To ask you what the area you live in is actually like?

[Lilypad789]

I have young children (8,9) I do not allow them to play out with friends yet as this would usually entail crossing a busy road. So I walk them to the park, sometimes arranging to meet a school friend etc. I sometimes stay and scroll my phone for a bit and watch from a distance while they play or occasionally I will do a small 10 minute walk and circle back round before watching them for a while.

Even if I (and more adults sometimes) are sat watching our kids most of the other kids are awful and it’s so depressing. Swearing snd screaming and just being absolutely stupid. I dread to think what they’re like if there's no adults there to be honest. I don’t want mine around it anymore (not naive, 100% know they would join in a bit but my youngest has moved away from them before because she doesn’t like it and they’re her school friends!) and I’m considering moving house. We do live in an underprivileged area but to be honest in the villages and towns around us I can’t imagine it being any different.

What is it like where you live? Other countries / counties.

At this point I’m considering the Highlands!

I live in rural North Wales. When I said that I was moving here, a lot of people got the area up on Google Maps and were horrified about how green and rural it is! My sibling, on an enforced visit by our mother, said in disgust, "It's the a* end of nowhere around here!" It's very safe- to the point that quite a few of us don't lock our doors- and not much happens around here. You're more likely to see more farm animals, pheasants and rabbits than you are to see a person if you take the dog out for a walk. The biggest social event of the year is the annual sheep shearing event. If it snows, the children go sledging down the hills of the farm around us. If it's fine weather, they're off cycling.

The local primary school usually has around 20-30 children on roll at any time. It seems to be a good place to raise a family, but I imagine that teenagers would probably find it quite boring... hence why a neighbour's two are so into riding their bikes to go and see friends, or pop into the nearest town.

However, if you're looking at heading north, some of the Scottish islands would tempt me to move there in a heartbeat!

This is my understanding of outer London too. I would like to live in splendid isolation tbh.

Most of the towns/villages near me are plagued with the antisocial behaviour of shitty kids. I genuinely wouldn't know where to go to avoid them.

We're in an affluent part London zone 2. Life is very busy and touristy here. None of the local kids play out. They go on pre-arranged play dates, do lots of extracurriculars and holiday camps, and are taken out to attractions. It's buzzy and fun and everything you could ever want is on the doorstep, from flagship parks, destination shopping, world-class culture and attractions and any sport or hobby you can think of. I really love it but many people would find it too busy.

There's a rough edge to it - lots of local drug and homelessness issues, stabbings and pockets of deprivation. My dcs go to a fee-paying school and are in a bit of a bubble away from that.

Maybe I'm missing something but I'm struggling to understand what's so bad about kids being sweary and letting off steam. Surely the park/common is the place for that if there is one. I did grow up rough though, so maybe I'm just used to it.

I now live in a gentrified, leafy suburb of Manchester that's quite nice and very safe with loads for kids to do.

A shithole new town in the NE. Kids run riot and crime is high. Lots of racists as well. Hate living here and can’t wait to move

Also grew up in a village around 10 miles outside of Northampton, and feel very lucky with where i grew up, nice village, nice friends. Live in a similar size village but a different side of Northampton now, occasional antisocial behaviour but nothing major. Again feel lucky that I’ve been able to bring my children up in a nice area and they have nice friends.

Pretty rural, West Sussex. A few teenagers live in walking distance and both families are very nice. Never any trouble in the nearest village (that I hear of at least) but as soon as you start getting to towns then there are a few issues - mostly related to e bikes, littering and minor nuisances. I think there is more accountability in small communities, which leads to better behaviour.

We’re in a small town in Yorkshire about 40 minutes drive from the nearest seaside town and between two large cities. We have lovely country just around the corner and enough amenities for every day needs. We do have to go to the next nearest town, which is about 20 minutes drive for better shops and restaurants and bars although we have a couple of good restaurants and plenty of pubs, they’re just not that great, apart from one pub that does great food and has become our local.
We’ve become more aware of a few anti social behaviours at night in and around our high street, reportedly from teenagers from families who have been moved here from one of the cities. Nothing horrendous, like drug dealing or burglary but it has apparently been escalating over the last 8/9 months. This doesn’t impact us as we’re slightly out of the town centre and we’re not out late at night but I can understand why it’s becoming a concern for residents. Unfortunately there’s not enough for teenagers to do here and fortunately for us, we don’t have teens anymore who could get involved in it all. Overall, we’re really happy with where we live but I can understand how long term residents are getting very frustrated with teens who don’t appear to have boundaries or respect.

Definitely move. We moved from somewhere very well off to somewhere less so and candidly I’m missing the well off place now my kids are teenagers. I didn’t want them growing up in the snobbery and competition/one-upmanship of where we used to live (just outside London) but now they associate with a lot of people who have no aspiration, and it’s an uphill struggle keeping that going from home even though the school is good.

