AIBU to ask whether this level of period pain is normal?

[Romandaisy]

This is a bit embarrassing I guess, but I need to see whether my experience is standard, or not.

We are told periods are painful so I have always assumed mine are standard. But I am struggling today and wanted to ask.

Day 1-2: particularly painful. Often have to double over (usually at night), urge to sit on the loo, feel very upset because of the pain. However paracetamol and hot water bottles help. I find myself feeling spaced out.

Day 3-4
Varies, can be on the more painful end or can actually be fine. Less painful than the first couple of days though, usually manageable.

Day 5-7
Almost always no pain.

My periods can be around 4 weeks, 5 weeks or just disappear for some time. I cannot plan my life around them and I dread having a day 1-2 experience when I need to do something fun. I have never missed work, but I have been a lot of pain too many times to remember.

Is this a normal level of pain? How painful should a period or "cramps" (I've never really understood this as cramps implies not constant) be?

I absolutely get this too, and always have (before I developed IBS).

I'm going to call for an appointment 😬

I've booked an appointment 😊

I'm pretty sure it's not normal to have periods sometimes last for 4 or 5 weeks. That's a lot of blood loss. Make sure to mention that to the doctor as well.

I had awful periods and PMDD and eventually decided to try the mini pill which made life so much better and stopped my periods completely. I would've had surgery to investigate endometriosis otherwise, but I cancelled it as I didn't feel the need while my symptoms are managed so well with the mini pill.

I'm so pleased you got your life back!

Sorry for the miscommunication, I meant four or five (or random amounts!) of weeks apart, thankfully they only last a week.

Oh, it's impossible to plan your life around your cycle when it's unpredictable. It sounds really difficult. I hope the GP helps and things improve quickly for you.

I always used the pill back to back, no break, no period. Best thing ever!

I was just reading about this. I actually feel excited, which is obviously crazy. But my life has been ruled by periods for 18 years.

This level of pain is not normal. You really need to go to your GP. I'm sorry you have been experiencing this for so long.

I agree with everyone saying that your pain is not normal. Is the bleeding heavy too? I've been lucky with just mild cramps but DD has had a miserable time of it and has very heavy periods with lots of floods and clots. She was also diagnosed with IBS and has painful flares down her legs. She recently saw a physio for something else who pointed out that her pelvis is very twisted and gave her some exercises for that and her last 2 periods were not as bad. Early days and anecdata but might also be worth looking in a mirror to see if you stand straight or not?

I'm sorry to hear your daughter suffers too. That's very interesting, I'll look in the mirror when I get home. In terms of the heaviness, that's another one where I feel a bit weird. I don't think it's particularly heavy in general until I go to loo and it's pretty horrific. I'm not sure how common that is but it can saturate the toilets paper easily and a lot comes out when I sit (sorry this is a bit TMI). I'm so pleased your daughter has seen some improvement!

@Romandaisy - that doesn't sound normal. The only way DD was able to get the DR to take her seriously was by photographing all her clots and floods and getting her phone out and scrolling through them........ maybe worth adding this to your diary of symptoms?

Yes I sometimes wonder if it was a sign of things to come!

Out of interest what meds help with your ibs?

Well done on booking an appt. Honestly getting rid of painful periods will make such a change to your life

I’m excited for you!

I had the periods like you from age 13-18.
That was horrendous enough. I should have gone on the pill at maybe 15 or something but I think sadly it has a stigma when you’re that age.

Thank you!

Amitriptyline is the med that has helped me 😊

That’s the second time I’ve read about that this week :) unfortunately I tried it for migraines and didn’t notice any changes to my ibs :/ thanks anyway!

Oh really? I also get migraines and haven't noticed any difference with those (if anything they are actually worse) but luckily I don't get them too frequently. They are the worst though! It's funny how much overlap there seems to be. I will say that I also made some big changes to my diet and had to do the FODMAP process, so it's probably a combination of everything. The pain I felt with and IBS attack and a very painful periods is quite similar, so I imagine they're all working together to troll me!! I'm starting to come out the other side pain-wise today so my sense of humour is back!

I have never been successful at going full blast with the FODMAP diet but its something I keep meaning to do... It is isn't it! That's annoying the amytriptaline didn't help your migraines at the same time!

I don't think I'd have managed it by myself, I had some help from a nutritionist. I was struggling to keep any food in and lost a lot of weight. I did my own version of it, but essentially an elimination diet. I managed to reintroduce everything apart from gluten, which I have now strictly avoided for many years. I am actually not a sickly person, I never get colds or coughs or the usual stuff, but I seem to be collecting various pain conditions like they're going out of fashion.

I spoke everything through with a friend earlier and she was super helpful. I'm feeling more positive about Saturday. I didn't really mind if it was a man but I've got a female doctor around my age, so I do think that'll make it easier to describe.

Well it was normal for me and I’m furious I had to put up with it for so long. I would be doubled up in pain, diarrhoea, sometimes vomiting, pain down my legs etc. Saw my GP (Ireland, early 90s) and asked to go on the pill, was firmly dissuaded as I was from a nice family and didn’t need it.
Finally got a prescription for a pill that worked for me when I moved to the UK (this heathen country with loose women using contraception) and realised I’d been suffering unnecessarily for 15 years.
Please see your GP, if not for hormonal contraception which you may not want, at least for some decent pain relief.
I Believe acupuncture can also help although can’t say it did much for me.

Sounds like me from late teens to late 20s. I'd get acid reflux and loose bowls and the tops of my thighs would go numb with the pain. I remember lying on the ground in agony in a college toilet cubical.

I had a few investigations to rule out fibroids etc and nothing unusual was found. Thankfully it settled down in my 30s and I was able to get pregnant easily so presumably there wasn't anything wrong with my reproductive system. Ramped up again now I'm mid 40s and in agony for two days instead of one!

Bowels

Now I'm through those 4 terrible days and finally feel ok pain-wise, I'm now second-guessing myself. I feel anxious about my appointment but I can't really put my finger on why.

Honestly im the same and I dont just get pain during my period but intermittently through the month but any time I had a good day, I would think am I just exaggerating this in my head and then the pain would be back a couple days later.

I had severe pain the other day, so bad I went to a&e with it, and again when I would have a lull for 10 minutes I would think the exact same thing and then it would return and I could not stand or move and think nope this needs checking.

Honestly even if you are ok now, it needs checking but your wait to see someone will likely be a long one so get a diary in some form and on those bad days make as many notes as you can, also note down your IBS stuff because if this is endometriosis it could actually be that (I thought I had IBS but its actually bowel endometriosis) so its worth keeping a note of it all even if you think its unrelated

Please go to the appointment.

When is it?

You should not be in this much pain each month that it's impacting your quality of life.

Are you on the pill?

I take mine continuously now and don’t break for a period. Doctor said guidance has changed and it’s fine to do that. No more pain!