AIBU to struggle trusting the GP about DC? Health anxiety related…

[Mumbythesea1]

I have health anxiety. Before children I worried incessantly about myself and DH. When we had children it transferred to this plus worrying constantly about the kids. I am on medication and have had CBT but I need help.
my issue is trusting health professionals. For example, if I had an issue dismissed by the GP about myself I would pester until they do further tests or scans etc.
however my problem is when this is about DC. My son has a lump on his arm and I took him to the GP. GP showed me how freely it moved and said it’s a fatty lump. He said he wasn’t concerned at all. Every bone in my body wants to push for a scan to check this but DH has said that asking for this would be puttting my anxiety on DS and I should trust the GP.

How can I stop behaving like this? How can I accept what the GP says and not put my worry into my DC?

This is nothing to do with your GP or your child. You need to get treatment for your health anxiety. (Your GO, obviously, would be the first step!)

You need to get yourself some professional help.... thats the only way. You need to learn to manage your anxiety.

Can your DH take over doctors appointments for your children while you work on your MH? This clearly causes you huge anxiety and this is preventing you from being sensible. And yes, you will project this onto them and that isn’t fair.

It isn’t your fault but perhaps this is an aspect of parenting that you need to let him take the lead on right now while you get better.

I usually do get DH to do medical appointments. Unfortunately this is the same even when he takes them. I grill him about what was said and push him to get the GP to do further testing.
I have had CBT and counselling and am on medication and I don’t know what else to try! X

Realistically in this example, even if your son had a scan, and it proved the GP was correct, you'd still find something else to want like bloods or further testing etc. It doesn't matter if it is a small issue or a big issue, you just get anxious.

Clearly whatever medication you are on, isn't working so first port of call is go back an get this relocked at. And take your husband with you to advocate because given the nature of your complaint, you might not be in the best position to deal with the GPs suggestions.

Long story short; You need to learn to live with doubt.

Sign up for another round of CBT ASAP.

Your husband is right, OP. You admit yourself that you have health anxiety, so deep down you know there is nothing wrong with your child. Pushing for further action is 1) a massive waste of public resources, 2) disrespectful of the doctor's professional ability and 3) going to pass on unnecessary fear/worry to your child.
You need help and support to manage your own situation, but keep your children out if it.

Let your husband take the lead on health issues, OP. You acknowledge that your judgement isn't reliable on this subject.

Your husband needs to be firmer with you and stop allowing you to grill him. Pandering to your health anxiety won’t help you in the slightest.

It isn’t your fault hut you beed to throw everything at sorting this out. And if that means stepping back from being involved in your children’s medical care until you are well enough to participate in a healthy and mature way, so be it.

You need to get some more help for your anxiety and you DH needs to stop pandering to you anxiety as well, even if it ends up in an argument.