We're in a little village in the midlands, it was actually the village I'd vetoed because it was so rough when I was growing up.

I love the area of the village we're in, sometimes we encounter a group of gobby younger teens but considering we live right by a massive park it's very quiet and a nice place to raise kids, the other end of the village that connects to the town is a little rougher round the edges and the complaints on the local FB pages are nearly always from up that end.

The very quiet village I grew up in is muchnl rowdier now than the one I currently live in with kids smashing car windows and harassing the oaps so I'm glad we moved.

I’m the outskirts of SW London and on the whole it’s not like this. Not too far away it is though. As most big cities it’s diverse only around the corner. Where would you want to move to? Maybe then someone can offer specific advice.

SE London suburb. 20 mins on the train to London Bridge. It’s not bad. Could be a little tidier

I live in a Monmouthshire market town. It's lovely and quiet , hardly any crime , beautiful views , great GP surgery , neighbours keep themselves to themselves, as we do . No social housing anywhere near us , mostly families and retired people. It's wonderful.

Jersey. Very safe generally but we only have a toddler so the playparks we’re in at the moment are those for younger kids, not so much charging round screaming and swearing. There are the usual local complaints about teens but to be honest I haven’t really seen it.

A couple of times recently when I’ve been walking with DS we’ve passed bunches of lads (age 13 or 14 maybe) and they’ve seen him looking at them, he loves bigger kids especially boys, and offered him high-fives. Just recently there were some playing quite riotously with a football in a narrow side street, bouncing it off the walls either side and at least one yelled out for them to stop (which they did) as they saw me coming with the pushchair. Can’t complain!

If you’re in West Yorkshire have you considered Saddleworth? I live in a Saddleworth village and it’s great for kids.
Most of the kids I know are involved in organised sport ( look up the Saddleworth Olympics) or involved in brass bands - or both! That keeps them out of trouble and means they mix with different ages.
In the main, kids are polite and well behaved with some boisterous behaviour/swearing but nothing like where I grew up!

Thank you! I have older children and whilst it wasn’t perfect, I can’t believe how much it has changed in a decade. The behaviour these 8/9/10 year olds are displaying is what I used to see when my older ones were 14/15.

Peak District. Fucking lush!

Love it, my 9yr old is allowed to the park with friends, to walk to the shop if she’s with a friend, i walk her part way to school to a meeting point where she meets friends then they go the rest of the way.
She’s not allowed to the woods yet and won’t be for a while.
There is occasional issues with teens but if reported on the Village Facebook page it’s quickly addressed (assuming the parents or friends of the family see the post)
I’m in a village to the east of York. 20-25 minute regular buses into York, we have a weekly greengrocer, butcher and cake shed, a shop, doctors, dentist, cafe and bakery. Wouldn’t want to leave.

Manhattan. Very central. My street is mostly hotels and luxury stores. I don’t know how I ended up here. Feels like my 20 year-old self’s dream.

Pros: lots to do, everything on my doorstep, every weekend feels like a city break. No kids anywhere apart from babies in strollers.

Cons: Noisy, expensive.

village/small town in the South East. It’s nothing like you’ve described in your OP. We have lots of play parks that kids play in and hardly ever any trouble. Community centre with activities and cafe that people go to after school. Children’s centre with groups. Lovely primary school with good facilities and teachers, doesn’t seem short of funding but we’re in an affluent area so lots of donations.

I live in a lovely safe town called Nailsea in the SW. About 8 miles from Bristol. About 10 minutes drive from Clevedon (beach) about a 15 minute drive over the Bristol Suspension Bridge into Clifton. Kids went to outstanding schools and two of them loved it so much they went to Bristol University. One still at home. We live on the outskirts of Nailsea a 15-20 minute walk into the safe town centre. They have a 10 minute walk to the stables for Horseriding. Plenty of bike rides. Quick drive into Mendips and plenty of clubs and thriving community.

Great trains to London and its perfect really! I grew up here but the kids wanted to move here from Norfolk when they were about 6 - so we did.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nailsea

off to name change!

I’m in Lincolnshire. Rural village about 20 minutes from the nearest city. I bloody love it! Has everything we need: a shop, couple of pubs, nursery and primary school, park, swimming pool. Everyone speaks to eachother and is generally friendly. I look forward to waving to the same elderly folk outside their houses when I take my DD for a walk, they all know her by name. I saw the postman getting treats out of his pockets for cats the other day, it’s a lovely place to live

Honestly, this sounds perfect! I’m a teacher though and can’t imagine they’ll need many teachers if there’s only 20 students 😂

Thanks for being honest! I feel your pain. I feel like I’m better than most people around here and I don’t care how that sounds. I’m kinder, more open minded, want more for my children etc.