AIBU to refuse my 15-year-old a late-night concert trip?

[Bubblehubbles]

DD is 15, was at a concert at an outdoor venue, escorted by a friends parents.

Friends parents are very relaxed and allowed them to have a drink or alcohol before the concert. I’m pretty relaxed about alcohol when they hit 16 and I am aware that they may well drink at 15 but I wouldn’t give it to them and I certainly wouldn’t give it to someone else’s child. This is to give some context as to the friends parents boundaries. Friend is a lovely kid and I am generally fond of the parents, but less fond of them doing this.

Apparently last night it was decided that they (2 friends) would go to this venue on wednesday and sit outside the concert and listen to the music with other people who don’t have tickets. This is a train ride away (30 mins or so) and they wouldn’t be home until Midnight.

This seems a bit much for me, somewhere locally I could live with, but a train ride that time of night, with lots of drunk people when you are only 15 seems risky.

Apparently I am absolutely unreasonable, what do others think?

Where is the concert?

Depends. Harry Styles at Wembley - it's a no from me.

It’s in a large park. There will be police around but it’s a train ride away from home

Still depends where!! If it's a decent walk to a large station and it's going to be rammed with thousands all queueing she may miss the last train. If it's a bit less intense than that I'd be more inclined to say yes.

It’s a station where she very easily could be left stranded. It’s a notoriously difficult venue to get out of as public transport is pretty limited

They will likely be moved on from hanging around outside and are very unlikely to be able to hear anything worth travelling that far for! It will just be a bass rumble/vibrations. I would definitely try to discourage this. Why not offer a small kitchen party with the songs so they don't have to miss out completely and you can keep an eye on them

And it’s a long walk through a park - lots of drunk older teens and adults. Im
fine with that, she’s been to several concerts and one only a couple of days ago , but not on their own with no pick ups etc

I’ve offered but they don’t even actually like this band. It’s literally just so they can sit on the hill and I
guessing, drink alcohol

If you’re uncomfortable with it just say she can’t go.

Can you offer to pick them up; how far is it?
Then you would have peace of mind about them getting home

I have and it’s WW3. I just wanted to gauge if I am out of line here

It was decided? By who exactly?

If it’s Pitbull at Bellahouston, the forecast is rotten!

I can but I don’t really see why I should battle that traffic at midnight when
they have no ticket or indeed interest in the band

No you’re not out of line. WW3 will come and go.

By the friend, her. ‘cool’ parents and my DD.

you’re not being ridiculous or over strict. I can absolutely sense they will get super drunk and struggle getting home.

I used to go to gigs and festivals at 14/15, but was too terrified of my Mum to drink alcoholZ.

You’re not being unreasonable.

I was pretty chilled about my teens going to gigs at that age and travelling only 30 mins there and back wouldn’t have bothered me, but I wouldn’t have let them just hang around in a park drinking, no. That’s completely different.

I agree. If she had tickets and it was a band she really liked , I’d drive out and collect but this is different

That's what I thought but OP says there's limited public transport so maybe not?

Also, it's not really a long walk out of Bellahouston in any direction. Local opinion is that it's quite hard to just sit on the hill because security move people on but I don't know if that's accurate. You would hear pretty well outside the park though.

I have a 15 year old and would say no to this.

A total waste of time, money and effort! She won’t be able to see anything or hear much. And picking her up will be a pain. Just say no and let her huff and puff. I’m all for helping kids have some fun but this is a silly idea. World war 3 will pass!

It would be no from me. Especially if they are drinking.