Why can't some people accept some things can't be fixed.

[HolyHannah]

Why can't some people accept that some things can't be fixed?

I keep seeing on threads people saying things like "you need to do something about that" or words to that effect. On a thread about people with unattractive feet wearing sandals, people were saying there's no excuse for it - completely disregarding that some health conditions mean ugly feet and can't be fixed. On another thread some said that another posters pelvic floor issues don't have to be lived with but actually maybe they do, maybe that poster has had all intervention possible and has reached the limit of any improvement.

Those are only 2 recently but there's loads of people on threads who do it constantly. And with no acceptance that not everything can be fixed and even things that can be fixed, can take a really long time.

Clearly frustrated today!

Case in point op, you can’t fix others people’s opinions

Yup. The beauty of believing most things can be fixed is that it gives you loads of opportunities to blame other people when things go wrong.

And that's a lot easier, and more satisfying, than accepting the bleak fact that some things are simply awful and can't be rectified, and it's no one's fault, just a consequence of an uncaring, unjust universe.

Very good point on a wider level (not sure sandal wearing is a good example)

But modern humans, certainly in this country, and all over this forum most of the time think there was a way to resolve most things, 'you need therapy' is a common comment. Like because someone doesnt like something or finds sometning hard, therapy will fix that, just like that, poof, all done and fixed

Medical care is another one, like every illness can be resolved, most long term chronic conditions can just be managed, just managed, it still means someone might be disabled or disadvantaged by it. Not everything can be diagnosed, or discovered or treated.

The inevitable and worse example of this unfortunately is this false belief in 'safeguarding'. You see it where some awful thing has happened as if it could always be prevented. People dont want to believe that these things WILL happen and cant always be prevented. Its to the degree that quite often courts and judges will make comment along this line but its false, Ive seen it in SCR where they will talk about gaps and missed opportunities. Sometimes that is absolutely true, quite often it wouldnt have made one jot of difference, the AR case is one just like that. People genuinely believe that there could have been something to have stopped that, I am not convinced myself.

And no Im not a disbeliever in change, I believe in change and improvement but Im a pragmatist.

Agree about safeguarding, and the thoughtless use of "safeguarding fail!" - as if every situation is black or white, with vulnerable people either safe or not safe.

In fact you can never keep a child 100% safe, short of locking them in the attic. But the thought of entertaining even a small risk is anathema to some people... because they're afraid that if something bad does happen, they'll be blamed. And it's their blame-oriented mindset that has made them feel this way.

Oh yes, definitely agree with safeguarding.

There was a thread while ago from a poster about her daughter's party. One of the attendees was suspected to be being abused or something and one poster was making out like camping out at social services until the child was removed was an appropriate and reasonable thing to do, and not that these things take time, or action may have already been taken.

And the health thing - that was what the sandals comment was about. Some people have ugly feet due to health issues, they have no less right to wear their desired footwear than anyone else and they can't "just" have a pedicure.

Oh I see what you mean about the feet thing, yes.