I was seeing a guy for about 15 months. The relationship was always a secret, and i put that down to us being from different cultures. I didn't have a problem with the difference in cultures.
A few weeks ago we had a row. I had gone to see him, I had a really bad headache, he asked for sex, I said no as I didnt feel the greatest. Things progressed and I then agreed to it, but then he told me I had to use a certain bathroom incase his friend invited himself into his flat as he had a key. This made me think. If his friend could walk in on me in the bathroom, he could walk in on me in the bedroom, so I said forget it, and we drank coffee. Then he pulls his trousers and boxers down.
I was disgusted, I went off on one, because he clearly didnt respect my answer and was trying to get it anyway. He made an excuse that he did it because he was hot.
I walked out, told him I had enough of being a dirty little secret, and that I was disgusted that he didnt respect my answer when I had said no, and blocked him.
I ended up unblocking him a week later as his parcel had arrived at my home. He had already been at my door twice and I didn't answer. I text him and asked him to collect his parcel, he apologised, and then I felt sorry for him as I know he hasn't got any family and I know he's lonely. I know he also has no way of doing his washing, and I felt bad about that.
I explained to him that I wasnt happy about being a dirty little secret, I asked him why, and he just kept on avoiding the question. I also made it clear I didn't like the fact he didnt respect my answer. I said we can be friends, but thats it.
He still keeps ringing me non stop, its too much, i have things to do. On the phone he'll keep saying "love you so much" "you look very nice" and ive told him its not appropriate and he still does it.
He wanted me to order him more things to my house and I tried to encourage him to order the things himself (he seems incapable of doing anything), and he went off on one calling me a bad friend, saying he's got no one etc, and it made me feel bad.
He drives for a living a drives past my house, and told me he slows down and he can see my house, and sees when I have visitors.
He keeps asking to come round for coffee, and I keep making excuses. He now wants us to go out to a pub, but I don't want to.
He keeps trying to offer to buy me things, which I have said no. Ive never been influenced by money, nor will I ever be.
He kept saying he'd pay for a tattoo for me, I said no about 20 times. The next day he said he was going to take me to the tattoo shop and I snapped at him as I had already said no, and he just won't take no for an answer.
Today he's dropped his laundry off on my doorstep, and there was a bag with chocolate, alcohol, and other bits in. I had already said that I didnt want them when he said he said was going to buy them. I had said no, and yet again he didnt listen. I know its probably kindness, but I just dont want them, and I dont want to encourage him.
At the moment I'm feeling really anxious about the whole situation. I have no idea what to do, and im really an empathetic kind of person, but I just can't take this any more. Ive made it clear I don't want a relationship with him, and the way he won't take no for an answer is making me uncomfortable.
Am I overreacting about all of this? I honestly don't know what to do. I feel sorry for him, but I just can't keep being hounded like this anymore.