Advice on school friendship issue

[Livefreely]

Advice needed! I have a 9 year old daughter, she’s finding it tough at the moment with her friendship group, often in tears because of not very nice things being said by other girls, feeling left out etc. ( DH and I have tried hard to help her break out of this group but she is very reserved and can be quiet and simply doesn’t have the confidence to move into other friendship groups.
we have booked some time at a holiday club with a friend outside school. They are looking forward to spending time with each other but a mum of her school friend keeps asking what dates we are going to said club so she can organise the same dates. My daughter ( and I) were looking forward to having a break from school and the girls and friendship issues and now I don’t know what to do!
AIBU to want her to have a break from it all and avoid the situation?

Twos company, three’s a crowd. This might not go well. I’d maybe try and explain your DD is going with someone else but then this school child will feel shunned. Shame it wasn’t kept quiet! I’d chat to the mum if her DD is actually not a problem. If she is, you might have to be evasive. Oh dear.

I wondered how you got on @Livefreely I'm going through a really similar situation with DD, same age. She has a lot of anxiety, really lacks confidence and has been really struggling with school lately. Last week DD told me she didn't want to see anyone from her friendship group over summer because she doesn't have any friends at school. I've tried to find out why she thinks this but she gets really upset. So I've decided to take a step back and not ask questions and let her talk when she's ready. Like you @Livefreely I won't organise anything with the other girls from her group over the summer to give her a break. DD has been so much happier in the few days she has broken up from school. I'm a bit worried that DD will feel even more isolated when she goes back to school as the other girls will be meeting up all the time over the holidays, but I think she needs to have a break and hopefully find a new friend when she gets back to school.

I think this is one of those situations where it would have been best kept quiet
that said I’d be honest with the other Mum and say that there’s been some issues etc etc as maybe she isn’t aware? And I personally would want to know
3 girls not 2 Is never a good mix either

id ignore the messages and hope that the club is full or just say “oh we haven’t really decided yet we’ll play it by ear as I need to have some annual leave authorised etc etc etc”

Perhaps just be vague and she’ll feel awkward to keep asking ? On other hand , this other girl obviously wants to be with your daughter so could be good to solidify without others from school in the mix ?

Also , to all those that feel that others are constantly meeting up , this is honestly not the case. Especially as holiday goes on and ppl go away etc

Tell her the wrong dates.