AIBU to report concerns after collecting toys from a very squalid house?

[Joeydoesntsharefood25]

Aibu to call social services about the house i just bought some toys off Facebook market place?
Went to collect some toys i bought. House is a state from the outside. Filthy curtains, stuff piled up in the windows, very run down. Man opened door and a dozen flies flew out the house. He handed me the toy took the money and left. And then I was hit with the smell. I looked at the toy and it was wet and sticky. Its a washable surface so I put it in a plastic bag in my car. After a few mins in the car the smell hit me. Animal urine. It was god awful. When I got home I dumped the lot in a bucket and covered it in bleach and hot water. I went to message the man to give him a piece of my mind and he has blocked me. Now I am really worried this man has a kid thats living in that state. An adult can choose to live in squalor but a child or an animal cant. Are there any social workers on here that can advise me? The only clue i have that there is a child is that he was selling toys. Now I am going to scrub myself in bleach because I dont think I will ever feel clean again.

Please never encourage inaction when you have zero professional experience. Look at the subsequent posts of social workers who are saying to absolutely refer.

Make sure you keep yourself safe too. If you have messaged this man he may have access to your profile. Just watch out for anything that could reveal your contact details, DC school etc.

I wonder if that will change.

I found this an interesting read - www.careknowledge.com/media/57516/sn06793.pdf

I thought Wales did?

I would say it's almost certainly a single man living alone aside from maybe a cat for company.
I would imagine his wife left with the children many years ago.
I would say that since the break up he has become severely depressed and let things slide drastically (hence the state of the house).
I would imagine he is unable to work due to mental illness and is trying to make some money from old toys that his child left behind and grew out of years ago.
That's what I can sense from this situation and I have been right on numerous occasions having lived through heartbreak myself. 💔

You have come up with quite a scenario there!

I am suffering from depression myself and feeling things very deeply at the moment. 😥

That sounds pretty concerning. I'd report it just in case. It could be a hoarder who's kids have long gone or they don't have any kids.

But it's true if there were kids there it doesn't sound a suitable environment and the family clearly need support or some involvement.

Surely traveller kids are protected by the same legislation as other kids though?

They are supposed to be in school (if not officially home ed) and there are very tight regulations about the hours under 16s can work.

Please refer. Safeguarding referrals are so important as it builds a chronology of concerns and your referral may make a difference!

Well, whoever it is he is clearly struggling. Did he speak at all? I wonder if it is appropriate to report to adult social services in the first instance?

@GingerdeadMan don’t disagree but I’ve worked with traveller families and a lot ‘home educate’ and yes the boys help in the businesses and certainly once high school age

I mean I didn't notice the smell until after he turned and left he was hovering by the door so came out immediately in my arrival to stop me getting closer than the gate. I barely said 2 words to him. But he probably watched my disgusted face as I realized shortly after and i had to root about in my boot for a bag to put it jn so it didn't touch my car. He has my name as a buyer. I have a distinctive name so in theory he could easily find me

He was a young man, late 20s I would say. He looked very unkempt.

He's blocked you though so I wouldn't worry too much about that.

So you haven’t phoned yet?

No, not on a Sunday. I'll ring tomorrow and will post an update if anyone's interested.

“Safeguarding is everyone’s business”
Please report. It could be nothing but you could make a real difference if a child is living there

So its rang Child protection and there is no child living there. I then rang Adult social care and there was a vulnerable adult there but he has moved to a nursing home and now the man lives there alone. I was starting to worry there was an elderly person living there or a dead body decomposing there with the amount of flies!! They will do a welfare call to the man living there to check if he needs support. Ive asked to remain anonymous so hopefully he wont know it's me. At least I can sleep now knowing that there isn't a child suffering.

I wouldn’t have assumed there was just because it was a toy. He could easily have found it on the ground or something.
This is why I wouldn’t buy stuff like this from total strangers online and go to their house.

Strange that they would tell you all that on the phone, usually it would be confidential and strange that they would know that there was no child at the address from a phone call without actually checking 😕

One small silver lining is the toys may be stolen, so he may not have actual children living there.

But I would report so that can be check for sure!

How could they have told you that so quickly? I have no experience of these things so maybe that’s how it works I don’t know.
I think you did the right thing but
I’m a bit concerned that you were going to message him to give him a piece of your mind - that’s unwise, what did you think that would achieve?

Exactly, what if he has a new partner with a child thats moved in or how do they know on a phone call that he doesn't now have a child living there how would they be aware of that information on one phone call.. like I said very strange

That's a relief there are no kids there. You'd think someone who was keeping children in that environment would be too ashamed to have strangers coming to their door.

The guy might not be well. But if he's just choosing to live in squalor I guess that's his choice.