To think the school has unrealistic expectations?

[Anonandonandonandon]

An off-site activity has been pencilled in for 4 days in a row. The venue is about a 15 minute drive away from the school, more at peak times. Public transport exists but is not frequent and will add considerable time.

The children are to be split into 2 sessions. For one, the children need to be dropped at the venue every day by their parents. For the other, they need to be picked up from the venue every day.

We have to confirm and pay for the activity before they will tell us which group our child has been assigned to and what the actual pick up and drop off times are. There is no flex on this at all because it all depends on numbers apparently.

Add to this that some children have siblings attending another off site activity on the same day, again with parents required to collect from a (different) off site venue.

I am left with absolutely no idea whether we can accomodate this around work / the sibling and/or make arrangements with other parents who are equally in the dark. So I can either say no outright, leaving a very disappointed child, or say yes and potentially lose my money if it turns out we can’t do make it work.

I love that the school is trying to provide enrichment, but really feeling the parental guilt with this one!

State school.

AIBU?

I would just decline it. Too much hassle.

It doesn’t coincide with the bank holiday does it ?

No

I think the school are being very unhelpful. They seem to have forgotten common sense.

Who runs the wraparound care? Would there be a possibility of those that attend wraparound care being transported back? We used to do this at a school I worked at. If children were normally booked in for ASC on those days they were transported or walked back to the school. You could not book you children in as a one off it had to be their normal attendance day.

The school does. They are not offering any transport for those attending either breakfast or after school club.

The bit that makes me sigh is the three days’ notice of sporting events along with ‘we can’t tell you who else is going for GDPR reasons’. If it’s five children across six classes (for cricket it was) then I haven’t a hope of finding another parent to lift share with.

YANBU, OP

It sounds ridiculous, if they want to do it they should be providing coach or minibus transport to facilitate it.

If you can do it, do it. If you can't, don't.

Don't tie yourself up in knots over it.

Yanbu, but it’s typical primary school behaviour. I sometimes think they still behave as though at least one parent is at home all the time. Put your concerns in writing to the head teacher and encourage any other parents you know to do the same.

Does the school not hire or have a coach?

I don't know any schools that own a coach and coach hire is incredibly expensive now.

If it is within school hours, they should be providing school transport.

Otherwise they are actively discriminating against parents who don't have the option to be able to take their child to and from this activity. Including those on a low income, disabled parents and those who don't/can't drive or don't have their own car.

Then just decline. Its okay if your child doesn't get to do everything.

Very poor planning and communication by the school. Write to them saying you would love xxx tk take part but like many working parents you need specific details to know if it is possible.

Do you have a class WhatsApp, can you put in something like "hi all, Jamie is looking forward to this event, I can manage to get him there but if he's in the evening session I'm a bit stuck, is there any that can manage the evening session that has an extra seat? Visa versa I'll be able to get someone else to the early session if I'm on that" and get the conversation flowing? This is where it really helps to go to the coffee mornings and build relationships so you can ask for a dog out when you need it.

This is utterly ridiculous. Appreciate they can’t state which group you’d be in because they don’t know final numbers, need to balance groups and personalities etc…but, the timings must be obvious surely?! I would be saying no unless they were able to provide times for you to consider logistics.

We had the opposite - also quite a wealthy primary state school area - they have cancelled Y5 residential. I think less about cost and more about teachers time spent. They’ve kept the Y6 residential at a cost of £480 in the UK. £500 abroad is insanely cheap these days.

We are now doing a Y5 alternative which is £40 if everyone goes and a two day onsite where a company comes to us as does it at school. Think that’s great value for money! 50 out of 60 replied yes. As 10 parents didn’t reply (response form sent Friday night and they wanted a reply by the Monday), they told us it wouldn’t go ahead as the school didn’t have £400 to fund the 10. We pointed out that they hadn’t really given thought that it’s the weekend and mums aren’t glued to their emails awaiting school instruction. Eventually they relented and it is proceeding.

Yes, I’ve done this as far as is possible. See my previous posts.

The thing is, I don’t know if I can do either without knowing the times. There’s a huge difference for us in get them there for 8:30 and get them there for 9 (work issues) or 8 (issues with other child’s drop off).

Everyone else seems to be going down the suck it and see route. I’m not sure there are many willing to put their head above the paraphet.

This sounds ridiculous! It really winds me up when I am chased for a non response after 2 days.

Really? It was the norm in the 90’s and early 00’s most people I know of my era went to France with the school as an overseas trip. Our primary doesn’t do it abroad these days but the secondary do for the 1st 3 years of secondary they have so much choice of countries to go to!

Agreed. My son isn't going to his Y4 residential as the details were just so patchy, yet they gave us a short deadline to confirm and secure a place.

It's no use complaining and then going along with it. Vote with your feet.

I think some parents (not necessarily you OP) get caught up in keeping up with the Jones' and not wanting to appear like they can't afford things.

But she doesn't know if they can do it or not. An approx time for each session is all that's needed to make arrangements.

Surely to gauge interest they should have put out a Google form and had the various options like

would like to attend:
morning
afternoon
either

that way people would have known what they were signing up to and could then opt for different options for their other kids.

we don’t generally get any days out at our primary school or very much brought into the school either. It’s a shame as the kids are missing out, I remember school trips happening often when I was at school and they were always a highlight. It’s not even like they can say it’s financial as the majority of the school are more than capable of paying out for trips, if people didn’t want to go it wouldn’t be due to financial hardship.

Not disputing you might have gone, but it really wasn't "the norm" across the country.

The latest debacle is that they’ve sent lists of AM and PM groups now (no GDPR concerns here!) and suggested we use it to organise lift sharing, but still haven’t given us times.