To feel overwhelmed by teen phones.

[constantnc]

My daughter has developed a phone obsession which I am struggling with.
I am not tech savvy and although I have limited YouTube to 1 hour a day I cannot delete it on her android phone.
No other social media installed.
Uses watsapp, trxt, calls, and must access the school app daily.
I want to delete YouTube but cant on her phone, thinking it might be easier to buy a phone without it on?? But which one??
Thanks for help

Give her a brick phone

A brick phone won't allow her on the school app.

Can you limit her time on the phone? Physically remove it from her?

Its a 2 hour limit then the phone goes away till the next day.
She must access the school app.
Suggestions of an android phone without YouTube welcomed please.

Can she access school app from a laptop. Take phone off her. Tell school you aren't giving access to a phone and she will need to look at the app at school and write things down in her homework diary.

My 1wyo was on his phone late Monday and Tuesday night. I only let him have it Tues because he was coming home alone. Since then I have taken it off him. He can have it back when he shows me he will go to sleep at a reasonable hour without sneaking on devices.

You really do need to install and use parental controls. Don't hide by not being tech savvy. It's essential.

I canlock my dc phones from an ipad. You need to do this if she won't get off it.

Are you saying that the photo she has now has YouTube on and it actually can’t be deleted? Or that she is reinstalling it?

What phone does she have?

https://www.smartphonefreechildhood.org/alternatives

Further down the page theres a section about ‘follow on phones’ for 14-16yr olds that may be what you are looking for.

Do you have access on her phone to put in google family link? I believe that is the best one with an android

FOr a while I paid for an app / system called Qustudio it specifically allowed you to block or control youtube

Unfortunately it didn't work properly on my sons iphone and didn't block tik tok

honestly these systems are a nightmare.

The phone has YouTube installed and cant be deleted. It has a 1 hour time limit on it which I will reduce till its 0.
Oppo phone on EE contract.
She had it age 11 for high school

I tried to install family link but got so confused about a google account.
I think will try again with AI help.
Equally happy to buy a phone without YouTube installed.

She would just watch YouTube via the internet explorer anyway, it’s just a website. Is she ignoring your 1 hour limit? I’m not sure what you mean by she’s obsessed if there’s a limit on it.

If it is an android phone you will be able to enable a "kids mode" which is only the apps that you explicitly allow, can be time limited and is password protected so that she cant exit kids mode without you putting in the password or using finger prints, maybe try that and don't include YouTube on the allowed list?
Edit: if you did this, you would also need to unlock the phone every time she wants to use it, so maybe not ideal if she is using it for messaging aswell

Why does she have to access the app? Schools won’t change until parents push back. Tell them she has a brick phone and won’t be accessing it. If there’s a desktop version she can check in on a laptop or computer.

Parents and schools have to work together on this and schools need to stop using tech for every aspect of schooling.

Parents and schools have to work together on this and schools need to stop using tech for every aspect of schooling. Agree with this to some extent -schools need to offer phone and not-phone access to resources so that parents can manage tech usage in a child-specific way.

How long does she need access to school app? Surely not all day every day

While I agree with you, for now she must access the school app. So needs a phone to do that.

She doesn't go beyond her time no, but seems to constantly want it, and watching the YouTube scrolling crap seems to have influenced how she speaks to me and her siblings....very short with us, borders on rude. Its not pleasant.

Yes the kids use the app in class to access work and at home to submit homework. At lunchtime for the dinner app etc. Its a pain.

@constantnc just use family link and block YouTube.

I use family link. My teen (15) gets 90 minutes a day, no social media, and YouTube is limited to 15 mins. When his time runs out he can only then access his school homework app, WhatsApp, duolingo and other educational apps.

It locks at 9pm and he hands the phonen over.

Its so easy to set up. If he doesn't agree with my rules he doesn't get a phone at all.

I will try family link agsin.

Do you have to set up a google account for the childs phone to use it? That's where I got stuck...

But why must she?

Family link is good. You must have a google account and you add the child's account. The parent app works on both android and Apple. You can block YouTube completely. Are you already using it? You mention limiting YouTube time,

You can even use Family Link via a web browser: https://familylink.google.com/member/3/controls

If you go to app settings I'm sure you can disable you tube under app info and the icon will disappear.