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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

OTT attitudes to World Cup

46 replies

Idontpostmuch · Today 13:18

AIBU to think the OTT attitudes to the World Cup are a touch unhealthy, almost sinister. At the end of the England Argentina semi final there was a young child crying. Surely something's wrong when children are having the importance of winning rammed into them at an early age. The team went all out and gave it their best. One team had to lose but they had done amazingly well getting to the semi final. All a bit creepy.

OP posts:
HRTQueen · Today 14:47

januaryjanuarydone · Today 14:39

I have no problem with small children (or grown ups) getting emotional about sport. It doesn’t mean that they can’t get emotional about other things, but sport, and especially football, are extremely precious and meaningful to many people.

I absolutely do have an issue with those men that then go home and abuse their wives and kids because their football team lost, or those who think it’s ok to send abuse and threats to the footballers who lost.

A small child crying at the football is not “creepy” and that is a very weird way of looking at it.

We all, unless we are violent, racist, abusive thugs, have issues with men being violent or sending death threats, racist abuse etc

the football is just an excuse, lets not allow them to hide behind its my passion for football that made me do this

NuffSaidSam · Today 14:51

You think a child crying because their football team lost is creepy?

I do think some people are OTT with their football support, but I have to say a small child crying when their team lose is not really an example of that.

randomchap · Today 14:53

SooPanda · Today 13:50

Oh and don’t forget a fair few of those men being paid so much money to kick a ball have been accused of abuse and rape.

Edited

Any more than in the general male population?

Also they aren't being paid to kick a ball. They are entertainers bringing in millionsand millions for the companies that employ them. Why shouldn't they get paid well.

Cla7 · Today 14:54

I’m with you OP. I enjoy watching the World Cup, I cheer on my team and hope they win, but if they don’t, it’s an ‘oh well’ and life goes on, I don’t give it further thought the next day. That’s how I want my child to enjoy football when he’s old enough.

Sartre · Today 14:54

Football is very tribal and people feel protective of their tribe. When they lose it feels personal.

MargaretMeldrew · Today 14:57

I have no interest in football and don’t tend to get emotional about the sports I do enjoy. But I cry at loads of stuff that wouldn’t bother anyone else. It’s completely normal to get carried away with the build up and excitement, then feel a sense of anti climax. Crying is simply releasing a valve. They’ll all be back living their normal lives again today. Or maybe tomorrow! Let them have their moment of disappointment.

MixedFeelingsNoFeelings · Today 14:59

Couldn't agree more OP. I think there's something unhealthy about grown people having so much invested in a sporting event that they're in performative ecstasies and agonies. Sure, people are happy when their team wins and disappointed when they lose - the performative bit is the sheep-like moves:

Our goal = throw beer in air, grab nearest person and jig around
Their goal = hands on head, stare ahead bleakly, or look around disbelievingly
Win match = lose shit entirely
Lose match = be inconsolable, cry, say 'gutted' a lot.

It's cringe in adults. And when children pick up that this is how they're supposed to react, yeah, creepy's the right word as far as I'm concerned.

Personally I wouldn't take my kid to any event where there's going to be armed police and drunk men shouting, but I get that lots of people see it differently. But it's the weird emotional vibe - that's increased since men learnt it's bad to hide their emotions - that I think is wrong for kids.

Younger ones can't deal with their own big emotions, let alone those of a crowd of adults proud to be barely in control of themselves. Of course the kids will copy the adults to fit in, and look as if they're fine with it. But I do wonder what repeated exposure to this behaviour could be doing to them pyschologically.

LadyGemBelleoftheBall · Today 14:59

Yes, YABU and need to learn the definition of the word 'creepy'.

januaryjanuarydone · Today 14:59

HRTQueen · Today 14:47

We all, unless we are violent, racist, abusive thugs, have issues with men being violent or sending death threats, racist abuse etc

the football is just an excuse, lets not allow them to hide behind its my passion for football that made me do this

That’s what I was trying to say. Don’t let passion for a team and as sense of loss when they lose get conflated with violent male abusers. Abusers will abuse whatever the excuse.

QuintadosMalvados · Today 14:59

It's no more of a stupid thing to get excited about than anything else.
I'm expected to go and look at hotels to stay at for a wedding I've zero interest in.

I don't think the victory was mine, but it was a great display of stoicism and nerve by the Argentinians.

Men tend to think the victory is their's. Now I don't get that at all.
But it's always great to see a positive display of male agility, power, nerve and focus.

