I’m sorry to post on here, partly to get a bit more traffic.
I was told about Little Disasters on Channel 5. (If you have Paramount+ you can watch the whole thing without adverts.)
It took me far longer than it should have to realise what she was struggling with, they do mention postnatal OCD. PN OCD can come in many forms, but the one she has is Harm OCD.
I suffered with this for over 2 years after my first daughter was born. I felt so alone and so scared. The thought of anyone else going through it alone is heartbreaking because you feel like you can’t tell anyone, not even a doctor or therapist, as you’re terrified your child will be taken away.
If this sounds similar, please please get a book called Dropping the Baby and Other Scary Thoughts. I was in floods of tears reading it because it felt like they were describing exactly what I was feeling. The reassurance that it was normal was life changing.
And please, if you’re struggling with this, message me. I’m more than happy to share my experience and help if I can.x