To apply for 1year PGCE as a lone parent to young DC

[Sarah24x]

Hi all,

Apologies for the long post!

I’m a single to 2 ds (5 and 2). 50/50 custody with xh for ds1 and a lone parent to youngest (his dad disappeared when he was 6 months old and has moved abroad, no contact).

Currently on UC. No family help as they all work full time.

I have always wanted to be a teacher. I was planning on doing a PGCE after finishing my degree but went on to become a cabin crew abroad. Fell pregnant with ds1 and was unable to continue so became a sahm instead.

Anyways, ds1s local school (which is 5 minutes walk away) have just advertised last minute applications for a 1 year PGCE (train to teach) at the primary school starting this September.

I am very interested but the problem is, ds2 has had an awful year with illnesses. He’s due a tonsillectomy in 2 weeks time. Just a few weeks ago he had croup and a chest infection at the same time, currently has HFM, awaiting allergy testing and also suspected hypermobility by the GP.

In some ways, I’m hoping after his tonsils are removed, the infections will subside (his chest infections normally come on a day or 2 after the tonsillitis begins. He was referred for immunology panel but the results came back inconclusive and they decided not to redo him.

Anyways, AIBU to even consider applying for this PGCE? Ideally, with all this going on, next year would be better but the job centre are already pushing me to prepare to go back to work as soon as ds2 hits 3. I’d rather do a profession like teaching which I would enjoy.

I’m aware it’s a very intense program but tbh, I’ve got through the last 2 years on minimal sleep (ds2 has sleep apnea due to the size of his tonsils) so still wakes up around 6 times per night. I guess I’m wondering if I could pull it off and do my planning and nursery assignments on the night times as I’m usually awake anyways.

Any advice appreciated!

I’d wait until your youngest is in school full time and has a stronger immune system. You have no family support so if he’s sick and can’t go to nursery, you’d have to let the school down. I’m sure this would be ok on occasion but it may happen often at his age. Maybe think about being a TA part time in the meantime.

@Sartre thanks for your reply. 😊

That’s what I’m thinking too. In hindsight, I’m hoping once his tonsils are removed this month, the illnesses will subside. Then again, ds1 is rarely ever ill and has always had perfect attendance so I do think ds2 might have a very low immune system.

I did a four year BEd at uni and my best friend there was a widow with two children aged 1 and 3. She survived and so will you. Go for it now.

I wouldn't do it. The training will be fun but being a new teacher and a single mum is a total nightmare. Stress, excessively long hours, and zero flexibility. Plus debt.

Do it. You’ll make it work and having a profession is life transforming compared to being on the dole and will mean far, far better life chances for your children.

Yes it won’t be easy but it will work out. Teaching is such an amazing profession for mums from the perspective of having the school holidays and although hours are longer than the school day there is presumably some flex to leave at hometime some of the time, unlike being stuck in the office till 5.30pm.

Who can you line up as a possible emergency babysitter if needed? Will you qualify for some of the 30 hours a week free childcare?

I’m excited for you!!

Flexibility…. In teaching?!?!

Teaching is not a family friendly job.

Do you have a support network with DS2?

working in a school is great for the holidays when your own children are school age but there isn’t much flexibility at all in general. I am a qualified teacher (and single mum) but work as a TA instead which I love and gives more of a home life balance. Even then though I miss things at school (my head is great and will let people go when possible but it’s not always possible) and rely on a very good support network for when he is ill.

I think the timing would be so much better in another year, but obviously having the opportunity on the spot means it's worth considering.

I think it would be worth making an appointment to talk to the head. Tell them your thinking, and ask their advice. They might know how likely it is that there will be a similar opportunity in a local school next year.

Getting a TA job would be a very useful pre-cursor to a PGCE. You'd find out what it's actually like day-to-day in the classroom, and begin to pick up lots of useful skills and knowledge. That might make the PGCE slightly less stressful when you get to it, too.

Do you have wrap-around care available? You'd need to have your older one in breakfast/after-school club, as well as childcare for the younger one.

I qualified as a teacher while experiencing significant health issues and caring for a parent with dementia. I'm lucky that I had DH to support me however and my DC are older than yours. I had one doing A Levels and one in high school.

