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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To hire a cleaner?

4 replies

helpmyclean · 10/07/2026 16:36

I’m having a minor disagreement with my DH over whether we should hire a cleaner or not.

I work full time in a very competitive industry, often needing to do well over full time hours. I’m reasonably well paid for this, but it is still a junior position so not mega bucks.

DH works a standard full time job, less well paid but obviously more consistent hours etc.

We don’t have any DC, just two cats.

I really struggle to keep on top of the house work. DH does do some jobs, but he’s really poor at seeing or proactively dealing with more “deep clean” issues. For example, he’ll often cook dinner for me to come home to work to as I’ve finished late, but the kitchen will be full of dishes everywhere. If prompted, he’ll clean up, but he wouldn’t just get on with it. Similar, he always takes care of the cats litter trays but leaves the poo bags by the door. He’ll fill and empty the dishwasher but never cleans the filter etc.

I tend to do the deeper clean aspects of the house, like behind the toilet or polishing all the glass, cleaning skirting boards etc. As mentioned above, I do also have to ask DH to do things (but he does then happily do it without any issue at all).

I just feel like I have no time to relax as something always needs doing.

My argument is that we both work full time, have a reasonable income, and therefore we should get a cleaner for a couple of hours every other week ish just to help with those more annoying jobs.

DH thinks it’s a waste of money, our house is always fine and I’m being fussy wanting deeper clean stuff done so regularly.

We’re at a bit of a standstill of DH saying he doesn’t want a cleaner but me being desperate for one. I suppose I could pay for it from ‘my’ funds rather than ‘joint’ funds, but that hardly seems fair when it’s a household expense.

so Aibu to want a cleaner?

OP posts:
Pedant61 · 10/07/2026 16:44

By all means hire a cleaner - you are working, so you are providing employment for someone else. It's a win-win.
But I'm not sure anyone needs to clean skirting boards, tbh, so you will have to be quite specific about what you want them to do, and allocate them the time (and funds) accordingly.
I always found it useful when my cleaner also did laundry and ironing - made life so much easier.

PeonyBulb · 10/07/2026 16:44

Go for it

CarpetofBluebells · 10/07/2026 16:46

I also say go for it. And I would expect a cleaner to clean skirting boards, they get filthy especially when you have pets!

helpmyclean · 10/07/2026 16:46

Pedant61 · 10/07/2026 16:44

By all means hire a cleaner - you are working, so you are providing employment for someone else. It's a win-win.
But I'm not sure anyone needs to clean skirting boards, tbh, so you will have to be quite specific about what you want them to do, and allocate them the time (and funds) accordingly.
I always found it useful when my cleaner also did laundry and ironing - made life so much easier.

I only really like to go over them this time of year as the cats shed like mad and it seems to cling to the skirting!

I’d definitely want to be clear about specific tasks we’d want doing as obviously some are much easier for us to do (eg emptying dishwasher) and some I’d prefer not to do (eg cleaning tiles)

I didn’t realise that some would do laundry etc, that’s really helpful as that would be a big weight off!

OP posts:
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