Is gaming really that bad ?

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I dont know why I have such a negative connotation I always want to avoid ds from trying it

Hes 4.5 were on holiday and he does love an arcade trip

We have an 'ipad'an amazon one only loaded with films for flights very long drives etc
No games

Dont know if that why he seems so interested?

But i always get so worried he'll get into gaming and not want him to etc

I found gaming and you tube (including kids you tube) had a very negative effect on my children, so no I wouldn’t go down that path

He's 4 and a half. Seriously.

I have older kids and my boys play a lot of online games. Minecraft with friends was a total godsend during Covid as it let them interact with people they were banned from seeing.

Gaming is a hobby/passtime like any other. If you were spending 16 hours a day cleaning your house, working out on a treadmill, doing jigsaws, baking or whatever people would quite rightly say you're taking it to extremes and you need a bit of balance in your life.

And it's not just kids who play video games. Quite partial to a bit of assassin's creed and i'm 53.

I like gaming , my kids like gaming
I would say don't start that young. His brain will be absorbing everything and shaping based on his experiences.

A simple Cbeebies game is fine, a mindless, repetition-rewarding game like Candy Crush would be awful.

He'll likely get given phonics and maths ipad games at school which are designed to build on learning. But he has his whole life to get into big games.

My rule is that you can play them but you need to have other interests too. Some kids I see at Primary are at a total loss on how to entertain themselves without their console.

My 8yo loves Switch games but tbh still isn't really mature enough to be able to turn them off when time's up. (He has an older sibling otherwise wouldn't have access to one!)

Men gaming has some pretty negative connotations. I only started to play console and computer games regularly as a parent, in my late thirties, and I was really surprised by the development of some games that present limited save opportunities. I could be playing for an hour or more without a save opportunity, for example. That was a real shock to me.

A lot of games seemed to be designed by, and for, people that didn't have to worry about such fripperies as, saving a game to go and make meals, do laundry, pause a game and spend time with literally anyone else living in the same house.

It felt so disconnected and so out of touch, and honestly I've been in IT for 25 years, I know what it's like to be occupying a space that isn't designed for me (certainly it wasn't when I joined the industry and improvements have been slowwww.)

In fact I only started playing computer games once I got divorced and had a 50/50 situation and had this empty time without my kids that I needed to fill, beyond relentlessly cleaning the same rooms over and over.

That said... My son plays computer games. He isn't turning into some sort of bedroom-dwelling incel. My partner plays computer games (we often play the same ones!). The past few weeks I've been trying to defeat a particular character and when I managed to do it today, to my own shock, the first person I messaged was my son, and he was thrilled for me.

I don't know if this comment will be helpful or not, but - there are lots of games that allow saving and pausing at regular points, at least providing they are PC-based so that may be something to look at.
Gaming as a family is a great activity and I would recommend it, we have a laugh and help each other figure out how to make progress on a game.
Some games do seem designed to be anti-social (to the people in real life, instead of headset people) and I'd be wary of those.

God he’s tiny! I don’t know a single person who’s said they wish they’d got their child into gaming sooner, do you? At 4 there are so many things he can and should be doing that don’t involve a screen. Trust your gut.

Was great for me, and steered me down the path of a career I would not otherwise have considered and where I am now successful.

It depends on the type of game, though. Some games are educational, some games teach puzzle-solving, rapid decision making or even communication skills and teamwork. Others are purely for entertainment, and can be harmful.

It's a bit like asking if tv/film is good or bad. There's no blanket answer because its just a medium - what actually matters is the specific content.

Mine got addicted to board games which can be pretty expensive.

we used to have whole family rows about some games. We only ever played Carcassone once!

4.5 is young enough that you certainly don’t have to introduce anything, but in my experience, in this increasingly technology and digital driven world, in unavoidable that you will have to navigate it at some point.

It’s tricky, but I think establishing balance with kids is far more healthy and practical than any ‘zero’ hard limits. It only makes the ‘thing’ more desirable and it does not enable them to learn what moderation feels or looks like.

Hi! This post wasn't me saying I want to introduce him, trust me im not, I mean though I panic at any sort of electronic game, we do lots of board games and puzzles which he loves. He's a problem solver

I was asking more generally and as he gets older as I sit and hope he doesnt ask for a nintendo switch at 6 or 7/8 years old then an xbox etc

It was more for general opinions for kids Overall like here weve seen kids who are like 6/7 on Nintendo switches. I'm definitely not introducing him to anything now at this age and want to hold off as long as possible

"Gaming" is a broad spectrum.

I think it is fine, but until the age of 7 or 8, I think it should be a family activity. E.g. sports/party games, that the family play together.

I think there are lots of creative games that develope positive skill when they are old enough - e.g. I love minecraft. And I am happy for my DC to play most games if they are playing together - I have kept all consoles "family owned" and in the living room to encourage that.

I have never allowed roblox (even now, at aged 12) or those shit phone/tablet games full of adverts and designed to be addictive. Never allowed in-app purchases except once a year at Xmas.

Now they are older, I am happy for them to play e.g. fortnite online with friends, but not to speak to strangers.

Agree, @Beer3000

We all play games together! The Lego Star Wars/Harry Potter games, Minecraft, Mario Kart, that sort of stuff. But then DH and I met through gaming so we were always going to be a gaming family DD1 has free access to her Switch, like everything she goes through phases of playing it and then it gets put down for a few weeks.

We don’t really have rules around this stuff, but we’ve found that having always had gaming around, both our kids just kind of self-regulate, they will sometimes have a few days where they play more and then they won’t play again for two weeks. It’s just an activity like all the others to them.

We do love board games too. We have a whole Kallax full of them. And jigsaws!

yes it is. It messed up my DS really badly in a situation where my exH was giving and I was taking away. Steer your DS as clear from it as you can.

I am a gamer. I have a degree in game design. But I am not 4.5 and I wouldn’t have a child that young playing video games. I balance my gaming with work, exercise, social events etc. it’s also a creative outlet for me as I make games as a hobby now rather than as a career.

my DP games with his friends on a night, plays dungeons and dragons with them, and that’s their social thing. All on the pc. But he always makes time for me and it doesn’t take over his life. Some people are completely addicted to it and that’s when it gets to be a problem.
I think as he gets older just put boundaries in place for screen time. Forge other interests with him so he doesn’t just have that one thing.

It depends what sort of gaming.

My 10 year old plays Minecraft with friends and its really creative.

My teen loves gaming but again plays online with friends. Very sociable.

Under 7 years its best to limit screens.

I can't stand seeing toddlers in pushchairs glued to a phone.

I have no interest but within boundaries there’s nothing bad about gaming as such. Mine got into coding and still heads off to coding club once or twice a week at age 12 building his own games. He’s never shown an interest in inappropriately age rated games or overly violent ones. He loves old school games most. I’d rather he was doing a problem solving game than passively watching tv.

he was about 8 when he got a switch and started with Mario social games.