ran off after being collected last week. he crossed to main roads and took himself to the park she'd only turned her back for a split second and he was gone. The whole school staff were out looking for him when someone saw him at the park and let her know.

He was given a very stern talking to by his teacher the next day.

Sometimes I think children respond better to their teachers/the head/other members of staff who they know only as authority figures.

Nothing to do with her, not her business. She may or may not mention it, it sounds like she has ideas above her station tbh. She might not have been judging though, she might have been thinking "oh god, poor woman, ive been there" I often find me looking on at tantruming toddlers thinking"thank god its not my turn today!" I'm not judging. I always feel judged though - human nature i guess.

If the school contact you, just say, thankyou, its sorted. Well done for not exploding though - tweenagers eh!

If it had been a teacher or a lsworker I may be thinking differently I suppose. Hey a Tweenager , omg ! lol roll on the teens, not !

pmsl at ideas abover her station

I think it sometimes does children good to know others disaprove of their behaviour.

I don't think she was judging you.

LOL at being above her station though

lol well it was just the way she butted in, I felt invisible and I suppose a little embarrassed that someone else had seen her hit me.
I am trying to get some Family Therapy for her as she does have quite a temper on her

"ideas above her station" Blimey, do you think cooks should creep along with shoulders bent and heads bowed, eyes to the ground?

Moomoo, I think the cook meant to be helpful and I agree school staff should take notice of badly behaving children even if they are with their mothers. Makes the children aware such behaviour is Not On.

it's got nothing to do with the fact that you're her mother, imo, and everything to do with your child hitting on school grounds. and another parent might have been terribly grateful for the intervention.
plus... i think i'd be pleased if the school cook considered herself responsible for the school as a community, not thinking she has ideas above her station, lol.

no I don't think that that should be the case at all, but I would never dream of butting in when the situation was obviously being dealt with. Although there wasn't really much I could do in the middle of an empty school car park. I am going to have a chat with dd tonight about her behaviour

I am rofling at 'ideas above her station.'

God DS2 has a school caretaker like this, she is in the office in the mornings thinking she runs the school.
I want to speak to the Admin staff not the bloody toilet cleaner.

Message withdrawn

sorry I changed names for another post

meant another thread

Waves at Chequers

Message withdrawn

Kimi on Tue 01-Jul-08 15:42:32
"God DS2 has a school caretaker like this, she is in the office in the mornings thinking she runs the school.
I want to speak to the Admin staff not the bloody toilet cleaner."

I have always been very happy to speak to our caretaker: he often takes the calls when they are not available. He is efficient and knowledgeable about how the school works and makes sure that any queries get taken to the right place, but is often able to deal with them himself. I think of him as a very valuable and responsible member of staff; I wouldn't dream of referring to him as "the bloody toilet cleaner". I think some of you have rather oldfashioned ideas as to how non-teaching staff are integrated in the school.

Personally, I would expect school staff to intervene if unsuitable behaviour was going on on school premises: their house-their rules. And if the heated debate involved shouting, then I would expect them to say something about that too, as they wouldn't want to see that modelled to the other pupils.