AIBU to wonder if my 15-year-old has an unusual ear for music?

[IffWhite]

Is this unusual? DD is 15 and just this evening we were vaguely singing 2 songs - Killing Me Softly and the sea shanty Hoist The Colours. She drifts over to the (out of tune) piano and manages to work out the notes almost immediately, plays it, tinkers about with it, then drifts away again.
She has always been musical, and we were told this a lot when she was very little - by ballet teacher and other adults who heard her sing.
She does singing and an instrument, but she doesn't think its unusual - can lots of people do this sort of note thing by ear?
(She has never learnt piano, btw)

It’s rare if she can hear a note and name it, and play it instantly. Playing by ear with relative pitch is something most people can do if they’re musical.

E.g. she might play a song from the radio, but is she playing it in the correct key.

I think whether you can do this sort of thing probably depends on your early childhood experiences. My mother is a pianist so I was exposed to constant playing, starting in the womb, and then started an instrument at a very young age. I can ‘see’ intervals between notes when I hear music (difficult to describe but it’s like a visual thing that flashes through my mind), and then I can play it without any particular mental effort. It makes memorising music easier too because I know what it ‘looks’ like.

I’d say most of the people I know who play an instrument can do this to some extent. My instrumental teacher couldn’t do it at all without written music and developed a real interest in why some people could, he’d get all his students to try and then ask them about it. His conclusion was that it was something to do with lots of exposure to music very early in life, but that’s just our best guess really from anecdata.

I teach whole-class music in a primary school and have spent ages trying to find the most effective methods. I use techniques that require children to sing the same intervals again and again using songs and games, starting very young. Most of the kids I teach can notate a simple melody that I sing to them and could play it back on a xylophone after a few listens by age 7 or so, some a bit younger. So I think it’s something that most people can do if they have the right musical building blocks in place, if you see what I mean.

Hi OP, I think it it’s reasonably unusual. We’re quite musical in my family ( all play instruments and read music) but only DS can hear a tune once and play it note perfect on piano/brass. He can pick up an instrument and just play it. He can transpose at sight, harmonise instantly. He has perfect pitch, which I think is what enables him to do this, it’s certainly not something he has acquired through practice! Perhaps your DD is the same, it sounds like it.

Why is she 'drifting' everywhere?

Misses point of post

This isn’t unusual

I do think some people are more musical than others. I started at three or four and was always making up little tunes on the piano etc so I must have enjoyed it. From quite young I could by play the melody with the right hand and also put simple chords to it in the left.

I’ve also got perfect pitch which helps as I hear the note in my mind and then immediately know which note it is.

If you play me a hymn or pop song now it won’t take me long and I can reproduce it largely on the piano. Probably won’t get some of the more nuanced chords-inversions-7s etc but will get the basic chord progression right enough.

i don’t think you’re born with perfect pitch I think you develop it if someone happens to teach you the names of sounds (ie notes) when you’re 3 or 4 - in the period of major language acquisition.

You own a piano (I’d love to have the room and money) and yet think it’s unusual to be able to pick out a melody on it?! Aren’t people doing that all the time?! I remember as a child every time we went to a great aunt’s house people picked stuff out on her piano and we weren’t especially musical.

I can…and I don’t class myself as particularly musical. You should definitely encourage her to pursue her music if it’s something she loves though.

v

I could do this as a child but probably not now.

I doubt she has perfect pitch if she was playing a tune by ear on an out of tune piano. The musicians I know with perfect pitch really struggle with anything out of tune or not in A440.

My adult DS can play by ear and doesn’t read music.

He’s musical and plays a couple of instruments- one he had lessons, the other self taught - and he’s in a couple of bands that have done the odd gig! It’s a great hobby for him. He can also hold a tune and has a pleasant voice although he’s not the main band singer.

My DH can quite quickly pick up a song he’s never heard before on the guitar.

I think a reasonable number of people can do this. In my opinion it definitely puts her in the top 50-25% but beyond this I’m not sure. I think picking out notes and finding the tune can’t be done easily by a lot of people, but it’s probably more people than you think.

I guess not unusual, as so many on the thread can do it. I’m impressed though, I got to grade 5 on piano and cannot play by ear at all, I have to read the music or memorise a piece.

My DS does this too. He's also 15 and has played the cello since year 7. He has more or less self taught himself the piano by listening to music by ear. DS1 learnt the piano but has little interest in music and can't do it. I don't think it's unusual but it does show she has an ear for music and enjoys it. I can't play any instruments but I used to dance Latin and ballroom when young, and can pick out a base rhythm quite easily when others can't hear it.

No, it’s not unusual at all, especially for someone who already plays an instrument. Great for her that she can do it though.

I think that students who have learned an instrument via the classical route - i.e. playing from full sheet music are less likely to have trained their ear. If you don't play from sheet music then, pretty much by definition, you have no choice but to play by ear and therefore get much better at it. Most pop/rock and jazz musicians don't use sheet music in the same way as classical musicians - we use, at the most, lead sheets, which just show the topline melody and chord symbols.

See the attached sheet - this tells me everything I need to be able to play this piece on piano or guitar, and if you gave it to a jazz quartet they could instantly play a full version of it. However it would leave many classically-trained musicians wondering e.g. where the left hand/bass line was, let alone what to do in the B section.

I don't play piano (I do play other instruments and sing) but I can do this, always have. It's not unusual but it means you have good pitch, especially good relative pitch, which is more useful than perfect pitch.

I can do this with a melody line on a piano; I don't play the piano, had some instrumental lessons as a child, but certainly wouldn't consider myself a musician. I've got maybe a slightly better ear than average, but that's all. I couldn't add the relevant chords, or play variations on the melody, which is what my actually musical friends can do.

As an aside, I'm always ridiculously impressed by pianists in cabaret/variety shows who seem to be able to respond to any requests people call out, improvise medleys, follow a performer etc. I'm sure there's a certain amount of rehearsal, knowing basic chord progressions that underpin a lot of stuff, etc. but I always think it's mind-blowing.

I don't think it's that unusual to be able to find a melody. It's fun though and a nice thing to be able to do! (And people who can't do it are always impressed!)

Being able to work out the chords would be more difficult and unusual.

Don't downplay it though - keep encouraging her. It's great that she likes music.

I have some thoughts about this, as someone with absolute (perfect) pitch!

I think it’s a spectrum (useless/tone deaf to very acute auditory perception). Weirdly, although I can pick out a tune on any instrument (plus chords if it’s a piano or guitar), my memory for lyrics is very poor.

I also think that a lot of neurodivergent people are very firmly on one end or the other of the pitch perception spectrum (I wonder if this relates to hyper- and hypo- sensory perception).

To me it sounds very impressive.

Im not musical and couldn't do it in a million years.

Yeah I can do this and so could my dad

Didn't make me a particularly proficient musician as I lacked the self discipline, though I got to grade 8 piano. Just have a good "ear".