To be feeling past it at 37?

[rainbowsfromrain]

I’m 37 and in the past couple of years I’ve started to feel like I look older (and feel it!) I went shopping with my dad (74) the other day and someone thought we were a couple! I’ve just had a few comments that have made me feel like I must look older.

I was unwell a couple of years ago (mental health) I was hospitalised and I lost a lot of weight but now thanks to the medication which has helped me a lot - I have gained over 3st and 2 dress sizes in a year (I’m now 5’7 and 12st) I feel huge and miserable about it.
I just feel like I’ve blinked and I’ve gone from my late teens and turning heads, to being someone who people aren’t sure if I’m my kids mother or grandma!

My periods are lighter so I think I’m reaching perimenopause, I feel shattered all the time. I posted a photo of myself in a group “guess my age” and I got anywhere from my age to late 40s! Most days at some point I stop and think, bloody hell - I’m almost 40! I was 20 when my mum was 40 and that doesn’t seem long ago!

is this something a lot of people around this age go through?

If you can afford it, book yourself in for a hair overhaul and treat yourself to a few new outfits. Sounds shallow but that got me out of a funk and helped massively with confidence.

I am 38 and feeling something. I don't feel past it, or that i look old. I don't know what I am feeling but it's something.

My DS will be 20 this year so I think that has something to do with it.

I have put myself on a 2 year plan to 40. I've joined a gym having never stepped foot in a gym previously so booked PT sessions to build my confidence in using the machines. I am trying to eat a bit better (not to lose weight but just to eat better in general) I am making a little bit more effort to wear my "nice" clothes rather than saving them for an occasion.

I think I recognised I wasn't feeling great about myself so wanted to make changes for me.

Please don't post photos asking age, we live in a world where the internet is full of filters and unrealistic expectation. Take time to notice the real people walking around you.

If you suspect perimenopause, try get a Dr or nurse appointment? My surgery has a dedicated peri/menopause nurse and she is wonderful.

Im 58 so the thought of feeling past it at 37 is bonkers to me!

I think this is more about your health and weight, and maybe life stage, than age per se. Hopefully you can regain your mojo.

And 37 seems young for peri to me. Remember the average age for menopause is 51 (my periods only stopped at 55 - 55!- because i had the Mirena coil fitted!). Yes, peri can go on a long time and menopause can be younger etc etc but I dont think it's the go-to explanation.

I am 38 and have been feeling exactly the same last couple of years.

Had my hair dyed at a salon a couple of months ago for the first time which helped a little as my greys were getting out of control and definitely made me feel bad.

I am struggling though. Think I need new clothes, better diet, more exercise but struggling to make it happen.

Found it difficult finding new clothes that look good on me and that I like. I very much do comfort eat. Have never exercised in my life until recently where I am making more attempts which do help when I do it but struggling to make it a habit.

Getting enough sleep more regularly and self care are things I could improve too but is also something I just have never spent much time on and don't really know where to start.

No answers, but definitely in the same boat.

Gently, you aren’t even 40.
What does past it even mean? Past what? You’ve so much more ahead of you if you look for it.

Lacking confidence doesn't help either. I booked and paid for a pilates class for over lunch today. Got there 1 minute late and it was full with no spare mats. I felt awkward so just left...

Nobody who knows me in real life would think I lack confidence in myself as it doesn't show when I am in my comfort zone, but I do massively lack confidence with anything new or outside of my norm.

37 isn’t over the hill - I got married at 40 and think late 30s I was at my peak! Two kids, developing type 1 diabetes and the loss of my DH since then and now at 64 am feeling it. But I scrub up well!
Get yourself moving, overhaul your eating if you can to lose some weight and definitely think of a new haircut and some beauty treatments to focus on getting yourself feeling better health wise and in appearance. Carving out time for yourself - you are as important as anyone else in your life, so make yourself a priority.

Definitely not 'past it' at 37
A few tweaks to lifestyle and clothes +attitude ..
Sorted 👗👛👠🍓🥝🥦🥒🏊

Honestly, I think loads of us go through this in our late 30s. One day you feel young, and the next you're wondering where the years went!

You've been through a lot with your health, medication, weight changes and hormones, so it's no surprise you're feeling different. And for what it's worth, someone thinking you and your dad were a couple says more about them than it does about you!

Be gentle with yourself. You're 37, not old, and I suspect you're seeing yourself far more critically than other people do.

I thought I was too young for peri at 37. Went to GP and referred to gynae just in case -both confirmed in was “just” peri and completely normal. I asked them both was I not too young. Both said No, not at all. My mum had symptoms from 36 gradually getting worse til last period at 48. That’s just how it is for some women. There’s a big range for how it goes.

Excellent suggestion!

I agree that menopause is not always the answer.
But it's interesting that you are using your late menopause as proof of that when it is just as likely to have early menopause (before 45) as it is to have a late menopause (after 55).
It's interesting as a society we talk about 45 to 55 as something definite when one in five women will be outside that range.