Definitely more trivial / light hearted / first world problems, but AIBU to be fed up of online independent / boutique shops? I should I’m talking about clothing mainly.
I’m trying to buy less / better and as fast fashion isn’t cheap anymore I’m trying to be more conscious and buy say 1 nice thing rather than 3-5 things.
obviously with online shopping for clothes the ability to return is critical as you can’t see and feel the fabric, see how it actually fits and drapes on you as you can’t try on until you buy. I’m not in London/SE so the only way I can access these businesses are online where I can’t see and try things on in a shop. A lot of these shops are online only anyway to keep overheads down. And if I’m spending what to me is a lot of money on one item, I want to be 100% in love and happy with my purchase as I can’t justify it otherwise.
I’m getting increasingly frustrated with the small / independent shops, often because:
my main bugbear is they often do not follow consumer rights legislation for online shopping, eg if things are on sale or discounted they exempt from returns/refunds which is not legally allowed - I believe the only things excluded from returns are bespoke/commissioned items or perishable (eg edible) goods but I’ve seen so many small shops exclude far more than the legislation permits and I don’t want to get into an argument with someone over it so am put off buying in the first instance for a lot of shops.
For those that do “permit” refunds they impose stricter conditions than legislation - eg you have to notify them within 48 hours of receipt in order to qualify and then 7 days to return (where the legislation I believe does not restrict the “notification” period in this way - it is 14 days notification then a further 14 days to return). I often tend to notify and want to return much quicker than legislation anyway so I can get a refund quicker, but if you’ve had a busy few days or the item arrives when you’re away for a weekend it feels quite stressful. The irony is I’m sometimes ready to go to the post office the next day after notification but I’m waiting on their reply to my email requesting a return with the address / confirmation before I can actually post it so that adds further delay.
They’ll often dispatch sporadically at their convenience so planning/calculating to ensure you’re around for the delivery isn’t an exact science either which adds to the 48 hour return notification window stress.
you get guilt tripped into wanting a refund if the item doesn’t fit/suit/look as described or simply if you don’t want it as in real life it doesn’t justify the cost. For example once, after two failed repairs (that I didn’t even want as I knew it was a faulty item but I felt guilt tripped into rather than my right to an actual refund) I had to quote the legislation and say if they refuse I’ll have no choice but to chargeback at which point they begrudgingly accept
the photos of the clothing are often too artfully styled and photographed so you can’t actually tell their size / shape / fit drape or sometimes even the correct colour, or there will only be 1-2 blurry (not full frontal /back shots) so you can’t clearly see the item.
size guides are inconsistent and often run much smaller than they say / they appear
despite touting “slow fashion” things are often not any better made than fast fashion eg seam detail, reinforcing, fabric quality
on fabric in particular I’m fed up of everything being too sheer/see through so not suitable for work
For balance I add that some independent shops are not like this at all and have lovely personal service, genuinely beautiful items and those are the ones where I would continue to shop and support with.
But I’m wary of everything being great until there is an issue - the two repair example above I had purchased 5 items from them, no returns prior, in the last year so was a good/repeat customer to then be made to feel like I was trying to rip off a one woman shop (returns cost small businesses I know but this shouldn’t be held over genuine customers) because some seaming split on a top I wore for the first time - I’d had no issues with other products so it was clearly a manufacturing defect but I was gaslight into being denied a refund although I did eventually succeed.
I want to support small / independent businesses and slow fashion but the attitude I sometimes get from their polices alone puts me off so many sites I don’t even risk purchasing.
And yes, I know I’ll get told the most sustainable thing is buying less/nothing or going to charity shops and I do try to do this but I don’t have lots of good charity shops near me, and sometimes I want and need specific clothing eg for work or if my size fluctuates. I’m not going to name and shame any shops in particular and yes there are bigger problems in the world but I wanted to know if others felt the same?
and if there were any recommendations for small businesses with beautiful clothing that don’t have this attitude? I certainly don’t want to return what I buy (it costs me time/money in postage and I don’t want to negatively impact small businesses) but I do want the option to return given I’ve not tried the item on or seen it in real life. My budget isn’t huge - I can go to Toast style pricing or slightly higher if I think it’s worth it but not on the regular and it would be a big treat for me.
at this point it’s been a mixed experience with the independents so in addition to buying a lot less, I admit I’ve returned to the big brands for online clothes shopping when I do get the urge/need, and it’s much easier!