When I was younger (much younger), very early 20s just out of uni (so probably 20 or 21), I had a boyfriend and was with him for around two years. We moved in together towards the end of those two years, and things were generally ok. Not the love of my life but not awful. Realistically it was never going to last. I had a feeling something was up as he was being extremely secretive with his laptop. Never an issue previously as we never lived together. I looked (not going to give a long preamble about why like some people do, I was just doing my due diligence). I found a website he was on called something like adult work, where he had been talking to a load of redhead escorts. Shocking but not illegal. I was furious. I went back through his search history and found a website with a reference to 'jail bait' and clicked on it. Found he had an account that had pictures of very young people on it. I am talking single figure ages. All dressed but all in dance leotards. He had saved hundreds and hundreds of them and had made quite frankly vile comments on them. The website wasn't hard to find, wasn't on the dark Web, just a random website. I suspect it wouldn't exist anymore. Iremember feeling physically sick and called my friend who told me to take his laptop to the police station. Which I did. They took one look and said that he hadn't done anything technically illegal so they couldn't do anything. I confronted him and he did not ask me to stay when I said it was over and he just begged me not to tell anyone. I remember his friend randomly harassing me via text when I left and I texted my ex saying if his friend wouldn't stop I would tell them why I left. The harassment stopped. I left and ended the lease, and never spoke to him again. He never tried to contact me. He is now a nurse, has a wife and a child, and I just feel like I have never really addressed my feelings around all of this. I was so young. I was really ashamed that I had been in a relationship with him and now wish I had taken his laptop to his workplace. I just feel like I handled it all wrong and he is likely a paedophile. Not sure where I am going with this, just think I needed to write it down as I have never told anyone apart from that one friend.
Sorry if the title isn't ok. Mn feel free to change.