AIBU to feel this way..

[YakkatyDo]

I’m of a very small family and growing up always felt left out of most things (only child). Now I’m an adult with two adult children, I’d always hoped they’d have children and I’d become a grandma or nan. This hasn’t happened as one child is ND and the other gay and both into-their careers. Whilst I’m pleased the guys are both happy I can’t help but feel left out. I’ve a few friends who are grandparents and love sharing what a lovely day out they’ve had. Whilst I’m happy to listen I have to admit inside I’m screaming ‘lucky you’ now shut up!

This is something I never thought would happen to me as I feel envious and it’s not a nice trait to have ☹️.

Apologies for such a moany post, can anyone relate and willing to offer advice please? Thank you.

I'm the mother of an only adult son. His Dad, my DH , died a long tine ago. I have a few relatives many miles away who I don't communicate with. There are no relatives on my late DH's side of the family. So basically there are only the 2 of us , and we live in different places almost a 2 hour journey apart.

My son is gay and unlikely to have children. I used to be upset that I wouldn't be a grandparent but now I'm reconciled to it and at peace with the fact on my own behalf. What worries me is that when I die my son will be totally without any family. He has a wide circle of friends but no regular partner. And his future as he gets older is a source of worry to me

@Makemeinvisible I hear you. It’s only natural to want the best for our children. You mentioned he has lots of friends, so hopefully they will be able to help support him in the coming years. Thanks for your comments, appreciated.

I understand why you would feel like this. However, at the end of the day, this is to me just another example of how “life” cannot be planned.

I find people who push the idea that you can control all aspects of life mildly irritating. Although the “nothing is impossible, the sky’s the limit “ type approach can be helpful to many people in many ways, they conveniently ignore the types of situation in life where you cannot be in control. I believe that not addressing this issue can be problematic.

The size and makeup of the family you grew up in is outside of your control and so is that of the generations that follow you.

Your 2 pregnancies and subsequent children was a visible sign of the unfairness of life to those women wishing but unable to ever get pregnant. The women having girls but desperate for a boy would have looked on longingly at boys being born.
Parents of severely disabled children have to come to terms with a completely different life path to the one they might have envisioned.