You sound really smug about your dh not liking football. Is he passionate about anything?

ParsleySageToiletDuckAndBinBags · Today 15:00

Lots of people have a healthy but grounded passion for football; but for many, it really is a religion. Declaring your lifelong allegiance, making it a major part of your identity, worshiping the heroes (and talking about them as if they're your best mates), singing special songs, wearing the uniform, claiming that 'we' did whatever the small number of people on the field actually did.

The one that gets me is people talking about adults being 'devastated' about not winning. Not just disappointed but devastated. Surely you're devastated when you lose something you already had - like if your house burns down or you're made redundant; or when you can't have something normal that you reasonably expected that you always would. How is it devastating to enter a competition with 48 entrants and to be one of the 47 who don't win? Are these people also devastated every time they play the lottery and their numbers don't come up?!

SquigglePigs · Today 15:07

A kid crying for a minute because their team lost is perfectly normal.

My 7 yr old sometimes has a few tears if her favourite contestant on MasterChef or Gladiators gets eliminated.

It's normal for small children to still be learning to manage their emotions.

That said, I do think the countrywide football hysteria is a little much!

AspiringChatBot · Today 15:09

I find it quaint that fans so often disproportionately support the team that happens to represent their home country, and then generally lose interest if that team is knocked out. Why not support the team that is technically best, is playing especially well in this competition, or is most enjoyable to watch? Many of the athletes are not even from the country they represent, but almost everyone is from Earth.

januaryjanuarydone · Today 15:16

AspiringChatBot · Today 15:09

I find it quaint that fans so often disproportionately support the team that happens to represent their home country, and then generally lose interest if that team is knocked out. Why not support the team that is technically best, is playing especially well in this competition, or is most enjoyable to watch? Many of the athletes are not even from the country they represent, but almost everyone is from Earth.

I say this as someone who is not a huge football fan, you’re really missing the point of the tribal nature of football and that it’s much more than just appreciating top class athletes.

firstofallimadelight · Today 15:18

We talked about the possibility they could lose and i pointed out that still puts them in 3rd or 4th of 200+ countries and territories. Thats an amazing accomplishment there is far too much emphasis on coming first.

i saw a awful meme saying how the person feels sorry for all the women who will be attacked / hit because England lost. That’s a horrific thought.

Preppingforsummer · Today 15:20

My DS cried. It took me by surprise in all honesty as he holds a season pass and is used to watching his home team lose. I think because the goals came so close to the end DS has started to believed we may win. I don't think it is creepy and we didn't particularly hype him up either way.

Mygardenshedisfallingdown · Today 15:38

"There are no losers, we are all winners." Drivel uttered by my neighbour when her child loses a game he is playing in their garden with friends.
He usually has a massive tantrum.

SeaShellsSanctuary1 · Today 15:41

It's a big deal for those who love playing or watching the sport
I think it more weird that people dont understand that others can be passionate about an interest

ineedaheronow · Today 15:42

I’m 27 and I cried. It’s football, it means more.

ParsleySageToiletDuckAndBinBags · Today 16:02

januaryjanuarydone · Today 15:16

I say this as someone who is not a huge football fan, you’re really missing the point of the tribal nature of football and that it’s much more than just appreciating top class athletes.

Don't you think it's weird on a national level, though - how many people passionately support teams that are based in (and often named after) a city that is many miles from where they live, and with which they have no geographical connection whatsoever?

Interestingly, it invariably seems to be a handful of the very biggest, most successful and most prominent teams that these people choose to support. You don't get many people who've always lived in London who support Derby County; or born-and-bred Geordies who support Plymouth Argyle.

I still remember when there was a local Derby and seeing Everton fans on TV holding banners welcoming LFC fans to Merseyside!

ineedaheronow · Today 16:40

ParsleySageToiletDuckAndBinBags · Today 16:02

Don't you think it's weird on a national level, though - how many people passionately support teams that are based in (and often named after) a city that is many miles from where they live, and with which they have no geographical connection whatsoever?

Interestingly, it invariably seems to be a handful of the very biggest, most successful and most prominent teams that these people choose to support. You don't get many people who've always lived in London who support Derby County; or born-and-bred Geordies who support Plymouth Argyle.

I still remember when there was a local Derby and seeing Everton fans on TV holding banners welcoming LFC fans to Merseyside!

No, not really. A lot of people support their dad’s team.

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