To have turned back?

[whatthen]

My friend and I went for a walk in a large nature reserve this evening. After about 20 minutes of walking, a man appeared in front of us, having walked out of the bushes. He was carrying a bag and was walking unusually. I’m not sure how to describe it, shuffling maybe.

He stopped not far ahead of us and seemed to be looking at the view. My friend asked if I wanted water, clearly to give us an excuse to stop and ensure he stayed ahead of us. Whilst she was getting the water, he turned and stared at me, and I stared back, and he turned away and kept walking.

About 20 feet later, he turned and stared again. We were standing still, and my friend was still pouring water into my bottle. Another 20 feet later he did the same, turning around and looking, until he rounded a corner and disappeared from our sight.

We decided to turn around and walk back to the start, and walk a different route instead.

We were being over the top or would you have done the same? There was absolutely no one else around.

If it was more comfortable for you both why would it be unreasonable? There is no moral imperative to stick to a set route.

That’s true. I don’t know, I didn’t know if I was being silly. There were two of us and one of him. I wasn’t sure if I was being unnecessarily paranoid.

But it isn't about what might or might not have happened. It is about your comfort and enjoyment of the afternoon. Anyway prevention is better than cure etc.

I still feel quite shaken. Silly really given nothing happened.

Your instincts are there for a reason.

It might well be it was nothing, and perhaps 99 times out of 100, it will be nothing. But clearly, sometimes, you get spooked because your brain is telling you a situation isn't safe, and it's right.

You went with your gut feeling. That's what it's there for, and going back was the right thing to do. I would have.

Trust your instincts!
Someone looked back at me like that...totally creepy. I snuck ahead and saw him getting off his bike and hiding behind a tree, just around a bend.
I ran like the clappers in the opposite direction.
Trust your instincts.

Thank you. I did think that if he was going to do something he could’ve walked over and done it, but he didn’t. But it wasn’t normal behaviour either.

Feel surprisingly shaken up by it given nothing happened.

That must have been terrifying for you!

That’s what I was worried about - that he’d gone into more bushes once he was out of our eyeline.

Something did happen, you were in a lonely place and had a sense that you might be in danger. Perhaps the man was completely harmless, but you had that sense so of course you are shaken.

Thank you!

I had such a scary experience whilst walking my cocker spaniel. I live a remote area, there is farmland, designated footpaths and we all know each other.

I was walking up a lane and a car passed me, going a bit speedily and then the car stopped and began reversing. I was horrified! I turned into a property, with a locked gate, called out “hello” while he continued to reverse and then reverse into the drive. They weren’t in and then he turned and went back the way he had come. Obviously he had made a wrong turn, but I was mortified. Never forget that. I was really shaken and told the whole village, everyone was really understanding.

OP, I totally understand how you felt!

That must have been really scary for you.

It was the repeated turning to stare/look at us. I walk there quite often and usually alone, and men mostly say hello or smile or nod, which I take to be them subconsciously letting me know they’re friendly, which I realise isn’t fool proof but is ‘normal’. This behaviour was not normal.

I agree and was going to say that usually if I come across someone there is an interaction. I passed a man standing at the top of the lane and as I approached he smiled and said hello. It is not a guarantee but…

What can we do? I walk my dear cocker - not a guard dog - everyday. I love the isolation but we do have to keep our wits about us. Making the decision to turn back was the right one.

My cocker is a rescue, he was abandoned, and might have been ill treated.

Once we were in the field and the farmer was in the field on his tractor, he is our neighbour, but my boy is not used to this and started barking like mad, another time there was a car parked in the middle of another field, I made enquiries and it was another farmer, again my boy started barking. Maybe there is a bit of a guard dog in there.

OP, you are shaken, it most probably will effect
your sense of freedom. But continue to enjoy your walks.