Intrusive thoughts and Social Services

[Tiredboymum22]

Hey, I don’t know whether I’m posting in the right section but I’m really struggling with my mental health at the moment and I’m worried it’ll end up with me being unable to take care of my kids or having social services on my doorstep. I want to seek help from the GP but I’m scared they won’t understand.

I was on Mirtazapine five years ago for OCD but I came off it to have my second child. I was okay for years and then it hit me hard.

Here are things that I’ve worried about lately…

My kids were playing with toy boats in stagnant rain water at a party/event and my 3-year-old put his thumb in his mouth. I rushed them home convinced that if I didn’t bathe him at once he would get sepsis and die. (There was a dead fly in the water!). I made an absolute idiot of myself at the party and felt like a knob the next day. my 3-year-old is still talking about it.

I’ve driven and hit the curb but I convinced myself I hit a child and didn’t notice. I’m no longer driving because it affects my concentration.

I’ve worried about harming family members during a night terror and have barricaded my bedroom door.

I’ve had blasphemous thoughts at church services and thought I was going to hell (even though I’m not really that devout/religious but I’m re-exploring faith).

It’s affecting my appetite and sleep so I know I need to do something. I also have ADHD and I’ve read it’s a common co-occurrence. The last time I was poorly with this we literally did have a social worker at our door because of suicidal ideations.

Has anyone else experienced this? Do I tell the GP everything or do I just say I’m suffering with anxiety?

Can you go back on your medication?

It sounds like your OCD has ramped up and you need some support. I’d strongly urge you to reach out to the GP to speak about this and get some tailored therapy and to go back on medication which will help. I’d recommend ‘overcoming OCD’ by Fiona Challacombe if you have any headspace but you do need to reach out to the GP for support. I empathise, I was very ill with OCD when I was pregnant but with therapy and medication I can control it and it doesn’t affect me day to day.

Get back on an antidepressant ideally an SSRI and self refer to NHS Talking Therapies for CBT just google the link for your area.

Talking therapies very much helped me with my intrusive thoughts.

One thing that helped me is hearing that we have millions of thoughts every day, all day. The intrusive ones are just a few of the many thoughts we have and everyone has them to some degree. The difference was my hyperfixation on the few thoughts I have.

Instead, I should view these thoughts like trains coming into a station. Previously, I'd board the train for a little while in an attempt to control the thought. I'd engage with it for a while and then "hop off" the train thinking that was me mastering these thoughts.

In fact, my engagement meant that they became more frequent and I was having to use these "tools" for larger parts of my day.

So what I need to do is let the train pass me. I'm not boarding. It stops, picks up passengers, but I don't engage. I distract myself while it is at the platform. I had to actually have a list of things I'd do to distract myself, like play a game on my phone or sing a song out loud (only when alone!). Then the train does pull away.

Sometimes it lingers to "regulate the service", but it will pull away if I disengage with it for a long enough time.

Do speak to your GP and ask for CBT but the more advanced/specialised CBT. I did have to wait months for this but it was much better than the basic CBT I have done in 6 week sessions about 3 times over the years.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I have spent many years with the same thoughts. It was at its worst when my children were young. My OCD reappears now and again and it’s awful and debilitating. I spent last year on citalopram after a relapse. I can’t tell you the number of times I worried about contamination, hitting imaginary people while driving or doing something out of character. It’s key to get to the GP.

Medication definitely helps as does good CBT or ACT therapy. I also have ADHD and it feels as if my mind is desperately trying to latch onto anything at times. Social services won’t intervene over rumination and OCD, it’s more important you get help as soon as possible.

If you can afford it, look for a specialist therapy in OCD using CBT or ACT. Even NHS CBT will help. The GP can refer you. The book Brain Lock is very good too and even typing in ‘OCD spike - advice’ into Chat GTP will help with short term advice. It will get better but those of us who suffer from OCD and intrusive thoughts, we need to be proactive or the brain will just run away with itself.

Hope you have a bit of a better day and remember - it can and will get better. You are not along and are a good person.

Your GP should absolutely understand that your OCD is manifesting as intrusive thoughts and you’d likely benefit from medication and cognitive behavioural therapy.
Children’s services will only become involved if the GP perceives you pose a risk of harm to your children. If that were to happen, despite the negative media, Children’s Services would want to support you to improve your mental health. Children’s Services would also see it as a massive strength if you had gone and sought support after recognising you needed it.

Hi OP sorry you are going through this. Please do visit your GP for support. Are you under a psychiatrist? I am for a different MH condition and at my review this week said I could be signed off but for all intents and purposes be kept on their books for 3 years- my 3 monthly reviews would stop but if I needed to see them I contact them and have an appointment. If not could you ask to be referred to the psychiatry team? Maybe ask MN if they can move this post to the MH board. There is a wealth of experience over there x

I have OCD, so I completely understand how dominating and overwhelming the thoughts are; it is both mentally and physically draining living in that state, and I think until you’ve experienced it, it’s hard to understand just how difficult it is. Sending you a big hug.

Please reach out to your GP as soon as possible. You are doing the most sensible and responsible thing for you and your children by doing this. If it offers any reassurance, I was under the crisis team for a year, and neither they or the psychiatrists ever had any safeguarding concerns regarding my children; all they saw was a mum who was trying to get better and had reached out for the support to do so, and they supported me every step of the way. Even if social did get involved, they will see the same, as I’m sure they did last time. If you do get suicidal ideation again, go straight to A & E; they will get you under your local crisis team.

In the meantime, try to focus on Thoughts aren’t Facts. Sending you love and wishing you well ❤️

I would ask for an urgent GP appt and tell your GP everything you have written here.
being open and honest and seeking help will stand in your favour.GP may refer you to specialise teams. if SS get involved it will be to support you and your family. Unless anyone is in danger. Which it doesn’t sound like here.