Would it be awkward if DS17 asked family friends’ daughter to lunch

[TidyMentor]

DS17 met up with some family friends today and when he got home told us that he wants to invite their DD out for lunch.

I’m probably overthinking it, but I'm wondering if this has the potential to make things awkward between us and her parents.

AIBU to think it could be a bit embarrassing if it doesn’t go smoothly, or is this just a normal part of teenagers growing up?

How old is the daughter? If she is a similar age to your son I can't see much harm in it. If she is not interested, she can say "no". I recall hearing my brother in law did do similar years ago but decided he preferred her sister and flagged the whole thing away (without asking out the sister or telling the one he was going out with). I can't recall that there was any great fall out between the parents.

she's interested apparently and same age

Friends of mine whose offspring are dating agreed just never to talk about the relationship between themselves. They just swerve the whole subject. It's working so far.

I understand why you might worry slightly about it. However, it doesn’t really matter whether you’re worried or not, because there’s nothing you can do about it 🙂

Yes I suppose if it doesn’t work out things might get a little awkward, especially if it all ends very badly and/or one or the other has behaved badly. But there’s nothing you can do about.

Sounds like normal teen life? I admire him for having the courage.

I would just keep out of it - 17 is nearly an adult!

Which is the mature thing to do.

Perfectly normal, what will be will be. People can’t go through life frightened of all the what if’s.

My kids call our family friends aunt or uncle and their kids cousins. This would be sort of incestuous in our circle unless it was just cousins going out together.

Yes it could be awkward but I don't think he should hold back because of it.

I agree,deal with any fall out if and when it happens.

Then yes. They are 17, nearly adults. He should ask away. If family friends can’t cope with a shift in their DC’s relationships, that is their problem. For now, it’s no big deal. Just one 17yo asking the other out/over for lunch. Don’t overthink it and just let them crack on.

Pretty normal I’d say and at least you know they’ve both been brought up well!

What?

Our family friends are like family. My kids call the adults aunt or uncle and refer to their kids as their cousins. It would be like taking your mum's sister's child to a romantic lunch date. It would be more than weird.

It reminds me of that research that shows kids who grow up in the same kibbutz dont typically marry.

He's 17. He doesn't need your permission or approval to ask any girl on a date, whether you know her parents or not.

Yes, it could be mildly awkward, but to be honest that's just something you'd have to navigate, and given that they're in their teens I doubt any awkwardness between you and your friends would endure for long, honestly.

My friend dated the son of her parents' family friends when she was 18 or 19. It lasted about two years I think? There was no awkwardness between the parents when they split.