to think bad photos aren’t friendly?

[nervousnellie90]

I went out with a few girlfriends recently for drinks. One of them instigated taking ‘candid’ photos of eachother with our drinks. The two other girls proceeded to take these for eachother but I said i didn’t want any. One of the girls started taking pictures of me any way and badgering me to pose even though I had said no in the first place and was clearly uncomfortable being put under pressure to do it.

Later both girls shared their pictures from the night and one had taken two really nice ones of the girl that was taking our photos. When she put our friends on they were not as flattering as hers (but she had been joking around when she was posing) and she’d taken 4 of her. She then dropped in 13 photos of me that were all really unflattering and as they went along she had continued to zoom in on my face closer and closer. The worst part of it is you can see how uncomfortable I am in the pictures and i’m literally looking at the floor for most of them!

I feel like that’s a really dick move, or am i being unreasonable?!

It all sounds extremely childish. Are you all actually old enough to drink?
Perhaps you should find a new friendship group who can go out and enjoy themselves without wasting the night taking photos.

I agree OP. It’s just the norm now. Makes it harder to relax when you’re waiting to be subjected to the next ‘candid’ photo!

friends do this to me semi-often and I absolutely hate it.

I absolutely love that camera phones and social media were not a thing until my 30s.

I do feel sorry for the youngsters these days, nothing is private; a night out with your mates can’t just be that, it has to be shared as global news!

Yanbu
I noticed a friend was careful to only post flattering pictures of her self but would cheerily share the worst pictures of everyone else. It made me see her really differently

Well if people didn't buy into this nonsense that everything has to be photographed then it wouldn't be the norm.
I can't understand why people just aren't bored witless by looking at photos of themselves constantly. Surely self obsession has to have some limits?

Yes I agree. Breaks girl code.

Putting anyone’s photo on social media without their permission should be a criminal offence.

I hate this, but then I hate having my photograph taken to the point it’s bordering on a phobia.
I understand taking 1/2 pics of the group but why the constant photos? Just seems childish and vain to me, just enjoy the bloody event!

Chavs do this. Bin them off.

She is not your friend. Start to distance yourself from her.

I think it can be, but it depends on where the photo was taken. Public land you can take photos and publish. Private land you technically need permission on the owner. And it would be up to the venue owner to prosecute.

I can't remember what the laws are sorry, and thinking on it they might only apply to photos that are sold. No jail time involved, but orders to unpublish and pay comp I think.

It's a while since I read them, so I might be wrong now. Link here has the laws/rules.

Your Rights as a Photographer (UK) - Institute of Photography (institute-of-photography.com)

To be devils advocate (I’m not a fan of constant photos) I think some of my friends look lovely when not posing for photos with fake smiles and poses. They don’t agree. Maybe she thinks you look nice as you are?
But if you’ve said you don’t like them then I think they should stop

She’s not your friend.

Next time, accidentally drop her phone into your pint.

Thanks all, unfortunately this kind of petty behaviour is quite common from that one particular person! She quite often belittles others to pick herself up, I think. We are in our mid 30s so the picture taking is pretty normal among our peers. As much as I dislike it, I would let her off on that. It was just the quantity for me, particularly given that I’d said no. I could understand if it was a few and I just didn’t like them but there were so many and they were awful - as in my eyes were shut in every single one and I was sipping/ swallowing my drink so my mouth is full of liquid 🤣 - not just a little unflattering.
Have already been considering distancing from her as it’s just not the kind of behaviour that builds you up and that’s really what I want from friends! Way too grown to be dealing with this kind of stuff, it’s like being back at school whenever we meet. Nice to have a bit of clarity when it’s awkward to discuss with mutuals.