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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU

11 replies

fedupifit · 12/06/2026 21:59

my partner (child’s father) I find controlling sometimes.

he works 9-5 Monday to Friday. I work from home part time and do all the mum duties and school runs etc cooking every night. I’m also up with our 18 month old in the night still.

my partner helps in the house & he’s a good provider but I feel it’s coming at a cost.

example: last weekend I was just so tired. All house jobs were done, toddler was napping, dinner was slow cooking and I fell asleep on the sofa for an hour.
he said I’m not spending my weekends with you having a nap it’s boring ??? Next day he went for a nap (I don’t care)

yesterday I’d been up all night almost with poorly toddler. In the morning I did school runs, my work, house work and then I put TV on for toddler for a bit so I could do some emails. He text me asking what baby was doing and went absolutely mad because the cartoon wasn’t educational enough. I explained it’s just a bit of entertainment for a short period I’m exhausted.
he messaged shit all day telling me I’m a bad lazy mum & his son deserves better.

this is just 2 examples of the stupid control crap I deal with him every single week.

if our 18 month old gets in our bed for a cuddle he’ll storm off downstairs & sleep on the sofa

if I have a night light on at night he moans. We have to have sleeping conditions his exact way. No compromise.

to ight I’ve finally snapped at him & told him to fuck off. I’ve had enough of the nit picking ok trying my best for everybody I really am.

I don’t have any family. Just very old grandparents no friends really I’m so lonely inside

OP posts:
Notabarbie · 12/06/2026 22:04

You're definitely not being unreasonable and he's a dick.

You will be so much happier without him. I promise.

Bloody well done. Your little boy won't grow up hearing his mum spoken to so poorly.

TeaPot496 · 12/06/2026 22:05

He is horrible x

Decacaffeinatednow · 12/06/2026 22:09

He’s dreadful.
What’s your housing situation?

fedupifit · 12/06/2026 22:12

He had his house, I had my house. He kept his house on as investment and to do it up & rent. He was going to move into mine but I don’t want his name on it now no way.

OP posts:
Decacaffeinatednow · 12/06/2026 22:17

Claim child support.
Is he on the birth certificate?

Gardenisablooming · 12/06/2026 22:19

Take a step back and simplify things. He needs to move out.. You need to claim cms. He needs to know you have higher standards.
I guarantee if he has dc unsupervised the telly will be the childcare..

DietCoke247 · 12/06/2026 22:25

fedupifit · 12/06/2026 22:12

He had his house, I had my house. He kept his house on as investment and to do it up & rent. He was going to move into mine but I don’t want his name on it now no way.

Fabulous set-up. Send him packing back to his own pad. Sorry OP but you’ve picked a rotter.

You sound like you’re totally on top of things on a day-to-day basis (even though it’s 24/7). He’s just spoiling it for you. Get rid.

mumofoneAloneandwell · 12/06/2026 22:25

How many children do you have?

This man isnt fit to be your partner or your children's step dad

Please think of them

Fatiguedwithlife · 12/06/2026 22:34

mumofoneAloneandwell · 12/06/2026 22:25

How many children do you have?

This man isnt fit to be your partner or your children's step dad

Please think of them

He is the father of her 1 year old

whippersnapper55 · 12/06/2026 23:14

I don't use the word often but it's appropriate here - he sounds like a right cunt! Tell him to pack his bags and get out of your house. I guarantee you'll be a LOT happier. You really do deserve so much better than him.

Jopo12 · 13/06/2026 00:18

This is not a healthy relationship. Please get rid of him out of your life asap

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