It is intense. It is hard work. It takes over. I also wouldn't have it any other way and am happier teaching than I have been in any other job.

No debt either as I did it as an apprentice and was paid a salary.

Most in school training programmes will expect recent classroom experience so why not look at TA or support staff work for a year or two and then progress to PGCE? Doing it now might be manageable but equally, you might end up with too much to handle. Perhaps plan for the next couple of years instead.

Training year and the first year or two are hard work and very intense. Not family friendly or flexible at all.
I love my job but I would not do it in this way with your commitments.

Do it! You can’t base all of your plans on your son having a bad year for Illness. Or you’ll never move forward.

Thanks all for your replies! ☺️

The biggest issue would be that I don’t have any back up emergency childcare should ds be ill (DF works offshore and DM died when I was a child).

I’ve been having a research and the local university now offers Design Technology PGCE and I would get a £20k bursary. Think that may be better as I used to be a graphic designer.

Realistically, I think it may be better to apply for next September. Then it would give me some time to try and get some more experience and hopefully ds2 immune system will have improved by then!

Thanks all again.

Completly off topic, but did they screen for coeliac disease with your youngest - you mention awaiting allergy testing and getting ill all the time? These were some our 'markers' when DD got diagnosed aged 4. She was on antibiotics every few weeks. Since we took her off gluten 3 years ago, she has never been ill apart from the occasional mild cold.

It's really hard to get it diagnosed as young as 2 though, as the immune system responds differently before 2-3 years old so it doesn't always show up.

Other risk factors would be family members with autoimmune conditions such as diabetes, asthma, arthritis, hyperthyroidism.

Thanks so much for your reply! I’ll definitely look into it.

He’s allergic to dairy, suspected egg (had a bad hives reaction at the weekend just touching one) and suspected soya.

He’s had 13 courses of antibiotics this last year including IV. Also his dad has asthma and a strong diabetes history on my side. He also gets petechial rashes when ill and has eczema (not sure if they’re related).

I’ll mention it to the paediatrician on Friday!

🤣

Flex to leave when the children do at home time! That would be the dream, wouldn't it? What you are describing is the contractual hours of a TA. Teaching is not a family friendly profession unfortunately. And then there's the holidays- my own kids achool holidays don't align with my school holidays (not the same county) so there is still childcare to cover.

I completely agree with @Smartiepants79 . I would wait a few years OP. In the meantime get some experience in schools and check out the job market in your area. How often fo DT teacher jobs come up?

You need a thick skin with teaching, nothing is ever good enough, nothing is ever finished. But it can be a very worthwhile vocation.

Good luck!

I would wait if I were you. Definitely do it but wait until child older and more stable. It's full on training to teach and even more intense in your first few years. 20k bursary great for DT but only if you think you'd actually prefer teaching secondary over primary. 20k not worth it if you'll later have regrets. I would focus on getting volunteering experience in DT secondary and primary school.

Eczema is also an auto immune condition, DD suffered badly from this until we took her off gluten at 8 months. She was also intolerant to egg, dairy and soya, although we managed to gradually re introduce them all by time she was 2.

We hasn't even considered coeliac, we took her to gp for tummy pain and poor weight gain, I will be forever grateful to the GP who had an inkling it could be coeliac, and got her tested.

Have a good think about whether you would rather be a primary school teacher or a secondary school DT teacher. They are very different roles. I trained in primary and now teach in secondary (the subject I have my degree in), but my life would have been easier if I’d trained in secondary from the start - not to mention the bursary I’d have been given!
Whatever you choose, good luck! Apply as soon as possible even if you think it’s impossible. You’ll find a way to make it work!

I really wouldn’t advise training in DT, primary is much better for getting a job afterwards. Funding issues has seen lots of schools cut DT down or pull it completely. Unless you are very mobile or based in a big city like London, you will likely struggle to get a job.

Private schools aren’t cutting DT. It’s worth checking around. Last year we took on a trainee DT teacher and paid for her training. Can’t speak for the state sector, but I wouldn’t dismiss DT.