AIBU to ask for realistic mortgages and incomes from average/middle income houses?

[SmallHouseEnergy]

Live in an affluent area, but in the smallest houses (3 bed end terrace, good sized garden. Bedrooms are all small, 2 singles and a small double. 1 bathroom, 1 living room, 1 kitchen - again, small).

1 DC, me and DH. Hoping for another DC asap. TTC.

We have plenty of space to extend massively to side but astronomical costs for extensions so may not for a long time.

DCs peers all have big houses, 4/5 bed, massive size. One even has a mansion and pool.

We have been and got quotes for extensions, and also figures for what we could borrow on a bigger house. Being told we could go up to £400k house which seems like insanity. We earn £85k for reference joint, per annum. Current mortgage is smallish, £160k.

I am after some perspective for average/middle earners outside of London please. If your household income is £70-90k per annum, what’s your mortgage and monthly payment roughly? Does it work? Or are you stretched?

we are torn between doing a medium extension and adding an extra £60-90k mortgage or moving to a bigger house possibly an extra £120k for next ‘level’ up not even more bedrooms but just an extra bathroom and a dining room, with a decent garden still. Aib

We are outside London with one salary of just under 80k.

We live with two DC in a terraced house with three bedrooms, one being very small (modern terrace, so very small rooms). One bathroom, no utility and we manage fine! Our mortgage is under 100k and we pay around £800 every month.

Everyone we know has large detached 4-5 bedroom houses but the difference is that we don’t compare ourselves or care!

We wanted to increase our payments earlier this year as after paying off a lump sum the mortgage company reduced the payments instead of the term, but they wouldn’t allow us to without doing all the checks to confirm we could pay what we’ve always paid 😂 Anyway, when they saw our income they said we could have a much larger mortgage!

So it would be an option for us to have a larger house but we quickly decided against. The extra money with two older DC (11 and 13) is definitely needed for all their activities etc. We’d much rather be in a smaller less impressive house and be able to enjoy life more, and go on fantastic holidays (and pay bills!) etc without scrimping. Everything is so expensive nowadays.

Also we are seeing older family members having to downsize due to health issues and their houses being too big for them. Our house is the perfect size for us as a couple - yes it’s a bit tight with two DC, but they won’t be in the house forever!

Lots of younger people starting out on the ladder do have fairly large mortgages. I’m not sure MNs will be particularly representative

We ear about £100k between us. Mortgage £1022 a month but only £53k left on mortgage. I think the house is valued around £560k. It’s quite spacious but we live in the North. We were stretched earlier in working lives not so much now.

it’s crazy in this day and age that 80k barely covers the basics. Nursery fees are only temporary at least

For the sake of balance, our mortgage (on a smallish 4 bed detached in a nice area, not in London) is just over 3k per month.

Take home pay is a bit more than yours at about 120k, but we have three little kids. The mortgage doesn’t feel that extraordinary. We had been used to living in very small London flats with high rents, and I suppose that shifted our perspective. Having a bit of space and, especially, a garden, has been game changing for us all.

I thought that too but actually the teenage years are proving way more expensive - and university years are looming on the horizon. We were so excited to finish nursery payments but everything else took over from them. Just something to consider for anyone thinking it gets cheaper!

We’re in Northern Ireland. House prices are lower, but incomes generally lower too.

combined income of around 60k. 2 children (10+7). Monthly mortgage £650 and about £115k left on the mortgage. Childcare bills still high as eldest is disabled and can’t be left so we will have care fees for life if both of us want to stay working.

house is a small 3 bed semi d. Bought 7 years ago for £125k, would probably sell for around £190k now.

id love a bit more space, especially outside and as the kids get bigger but can’t take the risk of overstretching ourselves. If we lost our lovely childminder one of us would have to give up work to care for eldest. So we are being strict with ourselves in making sure that worst case scenario, whatever commitments we have can be survived on one income if necessary.

We are through now but always put a third of our income to the mortgage.

It's worth thinking about how future proof your smaller extension would be. If it's likely to meet your needs in, say, ten years time, then go for it. But if there's a chance you'll wish you'd extended across two storeys, perhaps it's better to wait and review in a year's time before deciding. Your income may be vastly different by then.
Also, your DC's friends' parents' houses are irrelevant. If you're probe to comparing, get poorer friends 😊

They can get loans to pay for university and jobs. Yea you have to top them up but I couldn’t afford to subsidise 2 adults living costs outside the home

Oh they'll take the max loans for sure but there's still a significant gap. This is a few years away though, right now they're 13/10 and my 13 year old is way more expensive than when she was a baby - eats twice as much as me and needs everything all the time!

Household income 85k, monthly mortgage payment £1345. Two adults, two teenagers. We made the leap 18 months ago to get a larger house in a better area. For us, it’s been worth it - no regrets. Our monthly payment almost doubled to do this, and it does limit our discretionary spending somewhat. It comes down to what you value the most. Is the house the most important thing to you? We’re a family of homebodies so maximum comfort within our living space was far more important than say, for example, travel, which we’re not too fussed about.

