AIBU to take sick leave when I am completely exhausted?

[Wineandrun]

AIBU to take some time off?

I work four days a week from home and am studying part time. I have three young kids, two with ADHD/SEN. I have some health issues going on which mean I can’t eat without vomiting and I’m anaemic (being investigated, but means I’m exhausted). Husband is brilliant but works full time out of the house and often away (this cannot change). I’m so tired. And feel so unwell. I just need to stop but I feel really guilty. Husband thinks because I can sit at my desk I shouldn’t have time off. I have zero downtime from the minute I get up to the minute I go to bed. I need a week to let my body try and recover. Should I just power through? I’m worried if they do find something wrong with me I’ll need time off then and will regret taking time now.

You describe your dh as brilliant but then go on to say he works away which can’t change, and also that he was utterly unsupportive, dismissive and downright nasty about the fact you’re getting knackered in your desk job.

is it possible you’re one of the too many women whose bar for men is so low that if they so much as push a baby on a swing for five minutes, they’re described as brilliant? Is your parenting 50/50?

I mean, maybe he’s great and just not very supportive here, or maybe he’s not great at all and the root of your exhaustion.

I don't disagree entirely, but recovery is a thing? Getting the rest you need to continue is just as valid as any other form of sickness or adjustment.

I think you misunderstand me.

If she takes the time to rest and then returns to work in exactly the same circumstances, she’ll be in the same exhausted position again. She needs to be spending time thinking about what she can put in place to help so she can cope.

Book 2 weeks parental leave

It sounds like studying alongside work is too much. I would look at putting this on hold before work. There are things that take priority over work (eg: health, family) but also things work should take priority over (eg: studying). I think I would judge a colleague who took time off work due to burn out but was continuing to fill their time with studying. Drop the course, obviously if after you’re dropped optional extras you’re still burnt out it would then be very reasonable to take time off work.

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