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AIBU?

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Disturbed after seeing bullies and vulnerable child

31 replies

Cocacolathanks · Yesterday 20:57

I’m so shaken up and I just don’t know where else to share this.

I live in a normal area, more on the rough side of Yorkshire.

My neighbours are thugs that basically hide behind religion and “connections in the council.” We don’t speak to them, my kids don’t play with theirs, and we hope to eventually move from the area. This is just one family, the rest of the street is more or less fine and get along mostly. We have a house or two with addicts who are known the police but otherwise calm.

There is a 6 year old girl a few streets away, clearly from a family that doesn’t give a shit. Her and her 8 year old brother are always roaming around alone or with older kids, always begging for ice cream from neighbours, and just generally looking a bit…vulnerable?

Today I witnessed her being bullied physically and verbally by a huge group of kids, including the little shits who I call my neighbours.

They scratched and pushed her, they called her names, threatened her by saying “shut up don’t you dare tell” when she was screeching about going home, and then I found out from a random kid that another 6 year old boy had been kissing her. I did not witness the kissing part, just the bullying afterwards where she was on the floor screaming her head off.

I got involved and the kids mostly ran off but I do know where some of them live or whereabouts they’re from as they’re all local.

I told her parents what happened and her dad sort of engaged with me but also didn’t really seem to give much of a fuck about anything. The brother was previously watching his distressed sister in silence and didn’t do anything when she was being bullied BUT in front of his parents suddenly started saying “I smacked them back! I told them! I told them you don’t mess with my sister!” Almost like he was justifying himself to his dad? It was so uncomfortable and confusing.

I glanced inside the home when I dropped her off and all I could see was a huge dog roaming around and her parents looked like they were half asleep, unbothered as she screamed her head off about being hit etc.

I dropped her and went home by which time the other kids had escaped home. I feel so disturbed and depressed almost… it feels like that there is no hope for some children out there.

The little girl was a different ethnicity to the kids bullying her who were from two different ethnic groups - one of which I also belong to. It very much felt like the ones with the same ethnic group as me were being extremely aggressive with her, the bully specifically saying “shut up” and smacking the little girl was at least 10-11 minimum. The other kids ranged from 7-11 I think. Maybe one or two closer to 13.

I just feel so sick about it all.

OP posts:
Cocacolathanks · Yesterday 22:55

I’m wondering if instead of getting angry, I should talk to the bully? Tell her she’s not in trouble from me but this isn’t ok, it’s not acceptable and if I see anything again in future I’ll be calling the police as well as her parents? Is that weird?

OP posts:
Lararoft · Yesterday 23:46

To be honest I wouldn’t get too involved OP, the bully could turn things against you or make something up about you if you try to talk to her about this incident and she thinks you’ve reported her to someone.. gangs of kids on estates can make adults lives very miserable when they want to!!

You’re reporting the issues to social services, it’s very upsetting, but now you need to take a step back.

Sadly kids can be really really nasty to each other and always have been. I remember my Grandad saying he had to protect his sister Lily & walk to school with her each day as she had a leg disability, so the boys would shout & throw things at her all the time. That was in 1920s Manchester.. so basically things never change!!

Notrainingbutpouring · Yesterday 23:52

Cocacolathanks · Yesterday 22:02

I literally think I’ll be up all night

has anyone else had to deal with something like this? How did you compartmentalise afterwards? I am just sitting here wishing I could find all the parents of the bullies and name and shame each one

Don’t compartmentalise. This is a horrific situation and you shouldn’t be able to switch off until you take the appropriate steps - report to social services, police and school. You did the right thing in the moment and you are disturbed because you’re a decent person. right now there’s a six year old child who doesn’t have the luxury of compartmentalising.

Cocacolathanks · Today 10:23

Another detail just came to mind. When I took her home, she was screaming at ME “don’t follow me! No! I’m gonna get in troubleeeeeeeee!” And that really made me feel horrible and worried for her. I did say to her parents that she’d done absolutely nothing and hammered in the fact that it wasn’t her fault or anything but it made me feel guilty in case I’ve gotten her into more crap!

OP posts:
StepawayfromtheLindors · Today 10:34

SkinnyCigarette · Yesterday 21:11

Oh FFS.

You witness a young child be PHYSICALLY ASSAULTED by a large gang of older kids.

Of course the police need to be informed. And if her parents seem neglectful then they will take this seriously, as will social services. Dont just assume they are involved.

Safeguarding is EVERYBODY’S responsibility.

Make the reports NOW.

Yes it’s not rocket science OP. Just get on with it ASAP.

Cocacolathanks · Today 10:39

StepawayfromtheLindors · Today 10:34

Yes it’s not rocket science OP. Just get on with it ASAP.

As I said previously, it’s been reported.

I genuinely didn’t realise that child on child bullying was something the police would even take seriously.

OP posts:
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