AIBU to question press ups being used as punishment at my son's sports club?

[CyanCrow]

Wondering if I am unreasonable to be concerned about this or if it is normal. At an extra curricular sports club today in 30 degree heat my son, was tidying up kit. He did it in a way one of the leaders felt could damage the kit (I think rolling something up before unplugging something) which I am sure they would have been told about before and, therefore, he, quite rightly, was told off. However the coach made him do 40 press ups as a punishment as he said "he didn't want anyone else doing it that way" and "wanted to make an example of him". My son is a good kid, superb school reports, not a trouble maker, did not want me to mention it, but I am a secondary school teacher and we wouldn't be allowed to do this in school nowadays. The head coach was away - apparently they don't do this type of thing when the head coach is there which makes me wonder.... Is it ok to do this or does it cross a line into physical punishment/abuse of power? Please advise!

Woah that’s not acceptable in this heat!!!

I would listen to your son and drop it. The coach was a dick for doing it but he could make things worse for your son if you get involved. Let him take his punishment.

At DS1s football training they have to run a lap of the field of they mess about too much (10 year old boys)

BUT they agreed it with the coaches at the start of the term! 40 press ups seems excessive.

Your son is being taught respect and mistakes etc have consequences.
sounds perfectly reasonable’punishment’. Yes it’s warm but it’s not the end of the world.
i assume your boy didn’t pass out or anything awful? Kids do need to learn respect in this day and age. Sadly the nanny state we live in nowadays we are not allowed to dish out reasonable punishment

hope he is ok

Maybe 5 or 10 to make a point. But 40 is way too excessive, even in regular temperatures let alone this year.

You don't say how old or what the sport is. If they are 16/17/18 and would usually do 50-100 press ups as a warm up, then maybe 40 is ok. But I'm pretty sure that's not going to be the case

If they only do it when head coach is not there, that smacks of them knowing they shouldn't be doing it.

I don't see the problem kids need discipline its good for them to many bratty kids due to soft parenting now. That isn't aimed at you op as your kid sounds fine but plenty aren't and they can't have one rule for one and one for another

How old is your DS? For a teenager I'd think this is ok in general but it was a bit hot for it today. How did your DS feel about it? Provided he's old enough I wouldn't speak to the coaches myself, but advise him to speak to them and say he thought it was excessive if he feels it was too much. Then back him up if necessary.

It seems ludicrous to have given any sort of punishment for this very minor transgression - surely all that was needed was for the leader to say “Oi, Jake, I’ve told you before to unplug that before you roll it up. Focus on what you’re doing, please.”

It sounds like he was just on a power trip - and is probably in the wrong job.

Totally Depends on age of your son.

Depends on the coach and type of activity - I think you are overthinking though.

99% of the time complaining about stuff teachers do is not reasonable and is turning your child into an entitled loser.

There are many other ways to achieve that don’t involve adding 40 press ups at the end of a presumably strenuous training session in 30+ heat

I wouldnt send my kids to clubs where people dole out punishments anyway, they're not police officers. If they think your son isnt beahving in the right way and give warnings and he continues, the punishment should be expulsion from the club. Not things like this.

Smacks of military basic training, which is designed to break young men and women down. So yes, I think it's physical abuse, as it's a huge overreaction to not unplugging something and in excessive heat.

Doing that in heat he's unaccustomed to is how healthy kids get heat stroke.

I'd bring that up with the head coach and say you want their punishment policies clarified.

It’s 40 press ups not waterboarding, really don’t see the issue.

Very unreasonable. High numbers of push-ups specifically to exhaustion is a major risk factor for rhabdomylosis. Very ignorant of someone to use this military-style punishment with anyone let alone a young person.

Punishments like this are banned under most safeguarding policies for sports. 5 push ups Id be tempted to ignore, 40 Id be making formal complaint.

Agree!!

id mention it to the Head Coach next time you see them, but also mention DS didn't want you to.

20 normally would be ok, but 40 in this heat, he's lucky your DS didn't tell him to fuck off.

Uncalled for.

They often do this at martial arts clubs etc. Obviously hundreds would be too much but a young fit teen should be able to do 40 press-ups in a few minutes

https://www.theguardian.com/wellness/2026/jun/30/exertional-rhabdomyolysis-cause

This talks about press-ups and how they are one of the most common causes of rhabdo when someone is being pushed way out of their usual sort of zone. In high heat it’s even more risky.

This is why we are continually being referred to as a nation of snowflakes.

YABVU.

And this is the exact problem years ago parents would have said serves you right you will think twice before you do that again. Parents now= how dare anyone punish my little precious boy for doing something wrong I'm going to put a complaint in and ask my son why he didn't tell the coach to just fuck off.

Great! Tomorrow you do training for an hour (in30+) degrees then do 80 pushups. You're an adult 80 isn't a big deal

40 pushups after training in over 30° is dangerous.

perhaps you don't care about kids health but I do

A healthy young person would take less then a minute to do 40 push ups he'll live