Old (male) friends has turned up wife has left him and DP doesn't like it

Eve34 · 2008-06-25T15:51:51+00:00

Title says it all. My oldest friend who I have not seen in a few years has got in touch and needs a bit if TLC, his wife of 8 years has told him it is over. He is crushed. He lives along way away so we are in touch on MSN. All above board nothing to get worried about DP is sulking. I know from his point of view it is a bit out of the blue, but I can not get it across to him that he has to trust me and understand that nothing is going on here. DP works away in the Navy, I hear nothing from him for days and know he is along side having a good time, and I don't get all prissy about it. AIBU???????????????????

JackandSawyersgirl · 25/06/2008 16:56

No YANBU!
Its only talking on MSN for goodness sake.
Let him sulk.
Mine thought i wanted to get back with my ex BF from when I was 15 cos he's messaged me on blinking facebook!
Men - so insecure!

Kimi · 25/06/2008 16:58

Do you think your DH thinks that your friend is looking for more then friendship?

Original poster

Eve34 · 25/06/2008 17:01

I have tried to explain to him that He is so in love with his wife that he is crushed by this, and wants her back in his life. He just wants a friend right now, who he can trust and who will listen.
I am just hurt that DP doesn't trust me to do the right thing. I do not want this to come between us, but I am also not prepared to back down on this.

OP posts:

Original poster

Eve34 · 25/06/2008 17:01

I have tried to explain to him that He is so in love with his wife that he is crushed by this, and wants her back in his life. He just wants a friend right now, who he can trust and who will listen.
I am just hurt that DP doesn't trust me to do the right thing. I do not want this to come between us, but I am also not prepared to back down on this.

OP posts:

Original poster

Eve34 · 25/06/2008 17:01

I have tried to explain to him that He is so in love with his wife that he is crushed by this, and wants her back in his life. He just wants a friend right now, who he can trust and who will listen.
I am just hurt that DP doesn't trust me to do the right thing. I do not want this to come between us, but I am also not prepared to back down on this.

OP posts:

Original poster

Eve34 · 25/06/2008 17:01

I have tried to explain to him that He is so in love with his wife that he is crushed by this, and wants her back in his life. He just wants a friend right now, who he can trust and who will listen.
I am just hurt that DP doesn't trust me to do the right thing. I do not want this to come between us, but I am also not prepared to back down on this.

OP posts:

Original poster

Eve34 · 25/06/2008 17:01

I have tried to explain to him that He is so in love with his wife that he is crushed by this, and wants her back in his life. He just wants a friend right now, who he can trust and who will listen.
I am just hurt that DP doesn't trust me to do the right thing. I do not want this to come between us, but I am also not prepared to back down on this.

OP posts:

Original poster

Eve34 · 25/06/2008 17:01

I have tried to explain to him that He is so in love with his wife that he is crushed by this, and wants her back in his life. He just wants a friend right now, who he can trust and who will listen.
I am just hurt that DP doesn't trust me to do the right thing. I do not want this to come between us, but I am also not prepared to back down on this.

OP posts:

Original poster

Eve34 · 25/06/2008 17:01

I have tried to explain to him that He is so in love with his wife that he is crushed by this, and wants her back in his life. He just wants a friend right now, who he can trust and who will listen.
I am just hurt that DP doesn't trust me to do the right thing. I do not want this to come between us, but I am also not prepared to back down on this.

OP posts:

micci25 · 25/06/2008 17:02

are you just in touch via msn? offer to save your convos so that dp can read them if he wishes too.

i had something similar but it was an ex who was quite seriuos, flat togther and all!! so i can understand why dp was bothered, but once he knew that there was nothing going on and i offered to save what we chatting about he was fine about it. though it was a different matter when actually meeting up with him was mentioned. even though it would have been in dps local where he knows every one so if anything untoward went on dp would have known about it before i even got home!! not that anything would have happened of course!

no imo YANBU, i have loads of male friends and would never let dp dictate to me who i could and couldnt speak to. but if he feels mlore reassured you are less likely to argue so just offer to save your messages. there is an option on msn that saves all your chat into a file.

Kimi · 25/06/2008 17:03

I think your DH is worried that your friend might want more then you can give, also if he is away a lot that cant really help.
I think a friend is a friend no matter the gender and if they need help then help

Original poster

Eve34 · 25/06/2008 17:30

sorry DS pressed the send button a few times there. Thank you for that ladies. I know it looks odd to him, and he is home for the foreseeable future right now, so not going to be getting up to no good whilst he is away.
This is a friend in need and I want both of us to reach out to him and his daughter.

OP posts: