Holidays are just not worth the money

[Phonicshaskilledmeoff]

Holidays are just not worth it.

The kids are desparate to go on holiday. I struggle to see the value though. For the 5 of us an abroad holiday is about £3k minimum. I struggle to get over the cost whilst I’m there - £500 a day and I sit wondering whether it was worth it.

The kids are excellent travellers and beautifully behaved when on holiday so it’s nothing to do with them. I just think it’s insanely expensive for what you actually get.

I enjoy it whilst I’m there - how do I stop being a cheap killjoy?!

Like other PPs for us holidays have always been an absolute priority. Having dedicated family time to make memories is priceless and the DCs regularly talk about the things we did on holidays. We've always had a dedicated holiday fund that builds up over the year so it's not a single big spend.

We've been lucky that we've been able to afford foreign holidays every year with 2 DCs. But we cut our cloth. The first few years we very budget (flights booked the minute they were released and basic villa properties from Vrbo etc). Over the years we've been able to up our budget so have gone for nicer properties. Always saw the locals sights and mixed that with pool time for the kids.

Of course holidays (particularly abroad) can be expensive but only you can decide if the money is worth it.

Our DCs have now started going on holiday with friends paid for by their part-time jobs.

Is it though? For 5 people? I was thinking 3k is pretty cheap! I want somewhere with food cooked for me and a lovely atmosphere. I’d rather stay at home than a cheap self catering place

OP would you say this is about the price or the principle? What I mean is, if people could help you cost an abroad trip for say 2.5k instead of 3k would that make it easier to feel it's worthwhile, or would you still think this is a huge amount of money and I could've done X to the house/pension/new car fund/had a family day out every couple of weeks for a year with it?

We spent a lot on holidays when the DC were growing up. But it was never about just the week/fortnight. The (age appropriate) planning and researching of the location, learning about the country, prepping, such as swimming lessons to be able to swim in the sea, learn a bit of the language etc was a bit of a family project which, together with the memories after (sorting photographs, conversation about what we'd done) lasted most of the year in a low key but fun way, so was actually great value for money.

I love holidays but agree they are super expensive if you are buying for a whole family. We didn’t go far when mine were young as I was a single parent. I took them to stay with friends and family who are scattered over the country for a break from home - or caravan holidays out of the summer holiday - we went May half term quite often.

Now they are grown they are taking themselves away and I am taking nice holidays abroad where I only have to pay for myself. My last trip was to Yellowstone, staying with friends who live out there.

We took ours to Eurocamp a few times when younger, much more reasonable. Drive to ferry, then you have your own car in France or Spain. Best prices are out of school holidays, but were pretty reasonable at May half term or Easter. Kids get stuff to do, swimming pools etc. we would alternate that with sightseeing. You can split locations too.

Don't go abroad. There are some fantastic places in the UK for holidays.

For what it's worth, I think schoolchildren should be allowed two weeks off per year during term time, to be taken whenever. There could be rules put in place, like it has to be planned and the teacher knows about it two months in advance, and the family/children have to take all the responsibility for catching up on the missed work, but it would be doable, and it would alleviate a lot of stress. Of course some people would abuse it, but why should they be allowed to spoil it for everyone?

sorry I live for my holidays. husband self employed aswell as small farm with cattle and horses. myself who alsos works long hours ( main breadwinner too) and has a long term chronic pain condition I need something to look forward too. to wake up without having to rush outside to do something or log into work to not have to cook dinner do washing all the mundane tasks of every day life and to have a week or 2 not in pain is pure bliss. they don't have to cost 3k ( I get that as a family of 5 it is expensive) but there are so many ways you can do it cheaply- takes time I know. there is camping house swaps air b and b etc. yes with young kids you are stuck with certain activities but as get older they can do more. pick a place that is near a town with stuff to do aswell as beach and pool. it's middle of June and last night I had the heating on for a bit as it was cold. we going to have today and tomorrow nice then back to rain for approx 2 weeks Monday onwards according to our forecast I am counting down the days till I walk off a plane and feel the blast of heat on me

If the kids love it, surely that is the value?

Try and focus on their enjoyment, especially if you know you’ll enjoy it whilst you are there.

We only took DD abroad every few years but my parents lived in a nice seaside location, so I found it very hard to justify spending a large chunk of our (limited) disposable income on a week in the sun. The weather might be a bit more hit and mess here, but I was willing to take that chance and have money to be used throughout the year.

City breaks were never that attractive as we not big 'culture vultures' (for want of a better term) either.

Why too old? Adults can still go on holiday with their parents! I'm 40 and I've been away with my parents and my daughter recently.

The problem is usually incompatible views on what a holiday is.

If you fantasise about relaxing with a book, that's going to be stressful with kids wanting to splash around in a pool.

So my advice is to lean into the chaos while they're young, do cheaper UK-based trips and utilise holiday clubs during school hols to preserve some annual leave days for relaxing adult days.

I think there is value in a staycation: book a cleaner, do a luxury food shop, buy some new toys and games and do local day trips for a week.

I’ve always loved travel. Husband and I spent most of our 20s travelling around the world. Now mid 40s with 2 boys 13 & 18 we have been fortunate to take them on many a lovely trip. Experiences and travel in my opinion are so enriching and I know we won’t have this time with them forever before they won’t want to come with us anymore. It may be a lot of money but you can’t buy back those days

I think holidays are absolutely worth it. I have a very stressful, full on job and having time to properly relax and spend time with DH and DS is amazing.

We have been abroad but also have brilliant times in the UK. We adore the lake district and we are going during the summer.
We will enjoy relaxing, visiting towns/Gardens and most of all heading onto the fells for walks with spectacular views. We will have some meals out and some in the cottage - DS is 12 and still loves a 'picnic' tea 😂

@Havingasmashingtime why is he too old? My parents joined us on holiday for 2 days whilst we were in the UK. My own children came on holiday with us last year, again UK break and at the time were 22 and 19 year old boys.

The holidays we had have created some incredible memories, from days out to the once in a lifetime holiday. It is dedicated family time away from home and most of the time with meals provided so no one is shopping for food or cooking as much as they would be at home.

I think having 5 in the family is probably where this is costing you more. Even if you manage to add an extra bed it just means less room.

I don’t think 3k is bad tbh, it’s the 5k plus for a week that I just wouldn’t pay.

We had a number of AI holidays when our kids were young that were a total waste of money. Sunbed wars being the absolute drain of the holiday in particular. I’m sure the kids enjoyed it but kids will enjoy anything.

I think camping or caravanning is probably the cheapest and best thing you can do for primary aged children. They love it. Although it’s hard work for the adults.

Hot holidays work better the more exclusive and the more you pay. Agree with the villa suggestion but again, that requires villa money.

I totally get you op.

This can’t be real - who the fuck spends £500 a day during a holiday?

“Going on holiday” is like saying “eating out”, there are infinite ways to do it and not all of them involve sitting in a villa. Surely the key is to find the things you enjoy doing and do that! For some people that will involve climbing up Mount Etna and for others it will mean flopping by a swimming pool. Holidays are about history, culture, cuisine, exercise, geography, wildlife, architecture, whatever you want them to be.

My parents used to take us youth hostelling or camping, even once on a road trip in the USA where we slept in dodgy motels, all on a shoestring, and it opened my eyes to a world beyond our Home Counties cul de sac.

Don't be so sure! My DC are all adults now, and there's not been a year yet that I haven't been away with one or all of them and GC too. The combinations might change, so city break with just DS2, big extended family with everyone, DD, me and DGC etc. But the foundations of travel being enriching and a family bonding experience have lasted. DD and I talk about the cruises we will go on when she's retired and I'll be in my 80s!

Oh I'm the total opposite I think they are worth every penny. We all love holidays and the break away from the normal daily grind of work/school and cleaning/cooking. We have a great time together.

The trouble is that uk holiday weather is so unpredictable which is why people go abroad. Such a shame really as there are some Beutiful places to visit many of which outshine some of the places we have been when abroad. But Greece here we come in September!

Seems to me you pick the wrong sort of holiday. Loved ours when dds were young, but they were water babies so anywhere with warm sea and a warm pool was their heaven. (Dh and I loved the sea, too.).
We didn’t do ‘culture’ when they were children.

It sounds like you all have a good time so you do see the value in that sense. Do you think you could be concerned about finances generally or with the price of things rising?