Genuinely how does this happen?

[Confusedebf]

I’ve seen anecdotes on Instagram about people’s babies / toddlers twiddling the other nip while they feed and that being annoying or sore. My MIL also delights in telling me about this happening with her son, my DH (don’t get me started).

I literally don’t understand how this happens. I am ebf, I get one boob out of the bra, son feeds on that, I put it away, I get second boob out and swap over. Same with when I’m in a vest, lift up one side, etc.

genuinely what are people doing that means they’re getting their nips twisted by the baby?

I mean this lightheartedly , I’m honestly bemused not annoyed, I just find it so funny as a concept

It is a Nursing Manners thing. Like - don't let your baby do acrobatics when nursing.

Nursing necklaces were a Thing back then - baby had something to distract their hands.

I was very leaky so other boob was always secure and with a pad, but friends would sleep topless for easy boob buffet access and their babies would twiddle with the other nip.

I still have my 6 and 4 year old going for my nipples and my boobs haven’t been in work in years.

The baby puts their hand in your bra or top. It’s not rocket science.

I’m with you OP, it was never something my DS did, nor would he have had the opportunity to.

When it’s at toddler age (and beyond) I think it could be used to introduce the idea of bodily autonomy, ie: ‘No, Mummy doesn’t want to be touched like that unless it’s for milk’ kind of thing.

Each to their own though I guess.

Yeah I’m the same, I coslept a good bit but never just had them out for free access. Just baffling/amazing to me that’s how some people are doing it, maybe because I would soak the bed if I had both out!

Mine would always put one hand into my bra on the side I wasn't feeding on. They'd twist, push all the way in, or pull with surprising strength.

but why would you let them though? That’s what I find odd, move the hand before they get to the nip?!

I bf 2 children and never had this happen.

Wow. Did you find it really annoying or not bothered? Was it a pick your battles kind of thing?

Yes this
I breastfed all 3 kids and no fondling of the other nipple ever took place and I had lots of friends who breastfed too I find that a bit weird!

They just put their hand in or you’re topless maybe due to the heat or just out the shower etc.

one of mine did this but I just moved her hand away. I didn’t mind that much tbh but it would be slightly painful

My son just started rooting around with his free arm and the rest is history. Now if he can’t access the other boob to twiddle he’ll get so upset. It’s just a comfort thing ❤️

And when I try to stop him he’ll just tug on it which hurts way more so I just let him crack on!

I mean, yes, sometimes I would remove their hand when it was particularly irritating, but it was annoying to have to reposition my grip of my book or phone. Sometimes it wouldn't bother me all that much. I fed all of them until they were about 15mo.

If they tried to fiddle when I wasn't feeding then it was a swift 'no!'.

Your hands are often full, or your focus is on baby staying calm and getting fed, rather than having a scrap.
One of mine used to thumb suck and the spare hand would twiddle his own ear (or someone else’s ear if he was being held).
The other used to go for a tummy button- his own or someone else’s.

They are like little octopuses. The spare hand needs to twiddle!

There was a thread about a very similar thing a long while ago. I’m in the it’s weird camp. However, the other thread was even weirder because the baby (actually toddler), would go over to the grandma, put their hands down her bra and fiddle with her nipples to soothe! Sooo many posters thought this was okay! 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

You've clearly never had a persistent nipple twiddler baby then clearly 🙄
Its a bit like telling someone that your baby sleeps 12hrs every night so you dont understand why someone else let's their baby wake 5 times for a feed ....... we'll done you!

I’ve breastfed 3 babies and never had this happen, I wouldn’t have allowed it

I suppose I thought - and clearly perhaps this is wrong - that if you don’t let them start then they won’t learn it’s there to twiddle?

Yeah I get that, I think I would have nipped it in the bud early on, but fair enough ! I understand wanting to let them comfort themselves, i’d just hate it too much haha

Fair enough!! Thanks for the insight genuinely interesting!

my jaw dropped at this aaahhhjj

I don't have a choice. Mine would fight me to the death to get his hand on my opposite nipple. The only rule I have managed to enforce (with varying degrees of success depending on his mood), is his hand has to be flat and not moving.

Some babies and young toddlers will shove their hand in before you can grab it - especially if you already have your hands full/are distracted. And if they're really trying with all their strength, and start crying, arching, or struggling (sometimes accidentally biting down/dragging on the nipple they're feeding from in the process) then it can be easier to just let them grab.

I tried to train mine out of it with variable success, as it really irritated me - wearing a chunky necklace and directing them towards fiddling with that, or giving them a toy, sometimes helped, but not always.

I think some babies/toddlers are just very fixated and determined in that way, and others are more placid.