I am in my 20s. My relationship with my paternal grandmother has been strained for around 5 years.
I am the eldest grandchild for context and there are quite a few other grandchildren after me. Over the last few years she purposely makes sly remarks, brings up my deceased maternal grandfather (in a not very nice way), makes comments that are rude and accusatory about me not visiting her - despite me visiting her a lot more frequently than her other grandchildren. She’s also made comments to my father and uncle and told them both to divorce their wives (despite there being no marital issues) alongside many other comments that are just as bad but far too long to list here.
A common theme in my grandmothers life is she seems to DESPISE women that aren’t directly hers. So for instance, I am obviously half my mother’s child, for some bizarre reason she has an issue with this. In the last 5 years I think I am reminding her more of my mother (I look like her, I am a similar age to when she married my father etc). So whenever I do see her she is constantly looking for a fight, or a conversation that she can twist.
Over the last few visits (the last one was beginning of the year) I have come home in tears over the comments she has made. I’ve been so upset that my own grandmother has made me feel this way and I don’t have anything to nice to say about her as a person.
My father has guilted me into visiting her over the years (she had a number of serious illnesses however miraculously she always manages to make a recovery). However this has considerably reduced in recent years.
AIBU to consider never seeing her again? Despite her being old and probably in her last years I think I would be quite at peace knowing I never have to see her again.