Furious at ds work dismissal

[OneGreyBiscuit]

This is more has my 19 year old ds employers been unreasonable. He's just been sacked for being unreliable. For context - he accepted a new job about a month ago. He informed them of where he lives which is about a forty minute train journey away. He is a few minutes late everyday because of the trains and they said they were ok with it. He's just come off holiday (which he informed them of) and went back today. He was sent an email before today telling him to get an earlier train so he's on time. Fair enough, so he did and would've continued doing. At 9 he was called into a meeting to tell him his contracts been terminated for unreliability. He was only informed of getting an earlier train from today, so how can they dismiss him like this? If he continued to get the later train and continued being late then I'd understand but they've not even given him a chance. I'm absolutely furious. And to add insult to injury he still had to pay for his waste of time and money train fare this morning.

Exactly this. Some people on AIBU can be downright spiteful for no reason but honestly I think most people can agree that not being late for work is a standard thing. Especially in this climate of 200 people wanting to apply for one job.

I do think people are trying to help you understand that being on time for work is essential for your son’s benefit.

You are re-enforcing his unreasonable work behaviour by being furious. In what world can someone be late for work every day? I was probably late for word less than a handful of times in 40+ years.
Start parenting by giving proper guidance.

Don’t rise to the bait OP. He’s 19. This experience won’t even be worth a second thought in the future. He will get another job, don’t be hard on him or yourself.
Most teenagers have issues in their first few jobs, not the saints on here but in real life. He’ll find something better.
It’s shit but it happens. He’s had a blip.

I can take constructive criticism but all I've experienced is bitching. And what questions have I ignored? I've put everything I know, I didnt go to work with him and hold his hand, so I don't know if he was good at the job or he was lying about what was said about being late

You need to get a grip OP and fast. You are not doing your DS any favours by making a big drama out of this. It was not a good job fit; these things happen. You should move on and help your DS move on asap. In a few years, when DS has long moved on to a more suitable job, you will either laugh or shrug when looking back on this.

How late did the later train make him?
X

What kind of work is this? If this is a direct customer facing role, he deserved it. And deserved it regardless if it was directly brought up

Yes, I hope you're right

There are plenty of responsible teenagers who travel greater distances and still arrive at work on time 🙄

Who said he can show up late (boss or colleague), whether he makes the time back, how much earlier the earlier train would have got him there, just to name a few. And you’ve had plenty of non bitchy comments, just because people think YABU it doesn’t mean they are ALL bitching, they just don’t agree with you. And some people have agreed with you anyway! Sounds like you are just angry in life to be honest.

Did he really need a formal warning to realise that catching an earlier train would actually mean he would get to.work on time after being late for work every single day in a new job.......?! FFS 🙄🙄

My DS's first job was at a tuition centre and he'd come early to set up the tables and chairs for the session.

You can just leave you know.

God almighty no wonder there are so many useless Gen Z-ers in workplaces if this is how they are being parented. I wouldn’t say your son deserved to be sacked, as it’s not a nice thing to happen to anyone, but it’s entirely on him that he has been.

True.

He should chalk this one up to experience and ensure he sorts his timekeeping out going forward.

Also OP it might help if you drummed into him.aswell rather than making all these excuses for him.

Get up earlier. Be on time. It's really not hard.
X

Oh that's nice, how lovely to have such a perfect child

There is also plenty who make mistakes in early employment who learn from mistakes and go on to have a successful work record.

OP is not thinking clearly. A good kicking isn’t always the same approach to the thread even in AIBU when someone is highly distressed.

OP, this thread is not going to improve. Hide it, go get a coffee and look after yourself.

keep your eye roll to yourself.

You’re just being completely nasty for no reason now. In fact the only nastiness and horrible comments on the entire thread have been from you.

And now in his graduate job he stayed late today till 7pm to get some tasks done.

Oh really, you can poke a bear for so long. You just said leave the thread which I'm going to as I have to get up at 2.40 am to go to work but I have no punctuality and have instilled this into my ds apparently. So goodnight, keep the lovely comments coming, hope it makes everyone feel better

Honestly without being goady what did you expect? Did you really think anyone would agree that his former employer was wrong?
He couldn't even be bothered to turn up on time during his probation ofcourse its his fault.
And yes you making excuse after excuse and being "furious" at his former employer instead of accepting his sacking is entirely his fault will get you told your part of the problem because guess what you are.
Take this as a learning lesson for both of you, him to get his arse into work on time in future jobs and you to stop blaming everyone and everything else for your not perfect sons poor choices and work ethic

This is true, I think. During Covid, a young person I know had a job making up the Covid testing kits. He kept on being 5 minutes late and his boss said ‘right, I’m letting you go’. Cue a massive hissy fit and swearing from him.

😘😘😘

Haven't RTWT, but OP, from what I've read, YOU are the one being gratuitously nasty. What don't you understand about the comments that teaching punctuality is an important part of parenting? "Just a little bit late"? It's like being a little bit pregnant ...he could have prevented the situation by taking precautions.

Take it on the chin like a woman, OP. Your son stuffed up, was a bad fit for the role and was let go...as was the right of his employer.

I really eacapes me why you are so invested in his employment--let him learn from his mistakes.

Op I've read your update. The job was in finance...so something where professional behaviour, sticking to the rules and being accountable for your actions is completely written into the job requirements.

Now the holiday is a complete red herring, pre booked holiday, yes obviously they accepted that he would have the time off.

But late every day? Come on. You have to see that is simply not acceptable. I could almost understand if he'd been working there years and suddenly the train timetable changed. But he took the job knowing it's 40 minutes away.

And the biggest kick in the nuts for the employer. They ask him to get an earlier train and guess what...he can!! Even if someone said a few minutes late was acceptable, your son had to see that the lack of effort/professionalism was never going to do him any favours. Imagine you were his boss and you're going to talk to him about his lateness and ask him to get an earlier train and he does it's going to really piss you off.

As a former manager I can tell you i would have sacked him too.
Lack of punctuality shows a poor work ethic, causes productivity issues and builds resentment in the team.
Have you ever worked in management or any professional roles?