PAYING YOUR SISTER TO VISIT - IS THAT NORMAL?

[milkmonster]

My sister and friend just travelled 200 miles to stay over a night with me, before they drove onto a function nearby.

They both left me £30 between them for letting them stay, which I tried to refuse, but they insisted!

What's the etiquette around this? Should I have insisted harder they don't leave me money, or should I accept politely (well I did anyway, but very reluctantly!)

I am a single mother which they are aware of, but I'm not desperately short of cash, and their staying over one night was no hardship to me. I have stayed at my family's many times and never offered money, and this is the first time my sister has done so.

Does anyone have any ideas why it was done? Was it just a kind gesture, as I feel most embarrassed that her friend also gave money!

I bet because she felt like otherwise she'd be using you! She wasn't coming for a visit, she and her friend were using the house for a b&b (not in a nasty way!) for their function, so I'd guess she did it maybe partly because she thinks a single mum might be a bit strapped and partly because she didn't want to feel like she was taking the piss???

i think it was really kind of her. i imagine if they had had to use a B&B, they would have paid at least £30 a head. and when you have guests, they use your hot water, eat your food etc.. so maybe she felt that she wanted to make sure you weren;t out of pocket.. if you don;t desperately need the money, accept it in the spirit it was given, and treat yourself to something lovely with it

how lovely to have such a thoughtful sister

Agree with Hecate. I can see why you're uncomfotable, but I expect your sister and (especially) her friend felt the same and didn't wasnt to take advantage. An awkward situation, but I think everyone acted correctly.

I've never heard of giving money. A small gift maybe, but not cash. I agree w/ Hecate that they felt like they were 'using' you as a b&b. Sounds like the meant well.

My brothers do this when they stay. They're both much better off than we are with no dependents etc. At Xmas they come down for a week or so and give me loads to cover food/wine. I don't like taking it, but if I don't they hide it in places I'll come across later - or I get an e-mail saying how's your biscuit tin? or something

my sister her husband and their 4 yr old son visits mine every few months for a week and doesnt give us any money to stay which i think is very rude knowing our financial situation.
they earn way more than we do and where they live the cost of living is much lower.
the only time they off er to pay is at xmas.
im gonna ask for money towards food next time .....no more mrs nice guy!!!!!

They were just being kind.