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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not know how to handle my 13yo autistic son?

3 replies

AnonMumOfAutisticSon1 · 26/06/2026 18:59

He was asked to leave an outing today because of his awful behaviour.

On Monday, for the first time ever, he looked in my face and laughed when I told him to do something. And I realised I had no way to make him do what I said. I'm scared to say too much as I think the nice families we know who tolerate his behaviour might stop, if they really knew how bad he can be.

He asked on Wednesday about teenage rebellion so I think he knows he's behaving really badly but nothing changes.

Does anyone please have any advice / suggestions / resources? Thank you

OP posts:
Phineyj · 26/06/2026 19:02

Obviously I don't know your son, but my daughter, also autistic, sometimes laughs in situations where other people wouldn't. It can mean "I'm awkward/uncomfortable/feeling some other emotion."

Don't panic.

I like the book 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child for tips (Jeffrey Bernstein).

Roomonthe3rdfloor · 26/06/2026 19:08

How bad is bad? Have you tried the usual grounding, no hobbies, taking away electronics etc, especially as he was asked to leave today he needs some consequence.

I think its a good thing he asked you about teenage rebellion its a good chance to chat about hormones and body changes etc.

Teenage boys can be tough my brother was an absolute nightmare, then one day at about 16 he started being nice again!

Toastytina · 26/06/2026 19:12

Is he hormonal, this can really effect autistic boys. They do some through it though.

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