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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to get changed on poolside after toddler swimming lessons?

43 replies

TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 10:04

Just started swimming lessons with my 18 month old. The swimming pool it is at has a tiny mixed sex changing room that you walk through to get to the pool so no privacy at all. There are 2 cubicles but they are always taken.

Would I be unreasonable to get changed in a corner on poolside? The guidance from the swim school says this is allowed and there is loads more room than the tiny changing room which is so cramped if there are 6 of us plus 6 toddlers trying to get changed, but I did it the first time and feel like I was being weird because all the other mums tramped off into the changing room and took forever because it was mayhem.

There are sometimes dads who come swimming or are watching but they’d have to walk past us in the changing room anyway and I guess it’s no different to getting dressed at the beach? I keep under a towel and am very discrete.

Am I over thinking this or am I being a complete weirdo not using the changing room??

OP posts:
ColdAsAWitches · 25/06/2026 10:06

There's only two changing cubicles for a whole pool? That seems unlikely.

Larrythecatforpm · 25/06/2026 10:08

Yes you’re being unreasonable. Changing rooms are there for a reason.

WhatAMarvelousTune · 25/06/2026 10:10

If I was going straight home I’d bring a skirt and loose top, dry myself, put clothes on over my swimming costume and sort myself out at home tbh. Getting changed after swimming with a toddler is always a pain in the arse

TakingThePeanutsCarol · 25/06/2026 10:13

I think it’s logical!
The pool I used to use for baby swim were like that, so cramped, no cubicles and a nightmare with all the babies and parents trying to change.

You say the guidance says it’s allowed - does it specifically say you can get changed poolside?

If you’re being discreet, and also not blocking anybody’s way, I can’t see why it’s a problem.

TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 11:18

It’s a private pool hence the weird set up. The instructions we were sent when joining said many people prefer to get changed poolside as there’s more room. It’s obviously not NOT allowed, it just feels weird!

the changing room is tiny, about 3m x 3m with benches, many people sit down while changing or wait for somebody else to leave.

OP posts:
TheRealMagic · 25/06/2026 11:21

TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 11:18

It’s a private pool hence the weird set up. The instructions we were sent when joining said many people prefer to get changed poolside as there’s more room. It’s obviously not NOT allowed, it just feels weird!

the changing room is tiny, about 3m x 3m with benches, many people sit down while changing or wait for somebody else to leave.

I think if you've been specifically told you can do this it's for a reason, and you should go ahead! If it makes you feel better/less weird about it you can think of it as that you are actually being very selfless to leave the changing rooms for those who do, for whatever reason, prefer to use them.

TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 11:32

This was my thinking. The people using the changing room actually block the entrance/exit as it’s the way in and out of the pool. You have to be so careful opening the door in case there’s a child behind it!

OP posts:
dizzydizzydizzy · 25/06/2026 11:35

Ex lifeguard here. Please don’t do it. No nudity allowed on poolside. And if you are referring to the spectator seating area, you will be making it wet and somebody could fall over. I would expect the lifeguard to tell you to change in the changing room.

toastofthetown · 25/06/2026 11:35

You’re not unreasonable given it’s permitted. I’d switch pools because that setup sounds terrible to me and I wouldn’t want to change publicly or share two cubicles between six families.

Bitzee · 25/06/2026 11:39

I would assume the instructions about changing poolside are standard wording sent to everyone and are meant to only apply to the children- preschoolers may not have an adult in the pool with them and I don’t think anyone would mind them doing a quick poolside change. As an adult it’s very inappropriate. If you don’t want to wait for the changing room just chuck something over quickly then sort yourself out properly at home.

TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 12:05

dizzydizzydizzy · 25/06/2026 11:35

Ex lifeguard here. Please don’t do it. No nudity allowed on poolside. And if you are referring to the spectator seating area, you will be making it wet and somebody could fall over. I would expect the lifeguard to tell you to change in the changing room.

There is no lifeguard, it’s a private pool. The floor area is that ‘wet carpet’ stuff so not slippy

OP posts:
TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 12:08

I agree it’s a bit weird, hence why I posted. But I don’t see any difference between changing poolside or in the changing rooms where everyone has to squeeze past you to get to the pool anyway, at least poolside I can go in a corner behind some chairs. If anything I get more privacy poolside!

