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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think something isn’t a waste of money if you genuinely enjoy it?

64 replies

BreezyLemonShaker · 27/05/2026 17:23

I feel people label things as a “waste of money” quite quickly, but if you genuinely enjoy something and it adds value to your life, is it really a waste? Obviously this is within reason and assuming you’re not putting yourself under financial strain, but I do wonder whether enjoyment is undervalued when it comes to spending.

AIBU?

OP posts:
anyolddinosaur · 29/05/2026 07:25

The problem is those who happily spend money on whatever luxury they fancy but then wont put their hand in their pocket for their round or complain that they cant afford to buy a house or pay for their kid at university. Spend all you like but dont then moan about how other people should be taxed more so that you can afford your luxuries.

Designer sunglasses v spear fishing - one lasts you, hopefully, several years and protects your eyes from cataracts later in life (but non designer sunglasses would do the same job) but the other is fleeting, although the memory of it may last.

Fraughtmum · 29/05/2026 07:36

We spend our money on holidays and eating out, gigs and theatre. Oh and books.
We get many snide comments from DHs family who view us with suspicion anyway for liking foreign cheese and liking contemporary music because in their eyes good music stopped in 1976. Miserable small minded people who thankfully we never spend time with.

Melarus · 29/05/2026 07:54

It's an interesting question, and I think it says a lot about our society - how our choices around money reflect our values and our characters.

Every day we're surrounded by demands for our cash ... adverts, shops, marketing campaigns ... even on MN, our spare-time space, we get ads and promoted posts trying to get us to choose a summer dress etc.

We're locked into a constant process of sizing up these demands and quickly either rejecting them or accepting them (mostly rejecting). It happens so often that it becomes a part of who we are. Seeing someone else make different decisions feels like a disagreement over something fundamental, even though it's really not.

Thanks, capitalism! 😐

Wipeywipey · 29/05/2026 07:59

CoyGoldenKoi · 27/05/2026 17:29

It would be a waste of money to them - their cost/benefit analysis says it's not worth it.

That doesn't at all mean it's a waste of money to you - your cost/benefit analysis says it pays off.

People need to remember that their (& others) opinions are just opinions, not facts. There's very little objective truth in these things.

This response on the first page, perfect.

Someone in my family is very dour and a complete Scrooge. His horror upon visiting my house and seeing my plants was palpable. "So you have to water them every day so they don't die but they don't produce food?" - for him everything has to be financially beneficial. He sits in one room with a heater all winter to save fuel, so his idea of joy is severely limited.

I do think shops like Shein and companies that mass produce commercial plastic crap should be talked to though. If you can only wear it once (if at all because the picture probably doesn't represent the thing you were sent) and it goes to landfill unused after being shipped across the world - that is the joy seeking that is wasteful and damaging.

Badbadbunny · 29/05/2026 08:07

Of course it's not a waste of money if the person buying it/using the service derives pleasure out of it commensurate with the cost to them.

For me, an expensive meal in a Michelin restaurant WOULD be a waste of money as fancy food/restaurants simply isn't my thing, just as a trip to watch the Opera in London isn't my thing. But to others, it most certainly ISN'T a waste of money if it's what they enjoy.

Before marriage and having a family, we splashed the cash on holidays, including Canada, USA, Mexico, Egypt, Israel, Kenyan safari, etc - it was "worth it" to us as it was the only time we got quality time together. I know people thought we were mad to spend so much money, but for us we never thought it was a waste of money due to the pleasure we derived from it.

A few years ago, we bought the most expensive car we've ever bought. Previously we've always bought "mid range" cars from bog-standard manufacturers, but for once, we pushed the boat out and bought a car that's probably three times as expensive (in real terms) as we'd ever bought before. In our younger years, we'd definitely have thought it a waste of money as when we were young and struggling with a mortgage and child, we simply couldn't have justified it. Now, mortgage paid off, still working hard in our professions, son left uni/home and has his own life/job, we have the "spare" funds and blow some of our savings on our "nice" car. It's definitely "worth it" to us - we derive pleasure just looking at it on the drive, washing it, etc. Ask me 30 years ago and I'd have said it was a waste of money. It isn't now. It'll last us out as we usually make our cars last 15-20 years! For us a drive out in our "nice" car is worth more to us that a Michelin restaurant meal, etc.

