AIBU to downsize for lower mortgage despite loving our current home?

[Violetandpurple]

Hi all
we currently own a beautiful home, it’s a 4 bed detached that we have converted the loft so we have 6 bedrooms and 4 toilets. (Edit- we have only lived here for almost 3 years, loft done early this year)
we have 4 biological children and we foster.
our mortgage is 206k total.
there is a house for sale down the road, similar area although where we are now is considered ‘nicer’. it has 5 bedrooms and 3 toilets but is a townhouse. 3 bedrooms are 17ft long so we could easily split one to create an extra room.
our mortgage would go down to 60k meaning much more spendable income each month.
current house value 435k approx other house 275k approx.
I would rather live in a less desirable house and not have financial stress. Partner says it’s silly to leave our dream home.

wwyd?

I moved after my divorce to a more urban area in my corner of SE London - the house is large but never got on the area particularly so I’m now downsizing to move back to old quieter spot so I would be wary of moving if you don’t need too.

No way would I move. Being detached is worth a lot, especially when you have children. I’d worry about ending up with terrible neighbours.

I’m all for limiting costs but detached back to an attached house? Do not do this. I’m in a semi but I am attached to the quietest neighbour ever. We do plan to move anyway for a better layout because DH now retired needs a workshop and not to use my conservatory as one which is irritating me, though the thought of leaving my 26 year established garden makes me want to cry. I’m aware she is a perfect neighbour and even if a not especially noisy family move in there will be noise.

Plus unless your 4 kids sit and do nothing noise from yourselves plus a foster kid even if within normal child noise range will be quite a bit. At the minute they have the freedom to do regular kid stuff without you worrying about being the noisy neighbour.

Are you sure £15k is realistic for moving? It sounds a little on the low side to me, but I may be out of date.

I think you would not like the new home and your partner would not be happy there and you would find the townhouse arrangement very inconvenient. Within a short while you would be regretting the move, missing your own home and realising that you’ve not saved very much.

What does your partner say about addressing the financial strains you’re facing?

Moving from a detached house to one not detached with family can be an issue with neighbours who aren't at the same stage in life. Have you considered this in you thoughts. From experience, you don't really appreciate the benefits of detached living until you don't have it. Family life is obviously an important part of your life style with your own children and foster children and your current house works well. Can you say you are sure this would be the case in your new house.
Just something to consider.

Moving and solicitor fees will cost way more than you think and it could get out of control and you would end up saving nothing.

Stay where you are and shop around for a better mortgage.

I did this a few years ago and was surprised that the bank allowed me break out of a fixed rate for free, to go in to a lower rate. Just because I asked! It’s worth a shot.

Don’t move it’s not worth it.

I would absolutely move! £300 a month on your mortgage…that would change everything for me personally.

It's going to take around 3 years on saved payments to pay for the move and getting the new house how you need it.
Is there no chance that the finances will improve in this time?

One thing to consider is the DC. You have 4 plus 1 if you’re fostering. They’re likely quite noisy which doesn’t matter when you’re detached. But would you feel like you’d have to keep them quieter if you were in a terrace?

I am confused. So if you down size you would save £600 to pay for other things.

But you also say it means you wouldn't have to work/work full time. So your income would drop...so sure this money would also be "downsized".

If I am understanding this correctly, you want to downsize to stop working?

No wonder your DH is not on board.

Is there a chance you just need to look for a different job, rather than a different house?

You’ll regret leaving a detached house.

I totally understand your thinking but fear it may not work out how you hope. Have you factored in:

• comparative total size of the 2 houses , new builds are often smaller
• lack of cupboards in the new house which are expensive to build and reduce room size
• noise insulation often poor in new builds , dc might disturb each other or neighbours
• dc needing more space as they grow not less
• dividing large bedrooms means 11 x 8 which is quite small especially without built in storage
• your 15k moving budget sounds low, have you included stamp duty and cost of dividing bedrooms

And it's expensive getting your house perfect as your current one is.,.

This is a really good point

I think you could at least view the house, and have an agent advise on yours so you have the full facts, including all fees, etc.

I can see why the move isn’t appealing to DH as he is the one who’s work doesn’t change but he gets a (in his view) inferior house and you get reduced hours.

Are you more broadly on the same page for other financial savings / spending considerations? Do you have clear budget/plan?

Yes if I work full time they will improve.
if we sold at 420k we would have over 200k in equity so fees etc have been taken into consideration.

It's somewhat of a values based decision. Interesting the value people ascribe to being detached, re noise levels etc. The counter to that is that semi detached properties are likely inherently more energy efficient as they have less external walls, so easier and cheaper to keep warm. Just another perspective.

Honestly OP it doesnt sound like a good move - and how old are you? A townhouse doesn’t seem like the best move for old age? I would also not underestimate being able to continue working full time, paying into your pension - your marriage may well be rock solid but I would never leave myself vulnerable in a divorce by giving up work or a career (would LOVE to not work tho, I get that!). Life and future you needs to be included in this convo as well.

The other house is worth way less though. I think moving would be a huge mistake, you won’t suddenly have all this extra money. (Not with children anyway) every penny will go on doing up the new house that’s not as nice and worth way less.

I know it would be nice to have a smaller mortgage but this isn’t a smart move.

No I don’t work. We are a 1 income family but I foster (which pays pennies only when a child is in place)
so to stay here I would have to find a full time job if we move I can continue to stay home with my children. (Which my dh supports)

I wouldn’t say £450+ a week is ‘pennies’. Theoretically you could receive £23K a year in allowance!

I live on an end town house OP. It doesn’t matter that it’s only attached on one side when next door’s child is running up and down the stairs. You have four children, could you be the noisy neighbour?

I’m not says by you shouldn’t do it, but I’d think carefully about giving up detached.

I wouldn’t move into a townhouse if it’s on 3 floors. I’d do more to make the current mortgage smaller - go for higher salaries or full time work.

I think your moving costs will be far higher than £15k, when all in. So it would take several years at the lower mortgage to make up the spend. Which renders the move a bit pointless.

But additionally, I think that unless unaffordable, it’s a bit mad to move from your “dream home” that is done the way you like and works for you, because it now costs a fortune to do work and the new place may need some.

Your kids will grow and need more space/privacy, a detached home means less noise from neighbours and the ability to make more noise (what if one or more of your children take up instruments?), and you might hate living in the new area. There are so many unknowns.

It sounds like you don’t need the extra money or additional security, and that if you do need a little more, you could work, even part time. I understand that would make fostering harder, but it wouldn’t make it impossible (some foster families have two working parents from what I understand).

Depends. It's nice to have your dream house, but you can become attached to other houses if you make them how you want them.
I have lived in a semi, end terrace and now in detached. Noise has been minimal and hasn't really been a factor in any of them.
I believe in quality of life over spending all your money on a house, so I would probably think about moving if there are still a lot of years left on your mortgage.