How about you break this down. I’m not an expert and others will have much better advice.
One child is hard and a full time job. You have 4 so you are doing 4 full time jobs.
Firstly I would see your GP and although anti depressants have their place / and could help the reality is you need to check your iron levels, TSH levels and blood sugar. And ask for the actual results not just to hear they are normal. What the NHS judges is normal is not necessarily what optional is.
Second of all you need to get someone in for a day or two days or longer and pay them to clean the house top to bottom.
Decluttering and labelling helps enormously.
House rules and everything having a home.
Everyone eats the same thing. This time of year - salads, ham, couscous etc jug of water in the table
Play the tidy up game with kids as part of their routine eg music on and ten minutes to tidy everyone does it.
Carve out time alone eg 30 minutes on bath with a book no one is allowed to disturb you unless the house is on fire. Ear phones in etc
do not beat yourself up looking after one child 24/7 is a full time job - you have 4.
Your husband can either put up and take all 4 kids for a week whilst you go to stay with a friend and turn your phone off and recover or shut up saying anything negative. & When he is home he is the ‘go to’ parent as the end of your daily shift is over. And I would struggle that ever single day you go for a walk. He gets in and you go for a 30 minute walk rain or shine and breathe and tell him you need this. Tell him he gets breaks at work and you bloody well need one.
Regarding homework or story, pick a time - and divide and rule eg eldest gets one on one time and a board game with one of you and the other one reads the same bedtime story to all of them and then they can each have an age appropriate audio story book whilst in bed.
Everyone is in bed by 8 pm end of. 11 years old maybe 9.30