AIBU to think some Mumsnet posters take things too seriously?

[AurielleBaies]

Took some time off Mumsnet and recently came back to have a look at what’s going on.

I can’t quite get my head around some of the topics and responses (it’s mainly the responses - think along the lines of someone being ‘utterly disgusted’ over a non issue). I know it’s a chat forum open to for all topics but oh my god some people need to take a chill pill and realise nothing is that serious. People get so ridiculously irate and angry over seemingly minor issues. I’m not saying I haven’t either in the past but I have come to realise not much is worth stressing and getting angry and upset over.

AIBU to think some of MN takes it all a bit too seriously?

It’s just because there’s so many different types of people on here, I used to be bemused at how many people would tell people to go nc, ltb or stop being a people pleaser for tiny things, but weirdly I think lately it’s evened out and there’s more common sense where people are saying actually helping someone out isn’t doing you any harm if you can, just don’t burn yourself out. I think you just have to step back from the threads that are full of angry people projecting their own issues and realise they must have had it tough themselves if they think an argument with a friend means it’s end of friendship

Which one? I love stuff like this, it's so entertaining

Spot on, OP. I like reading all the nonsense, especially the ones about marriages that have gone wrong. The answers all seem to boil down to the same solution; leave him, tell him to go, divorce him.
Do people seriously regard their own marriages in such a cavalier way? And do they think it’s that simple?
“He forgot our anniversary.” - “Leave him!”
”He’s been messaging à woman from work about orders for business stationery.” -“He’s obviously having an affair so tell him to leave!”

The hyperbole is off the charts. Sometimes it looks like posters compete to be the most hyperbolic on the thread, from I’m sitting here weeping to its hideous, I just roll my eyes.

i think the more concerning ones are the angry posters who just want to fight and argue with people. As well as the ones who actually think it’s a voluntary job and they are on here giving advice.

I prefer it to the performative un-botheredness. 'I could not bring myself to get worked up about this OP'' 'and this is an issue why?' 'surely you just....'. And, worst of all, the passive-aggressive 'and what did s/he say when you said [thing I think you should have said] OP?'

It's a website, the point is for people to post their niggles, large and small. People being dramatically baffled that anything bothers anyone or that anyone has had the audacity to post somewhere where, after all, no-one is forced to read it, annoys me much more.

There are two aspects to it. The taking minor things too seriously and the use of dramatic words.

The example of the kid running after pigeons illustrates it perfectly. Yes, it would be nice if kids stopped running after pigeons, but in the scheme of things that we should focus on as a society, it is such a minor concern. As for the words that were used to describe it? So over the top, it made a mockery of the actual words.

All down to the media and how it eats into people's brains. Dramatics over nothing. The upcoming ban is sooooo welcome. Hopefully we are seeing the worse of it now.

I think there are a lot of women who post on here who feel their voice doesn't carry much weight in their real life so it's a chance for them to express their thoughts and feel heard when they post on here.

As is often said, happy people don't go around being deliberately and unnecessarily unkind to people.

Instead of top ten "Trending" and "Shopping" side bars
I would love to have a "Most batshit" threads of the day list.

That's a brilliant idea!

Just like real life

Yes, it’s funny how ridiculous some people are.

It’s the anger at others having a different viewpoint that often shocks me: some will get so annoyed and try to belittle another poster who has the temerity to disagree with them; often to the extent of searching their previous posts to find something to beat them up with.
It happened to me once - someone triumphantly quoted posts of mine from another thread to show me up as a hypocrite.
I would happily have told them! 😀

It’s about music on a beach. Views and opinions don’t seem to relate to reality of what actually happens when you go to a beach, it doesn’t take account of normal behaviours and beach type scenarios. Perhaps people don’t usually go to the beach. Anyway, it all got very serious!

I tend to think of Trending as pretty much that 😂

True, I guess in real life we don’t always hear people’s thoughts or they can be corrected if they are wrong .

In real life there's a better chance of a proper discussion but there's still s lot of assumptions made based on personal experience (eg, I am unhappy living alone so you should preserve your marriage at all costs, or vice versa).

I kind of feel that taking part in a thread means you need to take it somewhat seriously.
The thing that annoys me is when someone asks for advice (I want some white trainers/move to Greenwich/buy a canary) and the thread is full of people saying "I really can't be bothered with this" - I mean, there are quite a few other threads you could post on in that case.

There's a nice thread on Black Forest Gateaux, that is being taking nice and seriously, despite the fact that it is not the only thing happening in the world right now. People uninterested in BFGs seem to have stayed away (I hope I have not unwittingly unleashed a torrent here by mentioning it).

You do know that the LAST thing you should say to an enraged woman is ‘you need to calm down’?

So you sound pretty chill. Others aren’t so much. Let people express themselves without judgment!! Surely that’s the height of chill?

Good point! But I'm imagining something curated for the truly hardcore rabbit-hole seekers and students of human batshittery.

Oh I agree but I have been visiting for years.

I actually think a lot of people with angry responses asserting what they would have done / would do in a situation are probably bullshitting.

All the " if that had been me I would have ripped him a new one", " he would be an ex by now", "that would be the last time MIL sees my baby" type of comments. Hmm, would you really?

I think what tends to happen is that people start by posting a fairly softly held opinion, then someone quotes and disagrees, and calls them to account for it, often quite stridently, so they defend it. And before you know it you're prepared to die on the hill that its fine not to offer a pregnant friend cake rather than just a biscuit, or that you need three bikinis not two for a week in Ibiza.

I agree.

Oh my lawddd, here is another one 🤣🤣🤣

Always someone to be offended by nonsense.

Simply because someone has a difference if opinion to you it doesnt mean they are taking offence.

I can have an oposing opinion to you without I have taken offence to your view