£115k gross income. House worth approx £480k, £110k left on mortgage, £1050 pm repayments. 2 kids age 13/18. 4 bed detached SW England

We have a combined income of 94k plus overtime and bonuses. Our mortgage is £125k on a £240k 5 bed house (up north), monthly repayments are £670.

We have a lovely house in a less lovely area, however it's where we grew up and we are happy here.

We earn about £100k ish a year. Bit more complicated as income is a mix of salary and dividends from a limited company. I have usually always been employed and then Dh and I both directors of our family business.

Our house cost a bit over £800k. 5 bedroom detached house on 5 acres. We had a lot of equity as a deposit, so mortgage just shy of £500k (it’s probably around upper 300s now). £1700 pcm, which is not far off what people are paying in rent for 2 bedroom terraced houses around here.

We are in a comfortable position because we have a decent amount of equity and we both have the business to fall back on, for example, when I was made redundant. We have a good LTV and a very good interest rate (which will go up when we re-mortgage, but we will have paid a lot down by then). We don’t live in a ridiculously expensive area though and we don’t have huge outgoings otherwise. No childcare anymore, no car finance, no commutes.

solo parent of 2 kids on around £48k. Only got around 50k left on mortgage on a £220k property. Made my peace I’ll never be able to size up as much as I’d love to.
Most of their friends live in bigger homes but I’d rather have my mortgage paid off by my early 50’s.

We’re a similar income. Older though, and nearing the end of our term so our monthly fees are £560 but we overpay to £750. £53k outstanding. House is probably work 480k

our house is a tiny semi. Same bedrooms as you plus a downstairs bathroom, lounge and open plan kitchen/diner. We built a garden room which has added space.

we live reasonably well, with a holiday in Europe each year plus weekends away. 2 cars bought outright years ago (both 10+yrs old).

our mortgage payments are reasonably low, we’ve been able to save quite a bit and will be able to cover DD’s uni costs.

i went through times of thinking we have a far less wealthy-looking lifestyle to our peers. I thought we should upgrade. But I’m glad we didn’t.

We could have borrowed up to £300k but only used £115.

Kept our payment circa £750 and enabled us to overpay.

Same income. I wouldnt go higher than that tbh, but I am a cautious borrower and comprimised on size for a good location.

110k income, mortgage £550 pm bought 15 years ago with large BOMAD deposit.

4 bed semi suburbs of a large northern city

Such a range of experiences
Argh, I know it is totally down to individual circumstances , just so torn

The most sensible thing for us is to stay put for now, as we spend a lot/like to buy what we want, haven’t been overpaying, neither of us is great with money, and we want a second DC. We are both social people also so days/nights out and events. This means we likely need our spare money to keep enjoying this.
I know I either need to tighten up and prioritise housing and finances, or put up and shut up and enjoy what I have! I just feel very conflicted and stuck!

I really think you should hold on for a bit and see what happens. If you have another baby and go part time things will be quite different already. Then buying a bigger house is a lot of change at once before you see how it really looks. The kids won’t need much space for years yet.

The "making peace with it" was our hardest part once we made the decision not to extend. But now I feel a sense of freedom, not realising how stressed I had been at the prospect of stretching our finances to the limit.
Once we knew what our plan was, we replaced things that weren't working for our space, eg, furniture from previous homes that was too big/small/didn't fit a space and that made a huge difference. We had lived for years with the old things because we'd known we were going to do work on the house so we'd kind of talked ourselves into needing more rooms because nothing worked/fitted. But once we had clever storage and furniture that fitted into spaces properly, it made the same size house feel bigger and work so much better for us.

Moving to North West from SE where i’m renting. Earn 73k (single income household) and mortgage is 300k, £1550 a month, which is similar to my rent. Kids all young adults now, only one at home but will be going to uni.

Wow, I must be on a different planet 😆

Ex and I bought my house for £65K almost nine years ago. Three bed end terrace with a tiny back yard, needed a new kitchen and eventually, new bathroom (that we remortgaged for).
Ex and I split up, I bought him out but due to interest rate rises and a big increase in the house's value (now roughly £120K), I'm now paying around £650 per month. It was half that when we were together.

Here's the kicker; I only earn £31K per year. With some serious budgeting, I'm surviving and even saving a small amount, but it's tough going. There's no room to expand my hours or do overtime at work, and I can't live with other people any more so won't have a lodger. No kids though, which is probably why I'm just getting by, but there are plenty of times where it feels like I'm just hanging on by my fingernails.

130k combined, 65k left on a terraced house that suits. It would be nice to move and a have a bit more space, but we are not financially stretched whatsoever and that is worth more to us at the moment.