OP posts:
Didimum · 25/06/2026 12:20

If it's in the pool's policy that you're allowed to do this, when why would you ask here?

dizzydizzydizzy · 25/06/2026 12:24

TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 12:05

There is no lifeguard, it’s a private pool. The floor area is that ‘wet carpet’ stuff so not slippy

No lifeguard! I would consider going elsewhere for swimming lessons. All my rescues were in swimming lessons, including a baby whose mother was in the pool (she slipped and fell over).

TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 12:28

Didimum · 25/06/2026 12:20

If it's in the pool's policy that you're allowed to do this, when why would you ask here?

Because no-one else does it. My AIBU wasn’t am I allowed to do it, it was is it weird to do it?

OP posts:
TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 12:30

dizzydizzydizzy · 25/06/2026 12:24

No lifeguard! I would consider going elsewhere for swimming lessons. All my rescues were in swimming lessons, including a baby whose mother was in the pool (she slipped and fell over).

Why would we need a lifeguard at a private pool where there are 8 adults and 7 kids?

OP posts:
Pippapotamus · 25/06/2026 12:31

Is it a puddleducks or waterbabies type of swimming lessons so all the learners are babies or toddlers? They usually use very small private pools hence no lifeguard. If they allow it id have no hesitation changing a toddler poolside.

roshi42 · 25/06/2026 12:32

Ah, people are envisioning a leisure centre not the private pool baby lessons - I remember them from my maternity leave! This would be totally fine - especially as they say it’s okay - I would just be quick and discrete, as you say! Hated any changing fuss after baby swimming lessons, I always made it as quick as possible - loose clothes and shorts and flip flops even in winter

poetryandwine · 25/06/2026 12:38

Hi, OP -

I would do this in my home country, as would others, but I would not be the first to do it in the UK. I realise you would be under a towel and the mention of nudity above is thus inaccurate, but it demonstrates the problem. People may be quick to draw the wrong conclusions.

If you and another mum or two can join forces and break the ice on this together, that’s a different story. Numbers may normalise the idea.

Swissmeringue · 25/06/2026 12:39

I'd avoid it entirely, when my DD had lessons at a private pool when she was little I got one of those towelling robes, chucked it on, got her dry and changed then got dressed at home. The tiny changing rooms was one of the reasons we switched to leisure centre swimming lesson.

But no, if you need to get changed, you're doing it discreetly (i.e. pulling a maxi dress over your towel before pulling your swimsuit down) and you've explicitly been told it's fine to change poolside then yanbu.

minipie · 25/06/2026 12:44

I don’t see the issue if you are covering up while you change. Sounds like everyone will see you change whether it’s in the changing room or not.

Places like Decathlon do adult size towel ponchos, they’re huge and easy to change under, which might make life easier.

Bellaboo01 · 25/06/2026 12:47

TheTigerWhoCameForWine · 25/06/2026 12:28

Because no-one else does it. My AIBU wasn’t am I allowed to do it, it was is it weird to do it?

Yes of course it is weird. Getting naked (however discreet you are as i'm assuming you are drying yourself off) in front of everyone who is having a splash around isnt probably what they are expecting of a grown woman. A child is different.
I cant believe that you are actually considering this ok.
Wait for one of the cubicles or go home wet and sort yourself out there!

Faceonthewrongfoot · 25/06/2026 12:52

I think a lot of the comments on here are from people who haven't been to these little private pools and are thinking of their own gym/leisure centre pools.

The one we used to go, there were no changing rooms at all - just an area poolside that had those portable screen things around it and a couple of changing tables to put the babies on. We all just got on with it and got changed as quickly as we could.

I think if the instructions you've recieved say you can, I would just crack on. Other people maybe don't like the idea of it, but as you say, it makes no difference, since the same people coming past you changing in the changing room are the same people who might see you poolside. The only difference is the space!

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 25/06/2026 12:57

I thought you were just talking about your child, in which case YANBU but for you to get changed poolside YABU. I always used to just put a tracksuit on over my swimsuit and get properly changed at home. No one wants to see a grown woman crouching behind chairs getting changed. Just throw something on over your swimsuit, change your child and leave. I’m sure the poolside changing rule was only ever meant for children, not adults.

Tinkalinkalink · 25/06/2026 12:58

Getting changed poolside? Yourself? Have you lost your mind?

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