To take my 6th for daughter out of school for a month this winter?

[CondeNastTraveller]

My dd17 has struggled with the school environment since secondary. Now in a small independent 6th form, but social issues. She has ADHD and ASD. We went on holiday last year to a warm country where she has relatives. Suddenly she was swimming daily, sleeping on time, waking refreshed and able to read! She has A Level mocks in Feb 2027. WIBU to take her back to the sunny place for, say 4 weeks from late Dec to late Jan, so she can study, then come back to do the mocks in Feb? She struggles with winter at the best of times. Has anyone done this? Should I ask school for permission and see what they say?

YABU: don't take her out of school in term time
YANBU:she is not CSA, so take her out, it will do her more good than harm

Edit: I mean 6th form in the title!

This worked for my dd with a similar diagnosis.

I also tried hard to replicate the conditions when back at home, no blue light in the evenings, blue blocking glasses or evening glasses from Ra Optics, morning sunlight and prioritising/supplementing vitamin D.

NO WAY! Four weeks of teaching is a HECK of a lot to miss in 6th form!!

How long were u abroad before though?Most people relax and refresh on a week or two away.

Staying and studying away for a month is quite different.

What does her sixth form say about this,policy wise?

It wouldn't be a holiday. It will be to regulate her to get solid work done, build up her vitamin D and mental health.

Unless there is high risk she will be too mentally unwell to attend and engage at school, would go for a much shorter time, during the school holidays. She’ll miss a lot of useful education and exam prep otherwise.

It’s also not fun studying in hot / nice places.

Also wondering if,with social issues,removing her from her peers is a good idea - a lot to miss out on.

Could you just go for a holiday/ study break during the school Christmas break?

I wouldn't for that length of time. Maybe three weeks max using the majority of the Christmas holidays and the first couple of days of term.

I did exams at the end of year 12 (I had module exams) and didn't do well. In year 13 I managed to pull one module up from a U to a few marks off an A, there is a lot of content covered in year 13 a month is too much to miss.

I will check!

Who will be helping her revise?
Also she will likely be missing new content as although mocks will be scheduled the course content is likely to be still be taught.

depends on the child. My daughter missed a lot of school through health and she got 12 x grade 9’s. I pulled her out of school a month early so she made it through GCSE’s. She is in middle of A levels now. I know she would have studied wherever as she was very self motivated, getting her to not study was the problem. Thankfully much more balanced this time round, but the hospital did a lot of work with her on avoiding burn out

Wouldn't taking her out for that long risk her place in sixth form being withdrawn? How about 3 weeks, from the day after she breaks up for Christmas so she only misses one week of school?

Point taken.

This totally misses that for children with ADHD/autism their way of learning is different to the prescribed norm. 9-4 sat at a desk does not work for so so many kids. Find what works and do that.

she miss four weeks of school - Surely that would be worse for her mental health - to be so far behind everyone else and miss out on valuable exam prep.

Surely she will get at least four weeks holiday over Christmas / New Year anyway? Much longer holidays than state schools.

That's useful to know. What kind of work did they do to help with burnout please

No, she will be missing out on learning half the content of the exams between December and January!

Fair point.

Possible!

How is she going to learn the content that's being taught while she's away?

A relaxing holiday is totally different to study leave.

Unfortunately I don’t know, as she insisted on going alone. It was a 12wk programme with the psychologist at a london hospital. Not just on burnout but coping with life. She is a closed book so not comfortable discussing but she is in a better place now than GCSE’s where she was obsessed with studying day and night. Not sure how she got through it with her health issues. I was really worried and whilst it’s great she did so well, i’d have rather she wasn’t as obsessed so pleased she’s calmed down for A levels.

I think you need to find out what the coursework is like and also it depends on her subjects.

If she's doing sciences, she's going to miss practicals which could scupper her final grade. If she's doing humanities and it's not when coursework is due, it could be OK.

Is she realistically going to use that time to study or is she going to go back having forgotten everything she learned September-October? What are her independent study skills like- will she have the ability to research the curriculums and learn new information by herself?

If she fails her A-levels then that's a big impact on her future, University, career etc.. She's not going to be thankful that she got a month of extra Vit D at 18 if she's stuck in a dead end job at 30.

Sorry if this sounds thick but what does 'She is not CSA' mean please?