To not be surprised sbout alleged rape claims on MAFS

[Tuxedomaddness]

It was always going to happen wasn't it?
Young fame seekers putting themselves in very vulnerable positions.

Agreed.

I stopped watching it after being repeatedly disappointed with the ‘experts’ failing everytime to call out abusive and toxic behaviour. NOT OKAY, with an audience largely of young girls in their 20s building their perceptions of relationship. I called them out on this repeatedly and Paul’s excuse was always “we don’t see the footage throughout the week, we only see the dinner party”.

not good enough. THEN START VIEWING IT.

also the absolutely PUSH towards intimacy. Not surprised in the slightest at these allegations.

its a shame, I always had a lot of respect for Paul and an emotionally intelligent and kind man. He really disappointed me with his responses. I cannot see how someone like him would WANT to be a part of a show like this anymore.

I am not in the least surprised either. You would think that the programmers would have anticipated this and put in place protocols to protect contestants from sexual assault or false allegations. It was an accident looking for somewhere to happen.

Just been announced that C4 only pulled the episodes after they knew it would go public!

I've never watched the programme.
I thought the whole premise was actually really sordid. People being paid to titillate the tv audience.
Very sad this has happened but, as you say, not really surprising.

Already two threads on this if you do a search

Most of the men on there are walking red flags. No expert pychologists needed for that. Some of the women are walking red flags too, many seen so vulnerable and have unhealthy views on relationships.

I remember when everyone loved Ashley and I was just seeing a creepy misogynist. Then it came out that he broke into the toilet when his wife was using it and was telling him she didn’t want him to come in. WTF?

I haven’t watched MAFS itself but tbh the allegations to me just summed up how often sexual interactions between people involve situations that leave the participants feeling uncomfortable / violated.

And now therr is a third.
What is your point?

My view entirely.
A tacky idea to start with and this outcome is unsurprisingly. But people watch it and that is why it shows.

Can’t actually believe we’ve reached a point in society where this type of telly is seen as not only ethical, but entertainment. Ditto Love Island, Dating Naked and the like.

I agree, like a couple of others on this thread I have never watched it. Because the whole premise is just a bad idea.

@LadyDanburysHat can’t bring myself to watch this sort of stuff either, it’s just trash.

Agree it’s not too surprising, it’s a really difficult concept. Fake marrying a total stranger, then having to live together, isolated from their usual lives/friends/family, I don’t believe they even have their phones during filming to contact the outside world, the drama needed for the dinners etc, it always felt a bit risky I think.

I’ve only watched one season and even on that one season I thought quite a lot of bad behaviour went unchecked. Can’t remember the couples name but I do remember the woman wanting to have sex, the man didn’t, and every single time the cameras were on them the discussion ended up back at that, why didn’t he want to be intimate, the experts probing at every meeting about why not etc, the pressure on him to have sex was a huge focus of their on screen time and even that was unsettling to watch. On that same season one of the woman was quite obviously and openly bullied by the other women and again that behaviour went unchecked, it’s just really not nice viewing.

I feel furious that this programme ever existed. It really feels like the abuses detailed in the Panorama programme are a feature not a bug. It is completely disgusting that people have been put into a situation that is explicitly engineered to distort and overwhelm ordinary sexual boundaries.

What a horrible, horrible place media and social media have become.

I'd say it's what society as a whole has become.

Yes, I agree with that. Media seems to lead the charge, but ultimately it can't take us anywhere that we aren't depraved enough to go.

Yes, reality TV isn't really my thing, so I've never watched any of these shows, but I really don't know why anyone thought they were a good idea in the first place. It's absolutely insane to me that anyone would make them, let alone watch them.

I'm talking about the likes of MAFS and Love Island, or that show about virgins here. Some reality TV seems fine, if not really my thing.

I loved MAFS but I always felt deeply uncomfortable with the pressure put on couples to become 'intimate' to prove they were progressing. I felt that in this latest Austrailia series, where Steven was getting pushed into being intimate with Rachel by the experts and the other couples. He was told over abd again that he was the problem. I think there are many instances over all the series where people have been coerced into having sex when they didn't want to.

Those type of reality TV programmes are just awful.

Conflict and shitty behaviour in general are encouraged because the producers think that brings viewers and there is no proper safeguarding and psychological support in place.

This needs to be investigated by the police and TV producers need to move on from this type of crass shows.

1000% this. And when they didn’t want to be intimate they were sent on these “intimacy workshops” to try and move things along that way, never in a real life situation would anyone believe that is okay.

Yes I agree, sadly. I was talking to my friends daughter who is in her mid 20s. Shes a lovely young woman who would love to have a partner, but after dating for a number of years, she says men out there are mostly really terrible and and even the better ones aren’t great. She watches MAFS and says it is unfortunately representative of the shit men out there.

It was great at first, pre the dinner parties. It did seem more genuine.
they didn’t live together then either. I stopped watching it then when it became like big brother and a series was 36 episodes.

having only occasionally caught the newer series I can see how this could sadly happen.

It was always going to happen wasn't it?
Casting directors Young fame seekers ignoring very obvious red flags putting themselves in very vulnerable positions in prospective male contestants.

Agreed.
They have the 'wedding' and are treated as though they're married and should be acting like a married couple, but truth is they're strangers.

It's the most awkward weird thing. And the fact is if you're not attracted to the person you're doomed. It's highly unlikely you're going to become attracted to them... But you can't admit that without sounding horrible and the experts calling you out... But you can't go along with pretending, and the intimacy involved in that... Eugh...

Anyone with predator-ish tendencies it's like a carte blanche.. isolation, fake marriage and experts advising you to be intimate

Least surprising TV news since that Dutch (?) show where adults got naked in front of children and then they found out there was a convicted child abuser on the show.

We get told to ignore our instincts a hundred times a week.