Leaving kids for 5 minute late night walk?

[OneOliveOtter]

Husband and wife went out for a quick walk an hour ago whilst kids were sleeping (3 and 5). Gone for just over five minutes. Unreasonable or not?

I wouldn't have done it.

As some have pointed out, if you are a single parent then some situations arise that are unavoidable and the chances of anything actually happening in those few minutes is remote. But things do go wrong unexpectedly even when parents are present, so remote doesn't mean never

I think you sound like youre poking your nose into your neighbours lives.

Taking a dog for a 5 min walk while your small children are asleep at night is far from ideal, but if theyre good parents in every other way, then its none of your business. That's 2 minutes one way, 2 mins back (assuming a minute exaggeration to prove your point). Theyd hardly be out of earshot would they?

Also, how do you know they don't have a grandparent round? Or how long they were gone for? Are you sat watching their house?

It seems unwise to base your decisions on extremely rare, negative outcomes.

I wouldn't avoid all doctors because I've heard of Harold Shipman.

I would say that's neglectful. You can't just leave young dc unsupervised.

Then there is a fire and you knew the children were being left alone, or one falls out of the window as OP has explained??

But you need a doctor when you're unwell. You don't need to both go for a walk at the same time when there are children asleep alone. One risk is worth taking and the other is not.

However I don't think you actually know they were left alone @OneOliveOtter ?

How do you know they don’t have a relative in the house with the kids?!

This was the first thought that came to my mind. Madeline McCann! 😞
Definitely unreasonable!

If it’s true then it’s awful

But I’m not sure how you know for sure they didn’t have someone else there?

If I had a monitoring app on my phone and could constantly check the kids were asleep (and speak to them) then possibly. But not if two parents were available.

Gone for just over five minutes
That could be all it takes to change lives forever. The children are aged 3 & 5 FFS!

How do you know they are alone?

Makes me think of the woman who lost her kids to a house fire after she popped to the shops.

I find it very tedious when I'm out with my husband in the evenings and I get grilled by people asking who's looking after my children - presumably I come across as the kind of mum who would leave them alone (I am pretty laid-back!). I can't help but wonder if you're jumping to conclusions here, OP. There could easily be a grandparent or other relative in the house.

Personally I think walking a few feet down the road to allow a dog to relieve itself is fair enough, if the house is within hearing and seeing distance. I used to pop next door to pick up parcels etc when my kids were small. And I spent evenings in the garden while they slept inside.

I didn't endorse leaving the kids unattended. But the reason you don't leave your kids unattended shouldn't be because of Madelaine McCann. In almost all cases, it is immature to make decisions based on tiny probabilities of bad outcomes.

How do you know they haven’t got family/friends round?

How do you know there is no adult in the house?! Did they tell you that?! Maybe they have a visiting grandparent or aunt etc at home.

When assessing risk, you don't just consider the likelihood, but also the severity of impact or consequence of worst case scenario

Just because something is unlikely to happen doesn't mean you should disregard it. Especially when decent and reasonable alternatives exist

No. Never. If there was a child predator in your area, they’d soon learn your timeline.

This. Unlikely but if something happens it’s catastrophic. My surgeon told me that once. His complication rate might be 1% but for that 1% it’s game over

They might have another adult staying with them.

Even if the animal desperately needed walked there’s no need for both of them to go!

Unless they maybe have guests you’re unaware of? I’m a single mum and my sister or mum stay over with me the odd night. On those nights I might walk my dog once Dd is sleeping….for all my neighbours know, I could be leaving my Dd home alone! (But I never would!)

I won't even leave my 13yr old & 10yr old to go for a quick walk with my husband. We take it in turns. I can just imagine if they wake up and suddenly we both aren't there.

Hi,

I work for an overseas government.

There’s a big meeting scheduled at HQ next month. My boss advocated for me to go - great!

Catch is that it’s a 12.5hr overnight flight (Monday), straight into work (Tuesday), two full days of meetings, fly home after last meeting (Thursday).

My boss is travelling Business, me Economy.

Total journey time ~16hrs.

Struggle to sleep on flights at the best of times, will be broken and not my best self with my new colleagues and management (been here 5 months). Plus I feel a bit devalued.

Proposed to fly indirect at a fraction of of the cost (in Business) but not allowed.
Choice of carrier means I can’t even use my own loyalty points to upgrade.

Should I suck it up, get back in my box and feel ‘grateful’?

Thoughts welcome. Thank you.

Not ok. They didn’t both need to go. Plus what’s the point of a 5 min walk?!