Now what IS a waste of money is not shopping around for things where you could get an identical item for less money, yet lots of people don't seem to care and buy whatever they want, whenever and wherever they like, i.e. not shopping around, not using comparison websites etc. I suppose they could say they're getting more pleasure by using the time in a different way, i.e. having fun rather than spending half an hour on a comparison site. It's all relevant to the person really.

Didyoufindit · 29/05/2026 08:12

After covering the essentials money is for spending on things you enjoy. We love holidays and spend a lot travelling. But we rarely stay in expensive accommodation (for us ‘a waste of money’), instead we spend on activities and great meals in lovely places.
Just arrived somewhere new yesterday and our lovely host at budget apartment warned us about the expensive food down by the sea, and how it everything was cheaper a few blocks back. So we headed straight for the sea and sat down with an expensive lunch with a view. Totally appreciate her advice but for us that’s not a waste of money.

ZenNudist · 29/05/2026 08:39

Too many friends and family died before they could retire so I try and live more now. We take lots of holidays and eat out often. We get takeaway coffee all the time. We go to the theatre and take trips.

I try not to get hung up on buying "stuff". We recently spent a lot of money on the house but only because it had got to a stage it had to be done. A friend commented that I could afford an interior designer, which is true but I'd consider that a waste of money.

IsItWickedNotToCare · 29/05/2026 08:44

I hate having to spend lots of money on things that are not enjoyable but make my life tolerable, such as probiotics and supplements for dry eyes. It's not enjoyable, but it's necessary. So I think spending on something just for enjoyment should be celebrated if you can afford it!

Takoneko · 29/05/2026 08:51

ZenNudist · 29/05/2026 08:39

Too many friends and family died before they could retire so I try and live more now. We take lots of holidays and eat out often. We get takeaway coffee all the time. We go to the theatre and take trips.

I try not to get hung up on buying "stuff". We recently spent a lot of money on the house but only because it had got to a stage it had to be done. A friend commented that I could afford an interior designer, which is true but I'd consider that a waste of money.

We also have a lot of people who died in their 30s-50s in my family and it’s given me a very similar outlook on life. There’s no sense in putting things off for a retirement that you might never actually get to enjoy. My main extravagance is travel. It’s what brings me most joy and has included paying for my siblings (who couldn’t otherwise afford it) to join us on a big long-haul trip. That is hands down the best money I’ve ever spent.

Sparrowsandbudgies · 29/05/2026 09:18

People like to judge others. I enjoy spending money on eating out, coffees, fantasy books and going on holidays. Others would think that was a huge waste of money.

fancypantstoday · 29/05/2026 09:22

YANBU!

I saw in a recent thread people were saying it's a "waste of water" to have a shower every day.

No it isnt! getting yourself clean is one of the most basic parts of daily living, its not at all a waste. I mean, FFS.

Ohwhatfuckeryitistoride · 29/05/2026 09:27

God I had an aunt and cousin like that. Anything anyone else did, anything from having some lovely but inexpensive flowers given to going out for lunch was met with a sniff, an "alright for some." and a "must be made of money". Took every bit of joy out of it. If it makes you smile, or your life better and doesn't impact others negatively, go for it.(they weren't skint btw. Just perpetual martyrs)

ChestyPeters · 29/05/2026 09:31

If you can afford it and it makes you happy, its not a waste of money.

We all have different ideas about what constitutes a 'waste'.

I think its a giant 'waste' to buy meal deal sandwiches and takeaway tea at work.
DH buys meal deal sandwiches and takeaway teas with gay abandon.

😂😂😂😂

WeatherOrNothing · 29/05/2026 10:15

Littlebitpsycho · 27/05/2026 17:40

I have a takeaway coffee at least 3 times a week 🤷‍♀️ MN seems to loathe that but I enjoy them and couldn't be bothered to make them myself even if I had the equipment (and had space for it)

I get one every single day and so does Dh. On weekends we order in our coffee. It’s something we love so not anyone else’s business!

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