Are we less tolerant to noise? Neighbourhoods have always been noisy

[Fishareidiots]

Just that really.
In generations gone by I expect everyone used their gardens much more as there was less on telly, plus they weren’t all at cinema, b&q, softplay, swimming. So what has changed?
why is it now that there are so many complaints about kids playing, chatting, sunbathing in bikinis, drinking alcohol etc.

Behaviour is worse. Partly because people have more opportunity (phone audio with no headphones) and partly because people seem more selfish (try visiting a cinema to see how much worse things are)

Because people are less nice to each other, so people want to avoid each other. Dyou remember when the neighbours would bring over a tray of tea for you if you’d just moved in? When people shushed their kids in order to respect adults?
all of that has gone, and treating people carelessly leads to lack of good will.

I think that many new build houses are built with very small gardens/yards so that noise is more intrusive. When I was young we didn't have trampolines or hot tubs and I don't remember hearing any noisy lawn mowers, hedge trimmers or jet washers.

Behaviour is far worse, gardens are far smaller.
In my lounge, I can hear my neighbour doing karaoke in his shed.
His power tools are running within 6 feet of me, and I have no choice or warning about when he does it.
If I were to organise a family party, he would be quite likely to be power tooling, or have music, guests and a BBQ. And they are loud. Loud music. Loud talking.

Kids used to be told off and they behaved. Yes they played out and were noisy at times, but it was background noise, ie. nice sound. And when they escalated it, started to fight, they were disciplined and told to get back in.

Nowadays kids are not noisy. They are extremely and unpleasantly loud. Sudden bust of explosive sounds. Too of their voices. And when someone dare say something, the parents shout to defend their little angels who should never ever be disciplined or told no.

Gardens used to be bigger than houses.

When I was little (in the 70s) we'd have got flack from one set of neighbours for being loud outside. Based on that highly representative sample, I'm not sure things have changed that much - just different types of noise now maybe!

I think more people are WFH so they aren’t simply at home, using the space for enjoyment, so normal noise from those who are becomes problematic. We also have more time spent at home so these annoyances really grate.

When I was growing up in the 1980s the only people at home during the day were SAHMs, retired people and children.

If everyone at home was at home, not at work at home, I think there would be more tolerance.

We were allowed to play and did the occasional shriek of loud excitement or laughter etc - but were quickly told to pipe down and to think of the neighbours if we were getting ott . Too loud we were brought in to calm down .

nowadays so many people think kids need to be kids - and that means that kids can scream incessantly and throw balls over and generally be feral and an absolute nuisance to others.

what has been lost is not tolerance but a little respect and consideration for other people.

no one minds kids playing but constant screaming or constant loud music or shouting is unnecessary and just shows no respect for others.

I think it's two fold

On new build estates gardens are smaller and the layout of houses means that you might actually border more than two neighbours.

Outdoor music with loudspeakers, hot tubs, outdoor cinemas, a lot of powertools are all things that didn't really exist in the past.

Both kids and parents were better behaved - it wasn't a thing for adults to squeal and children would be better told off for it.

These massive sound systems weren’t as common and people who had them kept them in their living rooms not with patio doors open blasting their shitty dance tunes across the street’s gardens.

There wasn't a mumsnet to complain about it then? Kids have always been naughty, and there's been cramped yards since forever - look at victorian yards.

I disagree- there has been more of a move towards outdoor living and at home entertaining especially since Covid so I think we in our gardens more.

But I do think people are more selfish

In yesteryear everyone’s noise was about the same level

plus people went into work they didn’t expect their homes to be office level noise

I think you are right OP. People seem to be enraged by the basic sounds of living. Children yelling, car doors slamming, dogs barking.

I live in a rural village. We have farmers hay making through the night at the moment. A massey ferguson tractor bombing up and down, with spot lights on at 2am and a bale wrapper, cockrels crowing at 4am, owls screeching and deer barking. Plus a local teenager with a dodgy exhaust.
Most of the village is on the move by 7am.

Maybe the fresh air makes us sleep easier, but I sleep soundly through all of the above. I assume everyone else does too. No sign of anyone with huge black bags under their eyes. No one ripping anyone's arms off.

People didn't used to have sound systems in their gardens blasting very loud music or stay out in the garden shouting

Kids played together then up down alleys and in the road

but roads are off limits now basically

so everyone is trapped in their gardens so no wonder the kids scream
but hey a driver’s right means kids are trapped everyone who whinges has contributed to where we are

Yep. Everyone has become entitled and selfish and couldn’t give a fuck about anyone else as long as they’re doing what they want. Look at any car park, supermarket etc. I’m astonished by what I see on the roads most days. Not waiting in line at temp traffic lights. Fuck that, why should I. Pulling out of junctions in front of you when there’s no cars behind. Can’t wait. Kids screaming and ruling the roost. Truly awful.

Oh and our neighbours in the 90s habitually blasted their tunes for four hours on a Saturday when they blitzed the house and played much quieter the rest of the time. They would never dream of playing music at 11pm. Their five kids were semi-feral but would never go around screaming for the sake of it because their dad would have belted them. There was always at least one dog barking somewhere though and we just tuned them out. Not as many people had massive breeds or tiny ones though so the barking was in that mid range that was less annoying.

Because it's not so very long ago that barbeques weren't a thing, or at least didn't come out at the first sign of sun. People who wanted to drink went to the pub. The technology to play loud music was there but nowhere near as easily available. And (most) people were less selfish. Screaming kids were told to pack it in. But now there's 24 hour TV it's put on first thing in the morning and not switched off until bedtime, meaning all conversations have to be loud enough to be heard over the box in the corner/on the wall. Nobody wants silence, or even quiet any more.

I know I'm not describing every person/family in the UK as being like that. But there's a lot more of them about than there used to be.

"I expect" - IOW you're making it up.

My dad was fucking insane by today’s standards

but the neighbours put up with our cockerel because he gave them fresh eggs (and tomatoes) and would be the first there to tow them home (cars broke down much more)

so the cockerel was tolerated

More feral kids and parents. More entitlement. More loud tablets.

Life has changed. 🤷‍♀️

No. The big change is a massive rise in lack of respect for other people and selfishness and self interest at the expense of other people.

30 years ago people would mostly be considerate of others in close proximity. Now My Needs is king.

Plus this cheaper access to noise making equipment like loud speakers, outdoor TV screens, hot tubs trampolines it's a recipe for a lot of noise because people don't care.

Plus there is a really big cultural shift as well towards person-centred behaviour being always acceptable. So many people now think their children SHOULD be allowed to scream, shout, kick a ball at your fence repeatedly, watch loud cartoons on a phone/tablet with the speaker on on public transport without headphones, whether it disturbs you or not because 'they are children'.

There is no disciplining of children at all in many cases. The same is true of children with SN and behavioral issues. There is a sense that teaching them from a young age that it is not acceptable and forcing them to try to self regulate is a terrible thing and that letting them have massive tantrum meltdowns anywhere and everywhere is better for them - there is a very 'laissez-faire' attitude to all of this which means children grow up thinking it's perfectly fine for them to do what they like and make as much noise as they like with no consequences. Which leads to adults - who when a reasonable polite request is made to turn down music or temper disturbing noise - are often aggressive, entitled and verbally abusive because that is how they have been raised.

No respect for others anywhere these days. .