Parenting

[zubsichii]

Me and my partner are 19 & 20, we’re expecting a baby Oct 13th.. 24 weeks along on Tuesday.

we haven’t found a place to live & we’re on the council list but on band d.. is there anything we can do to help bump us up??
we’re really starting to worry now, incase we don’t find a place to live as we currently live with my partners parents and we both agree it isn’t suitable to raise our baby.

is there anything at all we can do to get a 2 bed house in the Derbyshire area? We’ve tried to Private rent numerous times but they won’t allow us to, as my partner wont bring enough home while I’m on taking maternity pay. Any advice or guidance?

I think you’ll move up bands when the baby is born

Hoping so! Doesn’t help he has ADHD & autism, so he’s wanting things to be done now and in time for the baby coming. It’s a struggle but, I hope we do move up!

Yes I was going to say this - you will become a priority if an infant child in involved - but obviously this does cause hassle and concern for you meantime.

Im not an expert, but perhaps meeting your MP and enlisting his or her help in dealing with the Council / housing authority might help. At the very least, they should be able to give some good advice. They could contact the Council on your behalf, even attend meetings with them, and be your advocate.

Dont be shy about it, its their job!

And dont just accept anything you are offered - big up the childs needs, in terms of requiring good quality housing, decent neighbours and a peaceful & safe neighbourhood.

Good luck - and dont worry - everything will work out in the end!

You will move up - but take the initiative (see my post above) and see if you can get things resolved in your favour earlier.

Maybe mentioning your parnter's autism/adhd could strengthen your case too.

Good luck!

Thank you, I will definitely get in touch with our local MP & see what they can do. Hopefully they can help. I think once my partners mind is at ease, everything will slowly feel like it’s falling into place.

and thank you for mentioning to not accept anything we’re offered. We definitely want good quality housing but a peaceful and safe neighbourhood is one we’re heavy on! With him having autism, it comes with severe anxiety / paranoia as well, which means he won’t leave the house unless it mandatory / absolutely necessary. So a peaceful & safe neighbourhood with decent neighbours might give him the opportunity to try and get out more, especially for walks with the baby ect when it’s here.

praying it does work out in the end!! 🤞🤞

@zubsichii Absolute credit to you both that you are both working, despite the challenges.
We're 45 and 50 and still in rented (private) as can't afford to buy despite both I working too so I totally appreciate it's not at all easy!

MPs won’t do anything if the councils are working in accordance with their published polices. They can’t bump you up the list and can’t magic up a council house. Also your banding may not increase once the baby is here. You’ll need to check your councils housing allocation policy

We definitely want good quality housing but a peaceful and safe neighbourhood is one we’re heavy on!

I have no doubt that’s what everyone wants.

With him having autism, it comes with severe anxiety / paranoia as well, which means he won’t leave the house unless it mandatory / absolutely necessary.

I hope your midwife is aware of these issues and you’ll get the support you’ll need when your baby arrives.

Congratulations on the pregnancy 😀
In my authority, your banding won't change when the baby is here. Your partners parents would need to say that you can no longer stay there and you would then be placed in temporary housing and given a higher banding.
What is it about the partners parents that makes it unsuitable? If there are serious concerns, that could increase the banding, especially if you have the midwife or children's social care saying it isn't suitable.

the bedroom we are currently in is tiny, I’d say it’s slightly bigger than a ‘casual’ disabled toilets at shopping centres / restaurants. There isn’t any room to put anything. his parents have a staffy (renown to be hyperactive). The house is a council house, 3 bedroom’s with 5 people living in it, but nobody can swap rooms as everyone needs the room they’re in (his brother works from his room, his parents are disabled and terminally ill so machines and that stuff are in that bedroom). the house is cramped as it is; but we can’t move anything out his room to put a cot in here; as we’d not be able to put our clothes / appliances anywhere. both of his parents can’t work as they’re disabled ; his brother works from home & also a day job.

we’re trying to get the health visitor to come round for inspection, will that help our case do you know?

I think because he has astronomical health anxieties & struggles to comprehend that nothing bad will happen to him if he leaves the house (that’s one of his biggest fears) then i think it’ll push him to go out more & do more things with the baby, if you get me??

the midwife is aware; we had his mental health team & a couple other people to write letters to the council, but iirc they disregarded it as it doesn’t really mean anything to them (essentially it doesn’t change anything). And that letter included all mental health difficulties & all his diagnoses.

Thank you so very much!
it’s a struggle at the minute, but we’re trying !
I thought renting was expensive, until I realised buying houses are so expensive, it’s a real struggle!! I appreciate you sharing that with me, thank you ☺️

ill have a look at housing policies for sure!

I don’t suppose if you happen to know if I’m able to apply to more than 1 council by any chance?

You don't need a two bed house at this point. Have you looked at renting a 1 bed flat? You are likely to meet the affordability.

I think you need to bring your expectations down. You could be waiting years for a council house, and it might a far cry from the nice 2 bedroom house in a nice area you are imagining.

A homeless application yes. An application to the general housing register you can try but you’d probably need to meet local connection criteria with the other council

@Passaggressfedup totally agree. I only got our council house because our private landlord evicted us after seven years. Had two school age children.
I think the op will have to be ready to accept anything from the council.
You can always swap at a later date

@zubsichii have you spoken to the housing department at your local council??
Regards the housing list position....you have a roof over your head, even though its overcrowded.
That's how the housing department will see it.
It might bump you up as you are already overcrowded.
However i think you looking for a two bed house in a nice area is slightly unrealistic.
Would a one bed flat be any good?
Bid on anything and everything on the council site.
Good luck!
Please don't hesitate to message me if you have any questions.

I think you may need to lower your expectations quite drastically! In most areas nice 2 bed council houses in a nice area are like unicorn poo! (Non existent)

Also OP... please don't be out off by a one-bed for the moment as your baby will be in with you for a while anyway. When we had our baby we didn't have a spare room (private rental) so she was in with us for the first 5-ish years.
She's six now and despite having her own room (her eldest brother is at uni), she still gets in with us every night!! 😄
All will be OK.