Name changed Please can I have your thoughts on something that has rankled for a long time? Some years ago DH & DW got married....a naice wedding in which both families were well matched & it was a well received union. Before the wedding, MIL ( a healthy 62 year old in possession of all faculties who in her youth was attractive, well to do & indulged who had children with her first husband before an acrimonious divorce & second marriage) asked the best man to include a joke in his speech: " Never hunt south of the river & never have your wife before breakfast in case something better comes along" The best man delivered the joke but, rather unsurprisingly, nobody laughed..it fell flat & DW looked taken aback. This has been a revisited source of tension between DW & DH in the intervening years whenever there is a disagreement, as DW felt hurt & that DH should have taken it up with his DM. It has led DW to feel somewhat unwelcome & in the intervening years this has festered. Eventually DH did agree to explain to his DM that her wedding day joke had caused upset & still was doing so. Instead of being mortified & apologising, not only for the initial joke, but also for the fact that her DIL had been upset by it for many years since, MIL blamed the best man for including it, said it was a silly joke, didn't apologise but instead rolled her eyes, tutted & said how ridiculous DW was for being upset by it. DW expected MIL to have realised it was an ill judged comment to make about her new DIL on her wedding day in front of 100+ guests, been accountable & apologised. So...is DW BU ...years have passed..get over it & move on? or is DW NBU it was ill thought through & MIL should have borne accountability & apologised?